you've got your peyes in a curl
but your drivers license says you're a girl
you've got black slacks and a small round hat
you feel like yentl (what's that? it's pat!)
everyone says you're what you're not
you didn't even drive here becuase its shabbat
you love your car so much you want to lube her
but you're stuck in line reading martin buber!
and you're a conservadox jew
the girls in line treat you like a pariah
a crazy old man's shouting about about the messiah
the workers are laughing at your legal name
you're full of pastrami and societal shame!
everyone says you're what you're not
you didn't even drive here because its shabbat
you love your car so much, you want to lube her
but you're stuck in line reading martin buber!
and you're a conservadox jew
your mama's sitting shiva, cause punk is dead
your papa's sitting shiva, cause punk is dead
your uncle's sitting shiva, cause punk is dead
your grandma's sitting shiva, cause punk is dead
your tante's sitting shiva, cause punk is dead
your rabbi's sitting shiva, cause punk is dead
your cantor's sitting shiva, cause punk is dead
your mohel's sitting shiva, cause punk is dead!
and you're an atheist jew
and you're an anarchist jew
and you're a wandering jew
and you're a jew jew jew!