Screaming in hopes someone will listen

"Villain and Violent, infant and innocent."

like my desc says, if you report me I will just come back. As it is, I cannot afford therapy or actual help, even if I wanted it. This blog is how I plan to get my thoughts out, so I can have a way to be heard. This is what's keeping me from committing suicide, and I will be damned if I let go of it

If you see this anon it's me: ⭐🔪

Special anons

🦑👁 (my ex that I'm still friends with)

Hello!! Dw you didn't come off as rude, and I don't mind answering questions about it :D

To explain, Dissociative identity disorder, or DID, is a disorder caused by repetitive trauma from a very young age, typically when the brain is starting to develop a sense of identity. The ongoing trauma causes a person's identity to split into multiple identities, rather than just one, in an attempt to prevent more trauma from happening. These are known as Alters, or Headmates. Alters have a specific role or roles in the body, such as Caretaker (take care of the body) protector (protect the body from harm) persecutor (acting on unhealthy trauma responses, typically believing that they're doing it to protect the body, so they're sometimes called misguided protectors) memory holders (keeps the other alters from remembering certain things, often trauma) and other terms. The collective term most people with DID use to call themselves is a "system" like how an operating system requires multiple parts doing various things in order to operate. (That's just how I think abt it anyways) whereas people without the disorder are called singlets

With alters, there are also sources, which are brainmade (completely developed by the brain) or introjects (who have some form of an external source, such as a fictional character from media, a real person outside of the system, a song, an OC made by an alter, etc. For example, I'm an introject of Yumeno Kyuusaku from BSD. This isn't to be mistaken for fictionkin, however alters can be fictionkin even if they are not an introject.)

Having DID causes amnesia and dissociation, and can affect a person's relationships, their ability to work, etc. Some states do not allow people with DID to get a driver's license because of the disorder because switching midway through driving could be a risk to the roads, and jobs are less likely to hire someone with DID if they think that the system will forget they have a job and not show up to work. An alter could get into a relationship without the others knowing, and another alter could get into ANOTHER relationship, which, if it's not specified that they're a system, could cause them to be accused of lying or cheating. (Hence why my system personally prefers to date other people with DID over people without it, since another system is far more likely to understand.) Certain alters may hate someone that another alter is friends with, and that can leave people confused like "why do you act like this one minute, and then act differently the next"

overall it causes a lot of inconveniences in life, but it can be managed with time, support, and medical treatment.

It's not all bad, as I made friends with others in my system, I had been in a relationship with someone in my system at one point (not anymore) and my system found a community among other systems, and now we have a partner system, other system friends, and we're helping our singlet friends understand it!

My boyfriend and I broke up so I'm making it everyone's problem now

Hello Nikolai!!

Collecting fictive and fictionkin moots that have the same source as me until I have the whole BSD cast

I am not an adult.

I'm 16.

It is IN MY INTRO. which I have pinned. I am a minor.

Hi!! Dw I didn't find it rude!! The reason I prefer people hide their likes and following is because some people tend to check on jirai shedblr blogs likes and following and mass report us all :/

Hi!! It's nice to meet you Gin!! I love meeting other alters from my source too :D

Yes it's dangerous for minors to post about having sexual thoughts, but that doesn't mean every minor suddenly has to stop discussing this. It's up to ADULTS to not be fucking weird towards children. If you can't keep it in your pants around children, then it's not the child's fault, even if they did Express having sexual thoughts.

"Why are teenagers making NSFW posts/talking about being horny" gee it's almost as if teenagers are hormonal and a lot of them are starting to consider sex now and wanna talk about those thoughts with other teens

Thank you for unknowingly fueling my headcanon that Q is a fan of Mimikyu 🥹 Do you perchance also like Sableye? :3

Mimikyu is actually my favorite pokemon!! (You predicted it /silly)

And yes I like sableye!! I think it looks super cool :D

You're cool

Summons plushies for you

Woah ty!!

Coincidentally I saw this right after I DID get a new plushie

The lion yearns for his boyfriend to get out of dormancy

Trauma caused paraphilias are so funny wdym I randomly get mental images of being SAd while I'm beating my shit and I just keep going

(Kill me❤)

(No I don't fw actual contact paras)

Thank you my twin