the losing dogs and i are engaging in insider trading

candy before beer youre in the clear. beer before candy hurricane sandy

they are poisoning us today with a thursday poison little do they know we’ve been through a few thursday poisonings so it won’t kill us just yet

"you only like her because shes a woman" yup "you let female characters get away with too much" yes "if a man did this you would hate him for it" indeed

Walter wide was many things but it is extremely funny how he neglected his own flesh and blood teenage son in order to be an even worse father to a wholly different guy

"they've had intercourse" "i know that i'm asking if they've kissed"

this lamb keeps trying to sacrifice itself even though no one really needs or wants it to do that

It’s funny how sacabambaspis is like the funniest looking animal in every hypothetical except for that one picture that makes me feel like I’m about to be killed