uncomfortably cold and paranoid

too many people completely separate disability from themselves in their mind. it's something that happens to other people. other sad people i don't want to think about. are they really even people, it's too much to bear thinking about that happening to a person... those background characters over there. it would never be me, i can't cope with thinking about that possibility.

this mass denialism of the fragility of the human body (YOUR human body) has created a whole category separate from the disabled - the "elderly." since anyone can join it if they live long enough.. no they can't be disabled. that's scary, and worse it's political. so they are just "old." so what they lost their hearing, their mobility, their heart function? that's just how it goes for old people. as if that's not a person as real as you. as if you wouldn't be devastated if that happened to you today (and it can btw). as if you won't be when it's your turn to be old, and disabled.

My grandparents lived to 98 and 103. Read that again— 98 and 103. My grandmother died 5 months ago and was born in 1923.

She was extremely wealthy. My grandfather left her millions. She paid about 13,000 a month for her care.

And her nurses abused her. She could do nothing. She could not speak for herself, feed herself, clothe herself, and the humiliation they made her endure was disgusting. When she tried to express discomfort, they gave her drugs to “keep her calm” (keep their shift easy). We fought like HELL to hold that fucking place accountable. The only reason we were aware is because we hired a private nurse on her behalf, too.

The elderly are a massive, extremely vulnerable, and disabled group. You cannot leave them out of your advocacy, you cannot leave them out of the conversation. “They’re loud, they smell, they’re opinionated, they’re rude, they make me uncomfortable”. I don’t care. I don’t care! They need your advocacy too! I want you to think, if my grandmother— who was in the best retirement home she could afford, with a personally hired third-party nurse to step in where the other carers failed, had such abhorrent care… what about everyone else? What about all the elderly who don’t have a support system?

I've been severely labile type 1 diabetic since I was less than a year old. This means my blood sugars change very often and usually for no discernable or controllable reason. Temperature goes up a few degrees? Whoops, seizure from low blood sugar. Get stressed over anything? Oh hello super high blood sugars that completely wreck me and slowly damage vital organs.

Growing up in the US and being very poor meant, surprise, lack of healthcare. I was on my parents' insurance through the 90s but lol as soon as I turned 18 in 2000 no help at all. Couldn't afford insulin. Lost my left eye because I couldn't pay for the surgery. Have to use a blind cane now and am legally blind.

Also AuDHD with very severe gluten intolerance and several thyroid disorders, endometriosis and POTS. Obviously none of those aside from maybe the blindness and autism are disabilities but ffs with all of them at once shit is tough.

I worked briefly as a patient sitter in a hospital. Left because it's an extremely difficult job. I worked overnights and sat with so many elderly patients who weren't allowed to leave their beds. Several had dementia, but not all - and dementia is most definitely a disability in itself! But even those without it were there for a reason - their heart issues, weakened bones, lack of strength, etc. are all part of the disability that is being elderly, for most people.

Not all. My great grandmother died at 103 and was on her feet in her garden in her own home until the very end. But she's the exception, not the rule.

junicorn

day 06

If you need good blogs to catch you up to speed on Homestuck and Hiveswap stuff, I recommend mischomestuckrants, burn-the-retcon, and scalding-homestuck-confessions

Oh wow.

The racism gets worse.

Fat Horse No. 2

It’s the year of the horse and I’ve always been a horse girl at heart, so I’m finally taking advantage of the excuse to fill the world with fat little horses! These felted friends are about the size (and shape!) of an apple, and if you happen to have any apples to share I’m sure they’d help you out!