madness of two.

I remember and remember and remember ( I wish I didn’t )

❛  it was the best time. it was an innocent time.  ❜

❛  are we doing it correctly  ?  ❜

❛  who am i talking about  ?  you  ?  ❜

❛  my neighbour was arrested by the fbi for being a cannibal.  ❜

❛  the fbi was swarming our lobby and arrested this guy at a six am raid.  ❜

❛  no, he never said to me in the elevator  ‘ guess what : i might be a cannibal. ’  ❜

❛  he was quiet but he was so hungry.  ❜

❛  we’ve all been there.  ❜

❛  i really want that to be a lie.  ❜

❛  florida is the costco of upsetting people.  ❜

❛  it was like comic con but alcoholic.  ❜

❛  so, i put it in the refrigerator. i took the hat and i put it in the fridge.  ❜

❛  that is an interesting way to look at it.  ❜

❛  this guy touched my car and i’m gonna nail him.  ❜

❛  the mud on the carpet  ?  oh, that’s mine  ?  alright.  ❜

❛  we’re a little different as people.  ❜

❛  there’s always like five of his friends that he calls ‘ the homies ’ sleeping on the floor.  ❜

❛  these are like XXXL shirt and jacket with spongebob squarepants pajama bottoms.  ❜

❛  i must be the best person you know.  ❜

❛  you’re amongst weird company.  ❜

❛  at best, prom is like a wedding.  ❜

❛  i’ve never met anyone who had a good prom.  ❜

❛  you bought a limo  ?  ❜

❛  i’ve been nervous for 35 years.  ❜

❛  they have a room for giraffes.  ❜

❛  no  !  camels, not giraffes  !  ❜

❛  i’m just gonna sit here and eat popcorn.  ❜

❛  this is your day to stroke each other off  !  ❜

❛  warren, warren, warren. that’s a weird name.  ❜

❛  we got high in my room.  ❜

❛  i would much rather eat potato chips on the sidewalk.  ❜

❛  i get scared at outdoor concerts.  ❜

❛  i eat the mushrooms. i eat them all and i start hallucinating, as one does.  ❜

❛  i watched a woman eat a hot dog over a garbage can and i stared at her like she was the mona lisa.  ❜

❛  why don’t you have a seat  ?  everything’s gonna be fine.  ❜

❛  i discard people when i don’t need them.  ❜

❛  much like tantric sex, it’s the same mess at the end.  ❜

❛  give me a vial of your urin and i’ll do it.  ❜

❛  oh, look. we actually did it.  ❜

❛  the penis is triangle shaped.  ❜

❛  do not do that. because you could get hurt or worse.  ❜

❛  it’s called ‘ violins against violence. ’  ❜

❛  but didn’t you listen to our whole philosophy thing  ?  ❜

❛  i know but it’s bullshit.  ❜

❛  oh, no. that was so long ago. who knows what happened in that dark tunnel.  ❜

❛  nope, there is no right way to say this.  ❜

❛  if you’re an adult male who sees no flaws in his father you are an insane person.  ❜

❛  listen to me. we’re going to win. this is going to be fantastic.  ❜

❛  is it me  ?  ❜

❛  i’m not mad at you about the marker. i’m not mad about the marker.  ❜

❛  if i’m mad at anyone, it’s the dog.  ❜