Tit Enjoyer

Use your PTO

my humours have balanced. I have become mentally normal again

If you become a trillionaire you should immediately be shot and have your assets seized and redistributed. You were a fruit that is now ripe and ready for harvest

I still won't forget when my wisdom tooth got infected and couldn't sleep bc the pain was so bad and I took like 4 of those those blue gel ibuprofens and I finally fell asleep for a couple hours and kept having dreams about beautiful glowing blue animals that help you and I kept waking up thinking the blue animals will help me and realizing wait what are blue animals they aren't real and immediately falling back asleep thinking about the blue animals again

it’s weird that professional letters are supposed to start with “dear.” i don’t even call my mom that

my darling hiring manager. my springtime rose. if hired i will bring a strong work ethic to this position

i love when women have a deeper or raspier voice. its very charming

I think when I say “suspend your disbelief” people think I mean “stop using ur critical thinking” when in reality I mean “just because they didn’t spoon feed u information on why fairies can fly and there’s a giant rat for no reason don’t freak out”. just don’t be Mr cinemasins

“we know it takes this amount of explosives to work, but what if we doubled it anyway?”

i think people are starting to confuse class analysis with bioessentialism. like... no not all men do this, but Men as a constructed social class do do this. that's still okay to say. that is regular material analysis of the world around us.

nine warrior uncles have been spotted running at great speed towards landmarks and places of power