fae/she/they

ur unwillingness to either kill or die for me makes u boring and insufferable

the lesbian computer from portal was right. given the circumstances ive been shockingly nice

ummmm ok *disappears into my portal*

If you have a crush on me prove it and send me $100 😩😂

vampires are so full of shit. "oh the human race is beneath us, you're just livestock to us" I don't think you know what livestock is. do you feed us? care for us? protect us from predators? no. you just slink around dark alleys and ambush people. that's not what a higher being does. that's a bottom feeder. a parasite. karate punches your head off

She Would Say That. She would DO that.

accidentally wrote “never mill yourself” like yeah i don’t think anyone would do that unless they’re wheat or perhaps a rice

reporting all ads as malicious because all ads are malicious

am i allowed to say kill all trillionaires or is that too specific of a threat

basketball players fight over the basketball because they are hypnotized before each game to believe it is their egg

"this doesn't make sense" open yiur eyes

The pipis situation is actually wild like ohhh I love my lightners so much I wish I could have a family I'm going to pretend this egg is my daughter and play house with it . Has anyone checked in on him lately?

i get very #insufferable when I get comfortable with people

Worlds oldest haunted house has passed away at the age of 207

apparently youre supposed to perform. they love it when you perform. but it has to be authentic. they hate it when it's not authentic. but you have to perform.

AITA for realizing that my best friend is actually a ghost and not telling him because i'm worried that if he realizes he's dead he'll finally be able to accept it and fully pass on and i won't be able to hang out with him anymore?

AITA if i've been dead for a while but haven't told my best friend yet because he doesn't seem to have realized i'm a ghost and if he does i'm worried that he'll finally be able to accept it and let me go and i can't bear the thought of losing him?

AITA for killing that guy

i think more final girls should be forty and kind of weird and off-putting

intelligent and weird is so hot

they should allow you to report posts for being gauche or passé