i got a secret [ HIATUS!! ]

at eleven, she threw out of the granola bars & carrots that celeste had bought her after pointing out the fat around her stomach ( lilly loved her chocolate, & what child isn’t a little pudgy? she ate more out of spite & poured the disgusting green goop her mother called health shakes all over the kitchen floor. celeste had been so red in the face she looked like one of the many tomatoes she tried to make lilly eat. )

at thirteen, she slices up her favourite shirt to make it even shorter, the hemline stopping two centimetres under her bra, & when celeste sees, her eyes nearly bug out of her head ( she makes lilly take it off, but lilly just bought a see through mesh top & strutted around in that. she loved the attention. )

at fifteen, she steals some of her mother’s valium, along with the good wine & has her own party. granted she got too sick & vomited all over her imported carpet but the satisfaction at seeing celeste near to tears over something as meaningless as a carpet was priceless ( who cries over a  carpet but not their child? )

❛ god lo, lemme’ get the words out --- ❜ 

S t o p

holy SHIT

"I've looked up things about your symptoms.. Are you pregnant?"

"You.. You're pregnant?!"

"I'm gonna be a dad.. I'm going to be a dad!"

"I would never leave you.. I'm so excited for this baby."

"As the aunt/uncle of this baby, it is my right to spoil it."

"___ You two are not ready to have a baby, I can't believe it."

"Who's the spawn of satan? You are!"

"Either that was a really bad cramp, or I'm having contractions."

"Don't be mad at me but... I think I might be pregnant.."

"You know how you said you've always wanted a family? Well.. now we have that chance. I'm pregnant!"

"The protection didn't work, okay?! Now we're having a baby!"

"We.. We can't have a baby! Are you kidding me?!"

"Look at him/her.. She's perfect."

"If that stupid doctor tells me one more hour, i'm going to kill them!"

"Well I think you just broke my hand.."

"I lost the baby."

"We.. We lost the baby?"

"He left me when I told him..."

"What about adoption?"

"I went to the doctor.. and... well.. I don't know how to say this.."

"That one night stand was the biggest mistake of our lives.."

"I'm pregnant and I have no idea who the father is."

"I'm scared, ____! I don't know how to raise a baby!"

"What if they don't want the baby, and leave me?"

"The baby kicked!"

"It's really hard to cuddle with you when i'm this fat.."

"I'm so helpless and fat, I hate being pregnant."

"For the last time, you're not fat. You're pregnant."

"I hate you for doing this to me.."

"You're in labor?!"

"You alright? Is something wrong with the baby?"

"Shit.. hospital.. hospital now..!"

"It's a boy/girl."

❛ mm --- ? ❜ 

the blonde’s voice was slurred, her eyes half opened as shetried to focus her gaze, vision hazy at the edges. her head was pounding, & the side of it felt wet & warm -- that combinedwith her mouth being as dry as the goddamn sahara made lillyfeel like total & utter shit. dazed green eyes followed her bestfriend’s worried gaze over the garden table where she’d smackedher head off of -- upon which was her mother’s stolen valium & a half finished bottle of her parents poshest wine. really, she’d justwanted to zone out for a while, not smash her head in.