myself and mydog

don't let being born a girl stop you from being the man your father never was

No you see it's even funnier, because in Spanish it's actually "niño blanco". So this guy, who already gets called "white boy", is doing the whitest thing you can do: butcher Spanish spelling and grammar.

Every photo of Johnny Cash and Bob Dylan together looks like a a respectable mafia boss father named Giovanni and his weird son who bites sometimes

Puppy play but the dog partner just puts on a vest with SERVICE ANIMAL printed on the back and sorts their partner's mail and does their taxes and then goes home

Do the duties change outside of tax season?

Yes they also make scary phone calls and order and put away groceries.

Robot play but the robot partner just makes roomba noises and cleans all the floors in the house while the other partner watches tv

Does the robot also get a service vest?

From what I've seen with some roombas, they might have googly eyes

Sometimes the robot partner carries a cat (optionally dressed in a little shark outfit) while vacuuming.

I’m not saying it was a good idea but every society has tried to solve the problem of “society needs organization to function but power tends to corrupt people” and I like how ancient Rome’s answer was the position of the tribune, where you get to have unchecked power with no accountability for one (1) year but after that you’re just a guy and everyone you pissed off can beat you to death with hammers.

Who told you that