cuteness aggression
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@ravmycupine
cuteness aggression

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Picture it. Decades after the world is saved, a huge alien spacecraft touches down on earth.
Scientist, politicians, and thousands of reporters gather to witness the aliens disembark the ship. A group of boulder-like creatures, clicking and whistling to the humans around them.
One of them raises something large and metallic towards the crowd.
There's an immediate recoil of fear (is it a weapon?!) before the audience realises it's human technology. A laptop, old and beaten and looks like it was put back together by a drunk.
The alien presses a button.
"Hello Earth, this is Doctor Captain Ryland Grace. These guys are Eridians and they're here on a shopping trip. I have a list and no money, but I did save the world so that has to count for something. Number one, salt and vinegar chips. Actually anything potato. Number two, I miss apple juice. Number three,"
I really like the idea of Rocky just plopping Simon in front of Grace's door one morning like cats do with like, dead mice or birds
Contact established with the Iron Lung.
Is he deadass, question?
I couldn't leave my bf to himself in the sea of Bloodymary. Now I can draw them being gay.
i dunno i think they like each other

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I like to imagine he spontaneously gets covered in blood for no apparent reason
Among the sizeable portion of humanity who would believe the Eridian footage to be faked, I wonder if âyeah, and Dr. Grace went to live on Erid in a beautiful biodomeâ becomes the new âwe sent your dog to live on a farm upstateâ
Based on this tweet!
a non-canon mini comic for fun
just to reiterate, this is NOT canon to the comic. or to either movie probably lol.
just love the idea that the reason simon didn't listen to the written stuff was because it sucked to read (and not, like, either defiance or a purposeful disregard for the sake of survival)
i feel like you can tell through how little i fuck with grace's glasses in the usual comic that i wear glasses IRL. if my glasses aren't perfectly aligned on my face i am SHOVING them back in place. ryan gosling obviously does not wear glasses regularly
Baby eridians, for a good portion of their lives, are soft-shelled, as Erid likes to call it. It takes a few molts (more than a few, but for abbreviation's sake) for their shells to entirely harden, absorbing minerals from around them and through their food to develop the shell on their exterior. If you need a comparison, consider how human bones fuse and we become less flexible as we get older.
But for a few years (cough, decades, cough), a baby pebble is about as hard as a soft-shelled turtleâor a normal turtle, if they're a bit older. Disadvantages aside, there is an advantage to being able to see your offspring's internal functions. And until their vocal bladders form and they're capable of making multiple complex sounds, being able to see what is hurting is absolutely helpful.
It's a universal experience among parents to lament the day they can no longer hear their pebbles' heartbeats.
That is to say, Rocky knows Grace is an adult, okay? He isn't someone who anthropomorphizes, and he isn't going to start now. Statement.
But when he first heard Grace in all his squishy gloryâ heart pumping away, lungs filling and deflating, organs digesting foodâ his brain went full baby-fever mode. Frankly, he was white-knuckling the urge to find the nearest hypothetical cave, bundle him up into a proper nest, and wait for his skin to absorb the surrounding minerals and start hardening properly.
But because Rocky is sensible and proper and not going to infantilize his best friend (he swears to God, stupid fucking instincts, shut the fuck up!!), he won't.
But sometimes the urge to squish his best friend is overwhelming. He just pinches at him through the permeable mesh of his ball. And Grace will screw up his face (so soft) and go whatâs up bud? I piss you off or something? (He learns what bruises are and sulks for half a day afterward.)
All of that aside, once again, Rocky has gotten used to Grace's heartbeat, his clumsiness, and his one-tone voice. That's his best friend, and he's smart and just as capable as any other adult. He is also the cutest fucking thing to Eridian hearing. Is he also disconcertingly alien, definitelyâ His size, the limbs, the head protrusion (and other protrusions), the leakiness detracted maybe. But his cluster-sibling once cooed at and brought home a pet sulphur slug because, oh my spirits, hear his squishy respiratory system and you tell me that's not the cutest thing on the planet! It blurbles, Rocky! It fucking blurbles!
So, as Erid draws closer and Rocky/Grace become more excited and stressed. (The food has yet to run out, and as good as Erid is, they need substantial help from the human side to figure out how to make proper human nutrition. And finding the right informational packs in all of human knowledge is a very big undertaking.)
Rocky dreads the ever-looming talk heâll need to have with Grace about the fact that Erid may, in fact, possibly find him very, very adorable. And that this might hamper communication for a second while he explains no, that is not a tall baby and no you cannot squish it.

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They wear suits, but they don't even know basic etiquette.
Based on @cowardsexual 's post of a very sleepy phm science team and Grace's teacher instincts
WHY HAVE I SEEN NO ONE TALK ABOUT HOW THE GRACE SCULPTURE LOOKS LIKE THE LITTLE DUDE FROM THIS MEME
THAT WAS LITERALLY MY FIRST THOUGHT UPON SEEING IT IN THE MOVIE
I had to xD
as a bay area resident i, too, would like to be shipped 11 lightyears away where i never have to look at ai advertisements again
What if PHM crew survived
scrapped painting,, thought i might as well post it

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Imagine you meet an alien that's entirely blood and fat. Like all the white blood cells and red blood cells and lipids kept in your body are just out there. That's their entire body, a blob of blood jelly. Even their brain is completely fluid. They constantly forget things and don't seem to notice the connection
They see electricity, the same electricity of your brain. If something is not charged they can't see anything at all, and a room of non-conductive objects would be a complete sensory deprecation chamber. They can see a little bit, but they are nearly blind and only use it to notice sudden changes. If you flash a light at them they scream. Instead they just bring a device that generates a charge everywhere they go. They claim their whole planet is charged, but you have doubts
This apparently allows them to see secrets of the universe. They knew about the big bang through out their entire history, because they can apparently just see the beginning of the universe. They find it beautiful, but not all that interesting. You are jealous
Despite being in space, they have not yet discovered steel or had the industrial revolution. It's basically still alchemists and philosophers, but the alchemy and philosophy works and got them to space. You are no longer jealous
They rely on the temperature being way below 40 degrees Fahrenheit so all the fat stays solid and frozen, and die if it's warm. They consider you burning
They get all their energy from air, like eating, to the point they cannot hold their breath at all. They get other things from food, but refuse to prepare it aside from digestion. They just plop it in basically untouched
They age in dog years, dying a few months after turning 9, and only reach adulthood at age 4. That's an absurd amount of time to spend as a child. The one you met is apparently 5 and considers himself a mature adult. The tantrums say otherwise. Yes, he also has arcane knowledge naturally. You are more surprised they live this long considering everything else about them
They have 4 genders and assigned you one, maybe randomly. Kind of rude, apparently very complex, but they have no idea how to explain it. You aren't asking
You are an Eridian and have just met a human. You must now convince your mate to let you keep them.
Fnally finished fall guy just so i can get into Coltland and this was the first thing that popped into mind, hear me outtt
Instead of the science project, their fallout happens cuz of Colt's accident. And Colt said some super mean stuff to Ryland causing them to go no contact for years
(honestly only added the time relativity hc cuz i love the angst of them technically not being twins anymore but if anyone thinks ryland should be old then by all means tell me )
some gravity falls + coltland twins ss redraws
+additional info