SMILE GOD LOVES YOU!

“In the same way the Spirit [comes to us and] helps us in our weakness. We do not know what prayer to offer or how to offer it as we should, but the Spirit Himself [knows our need and at the right time] intercedes on our behalf with sighs and groanings too deep for words.”

‭‭ROMANS‬ ‭8:26‬ ‭AMP‬‬

This is to remind myself God is and still above all whatever circumstances, situation, decision, future, etc.

I don’t know where to start since He’s moving behind the scene when I just keep doing whatever just to please myself 😞 (how selffish of me) after God revealed to me of what He is still i keep on disappointing Him.

As you know on my last blog, I applied my Australian visa and got rejected and so i re applied, as the days hoes by I am just confident and trusting God but of course it is not easy. AfterI submitted my documentsans pay for the fee( it is expensive ha! Almost 700 aed din un) for what Im seeing myself that eto lang ako Lord, I keep on rejecting Him and His command. I am not worthy to stand up in front,but still He called me bu my name. To start with. How’s my salary? It was not even can cover what my needs (wants pala 🤦🏻‍♀️) but He’s providing for everything 😊 in that small amount of salary where I can save money, I helped other people by lending money, I even got a chance to go to other places.

As the days goes by I started to panic as the day get closer and closer and closer. I drank a beer just to ease my tension, teased a guy at message even worse after that...pleasuring myself! Lord tatawagin mo pa ba ako after all of this?? I keep on disappointing you and choosing this sinful acts/thoughts, not pursuing you. I am a nobody, I am a failure.

You know what God told me. I am not alone. God is with me and I can depend on Him.

His power is limitless

His love me unconditionally

He cares for me.

I struggle a lot doing my devotions. I failed to do it everyday, but God knows how much I'm trying. I always find excuses whenever I fail to read His word and that is extremely unexpectable. But God is so persistent, He will push you to do things you are afraid of, things you are incapable of. Most of the time I ask God, "Why did you choose me?"

I am not deserving. I am not faithful. I often times forget you. I have limited knowledge in this world. I am not good enough.. and today I learned the answer.

He called you because all of those you're not- He is.

He is derserving.

He is faithful.

He thinks about you all the time.

He is an unlimited God.

He is enough.

God called me because of what He is. I was called by grace. Grace- for he saved me and kept being saved. That is our God. He doesn't called the qualified, He qualifies those He called... And yes you are one of them. He called you!

He is the God who died for you 2000 years ago and He is the same God who will rescue you.

Keep your faith. According to His word "For I know my plans for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you hope and future."

Always remember that if God brought you to it, He will bring you through it.

July 1, just got my visa and started panic buying fow winter clothes. I dont have any budget! I was worried since I have bone problems sa malamig na lugar. Also worried dahil syandby ako not sure if I can fly on that day, tried all ailine I can possibly i could but negative ako. All flights are full.

July 6, after my night service I got home prepare my things even if i have doubts. Just waited kht walang tulog still hoping makasay. What i told on my LG whatever we prayed for it its not your will, natanggap namin na maluwag sa puso namin and still praise you.

Last minute got accepted. Literal ha! I was in the middle seat(sympre mas masaya kung window or aisle) but i dont care na i got in!

Before we landed i got emotional kase makikita ko na kapatid ko and his family again and i prayed again kse diba nga anu napapanuod ko na nagcrushed na plane before landing.

When we landedthe pilot said “the plane landed by itself” i daid what the?? And the man beside me that he was surprised because its all foggy sa baba (prone to accident) zero visibilty! Whoah God! Again you amaze me!

Hoping they will come pick me up sa airport but hindi pala. Nag commute aq ppnta sa hotel without knowing where will I go(of course my instruction naman si kuya) ang saya! Loving the moment. Loving the cold weather! Hnd sumakit masydo tuhod ko at ang likod.

After i reached the hotel kontinh pahinga lng nag church na kame! And it hit me. Do i do anything to get closer to God. The most important relationship of all. People in Glow church is so responsive! Nakakatuwa! Nakaka refresh! What keeps me giddy! Dame nla YA and want to attend pa nga eh! Haaaayy naglalkad lakad hnd ko na alam kung saan but i enjoyed meeting new people while exploring sydney kht walang tulog.

Well this is my first time again to express my thoughts and feelings. I'm here in Dubai, UAE. I have my own battles here (well with God). My battle with myself after what God have given me and baptized by the Holy Spirit and on fire with Him "SATAN" is trying to distract me and using my weakness to be apart with God! Now I'm fighting it! motivating myself to pray at night (and now morning also), to read his word and memorize them, read inspirational book and sing praise song. In short, growing deeper with God. God always giving me common sense, knowledge and wisdom while I'm still waiting for my working visa "to have a quality time with Him." I already know what he's trying to reveal but HERE COMES THE STUBBORN ME!! I didn't mind it and continue what I'm doing like exploring DUBAI and do lazy things(watching movie and playing games) LIKE A SLOTH!! Forgot that in the first place He send me to this country to be more productive and not blinded by love of the world (1 John 2:15-17). Second, He wants me to save more souls while growing deeper with Him. NOW THAT'S A CHALLENGE!! To save a soul is not easy but with God everything is POSSIBLE!! I ALREADY DECLARE I CAN DO ALL THINGS WITH HIM. I already take an oath to Him to use me for His glory.

I also realize that he make me remind of Him every time bedbugs(surot!!) bite me. It's true because one night, when I pray that I want to sleep for the entire not without a single bite of bedbugs. PRESTO!! I had a really GOOD Good morning in my face and a big sweet smile but then again, I didn't use my free time w/ God I thank Him for a good sleep though but its not enough! Bad me :(

I went to my school clinic and told her that I have a cough for two weeks and I have spitting blood with my phlegm then she sent me home because of my severe cough and advise me to get a x-ray to make sure that I have no other disease. She gave me an excuse letter so that I will take a rest for two to three days and a request for an x-ray. Before I went to the clinic I change my clothes so I have to go to my dorm after changing my clothes while I was walking going to the clinic some old beggar asking for money to buy a rice and I just ignored him and continue walking it breaks my heart to ignored that old man because I want to help him and give him some food but when I finished my appointment for my x-ray I fought the old beggar to buy him some foods but I never saw that old man when I was walking home. After that I was getting bored and I planned to watch a movies even though I’m not feeling well I need to get some rest and enjoy my vacation for two days so I decided to went home to Laguna I texted my true friend in Laguna and set what time we will meet at SM Sta. Rosa I arrived late so we have to watch the movie the closes time in three o’clock in after noon, after that we buy tickets and drinks and go to cinema theater. Inside the theater we are so noisy it is like we seen each other for years and so much to tell to each other and there is laughing and teasing. So great bonding with them that is why I love them so much and I feel relax when I am with them.

while i was walking going home still thinking who is the one i love, the pros and the cons and where will i be more happier but suddenly the back of my mind was telling me to stop thinking of boys and enjoy my life being single even if i have boyfriend in long distance..hahaha..i still keep on thinking my ex a little while ago while i was walking going home but in my first class i decided that i have no feeling for him that i should not think of him anymore and accept the fact that we are not meant to be. after 2 months still can't get over him i should stop this feeling before i hurt myself and stop thinking too much....i should concentrate to myself and studies luckily i passed all my midterm exam even if i did not study..whew! what a relief...

This month i'm starting to be sloth person and a lazy student what can you ask for a sluggish daughter i know that my mom don't deserve what i am doing right now.. i don't know maybe it is because of my group mates in thesis. I was disappointed to them well they are my group mates they should be cooperative but they are also my friends that start acting weird because of thesis well in the first place they ignoring our suggestion and they do not want to split up the thing need to be done so that we finish our draft early, they want us to work together and what is the result some of us do nothing just staring them, they meet several our thesis adviser without telling us, they finally ignoring us because they think that we are not cooperating..duh!! well i don't care even if they are my friends they have to know that they have faults and once that i know that i had done nothing wrong i don't care if you don't want to talk to me or not..now i need to finish my related lit so that my thoughts would be clear and i do not have to worry no more.