(tadc spoilers but in a venty way?)
the way jax like... she literally kills herself.. because she can never manage to be herself..
and pomni comes up to her, in her mind, like the moments between the act and death. it feels like a direct metaphor of the seconda between attempted suicide and death. and.
and pomni *finally* hugs her. and. she cries, and she says "i want to go back" despite how she planned this, and how this entire time she was never able to connect.
and puppet just. thinks about its plans, the scheduled plans that are nigh but confirmed to work, that it never speaks about to anyone.
and, despite all the good, it simply cant be what it wants.
its mom, its sisters, like jax crying out, "you make it so much harder to do this"
but.. what else could she, or puppet, have done?
and puppet feels like. when its dying. broken bones and bleeding somewhere it wont be found, it will cry the same
it too will cry, i want to go back. please let me go back.
even though theres no way it will fit. even though it *wants* it to be over
it will always want to come back, to love and be loved... it will always regret it..
but what could we do, in the face of all we lack, of trauma that only keeps us further, that we never had the space to heal from..
as it said. broken in two ;w;