❛ YOU'RE GOING TO FUCKING DIE! ❜

            ❛ You’ve got problems, New Kid. Whatever you did LAST NIGHT got a lot of people’s attention. ❜

✖ T H A N K  Y O U ! 

     I didn’t do anything for 100+ followers, so I thought I might as well do something for 200+ especially ‘cause it’s the end of the year! And ‘tis the season to be all sentimental and gay, am I right?

So this blog (along with @noowaaay which is kinda on hiatus rn) was born after I decided to watch South Park all the way through from the beginning. I’ve always watched scattered episodes here and there and enjoyed them, but I never watched the show chronologically or considered myself to be part of the fandom. HOO BOY… I thought watching it from the first episode would make it funnier - which it did! - but it also gave me HELLA unexpected feels. And now here I am. Full of emotions. Suffering.

I wasn’t even going to make this blog in the first place tbh. Like, I wanted to but I was hesitant about the fandom and this side of the rp community. But jfc I’m so glad I did. So imma do some shout outs under the cut. Everyone mentioned has made me feel incredibly welcomed and has helped me develop Cartman in all sorts of ways. Because of them, it’s been a fantastic ride through this fandom so far.

( Quick disclaimer! I was literally listing like… all my followers before realizing I should maybe at least try to keep it short. So if you’re not mentioned, I apologize. But just know that I genuinely appreciate you and the interactions we’ve had! And if we’ve never interacted, I appreciate the follow and I hope we can interact in the future. xo )

      “You want to whine about CURSES, Hindsight?        You’re talking to the wrong FUCKING cowboy.”

Main Verse is 21+ & semi-crossover friendly. Drifter Verse is crossover friendly and semi-canon friendly. Canon Verse is straight forward, isn’t it? I am a Single Ship Per Verse, but I can still write a thread unrelated to any of my verses. I am available via di.scord if you would rather roleplay in private. I use art & irl faceclaims in icon format. I do not expect my partner to format or have icons.

                                                       ❛  dude ,  this  is  pretty  fucked  up  right  here .  ❜

❝ God, what if we just fucked one day? ❞

❝ Don’t sass me in front of the internet. ❞

❝ Follow your stupid fucking dreams. ❞

❝ Come at me scrub lord, I’m ripped. ❞

❝ I just wanna have sex with space. ❞

❝ Get in the tub with me, daddy. ❞

❝ Will you just relax and let me kill for money? ❞

❝ That sounds like your problem. Fuck you. ❞

❝ Stay in school. Don’t do drugs. Eat your teeth. ❞ 

❝ Make like a tree and fucking die. ❞

❝ Dude just…just pity laugh at least. ❞

❝ Man, Club Penguin’s gotten weird. ❞

❝ We are like the Stephen Kings of stupid. ❞

❝ Why do you enjoy watching me suffer so? ❞

❝ Do I have to jerk you off to blow your mind? ❞

❝ I haven’t had so much fun since I killed my parents. ❞

❝ Unfortunately I had sex with a guy/girl over the weekend. ❞

❝ What’s a vegetarian zombie say? GRAAAAAAAINS. ❞

❝ Revenge is a best dish served fuck you. ❞

❝ Who wears pants anymore? So 2015. ❞

❝ I need an ice cream sandwich and a gentle blowjob. ❞

❝ Don’t let the door hit ya where the good lord split ya. ❞

❝ The bananas has gone bad! ❞

❝ I cared for those bananas! I raised them with my own two feet! ❞

❝ Did you know I’m a professional joke? My life is a joke. ❞

❝ What if everyone just had constant helicopter dick? ❞

❝ [ name ], does getting me wet fill you with determination? ❞

❝ I can’t prove that someone ISN’T a reptilian. ❞

❝ Wouldn’t it be funny if, like, you lost a family member? ❞

❝ These balls are coming at me fast and furious. It’s like that movie, ‘Speed’. ❞ 

❝ Call me One Direction ‘cause my relevancy is dropping by the day. ❞ 

❝ One time I killed a person and I didn’t report it to the police. ❞

❝ I wanna take a girl to the Grand Canyon, fuck her, and throw her in. ❞ 

❝ Nothing like a gunshot wound to the face to really mellow someone out. ❞ 

❝ If I can’t be the best, I sure as hell can be the worst! ❞ 

❝ [ name ], I’m on a date with a guy/girl right now and you’re embarrassing me. ❞

❝ I’ve made a decision. I’m gonna in the kitchen, gonna open the dishwasher, and I’m gonna climb inside. ❞

❝ I do apologize for my actions, even though they were totally and completely justified. ❞

❝ I could pee on this couch, right now, no problem, while looking you directly in the eyes.❞ 

❝ Look, you tell a couple jokes as a dad and suddenly everyone’s like ‘you’re making dad jokes.’ ❞

❝ All of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are blue, except for three of them. And there are four. ❞ 

❝ And Abraham said unto Moses, ‘Bro, dude, aliens.’ ❞

❝ I’m gonna throw you out the window. We don’t even have any windows in this room…I’m gonna carve out a window and throw you through it. ❞ 

❝ DO IT YOU SACK OF SHIT! – Sorry. That didn’t come out as encouraging as I meant it to. ❞

❝ [ name ], if there’s one thing I can be totally honest about, it’s that I would happily lie to your face.❞

❝ If I took pole-dancing, I would be worried that it would be too erotic for everybody else. ❞

❝ Next time we make love, [ name ], would you please refer to me as your sweet cakey treasure? ❞   

❝ I try to show at least one other human-being my butt hole every single day. ❞

❝ The only people who don’t like sluts are the people who don’t get any. ❞ 

❝ Have you ever though of a career in driving people fucking insane? Because you are already a PRO at it. ❞ 

❝ I am actively looking for ways to get you to shut the fuck up. ❞

❝ First of all, you have to stop calling it ‘Mary Jane.’ That’s the first rule of stonerdom. People will think you’re a fucking narc. ❞

❝ First of all, no one says ‘pot-eyes’, you fuckin’ narc. ❞

❝ If by OK you mean like on the inside I’m just going ‘AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!’ then yes, I’m quite OK ❞

❝ When you walk outside there are three elements of nature that you must avoid: snow, wind, and bees. ❞ 

super woobie tweek who literally cant function without craig

flamboyantly gay boy kyle

SUPER WOOBIE KYLE

on the opposite spectrum, macho jock stan the M A N

kenny “i’ve slept with 90% of south park and that’s all i do” mccormick

bebe “i only exist to be a slut and get in the way of your mlm ships” stevens

wendy “i only exist to be a bitch and get in the way of your mlm ships” testaburger

chain smoker craig. id accept him smoking like w/e but i mean a cig never leaves the boy’s mouth craig

abusive craig

- Stan “I’m so depressed my blood is literally alcohol” marsh

- self harming tweek ( no stop he wouldn’t fucking do that)

- Narcissistic Kenny (bruh I honestly question if they’ve watched the show if they do this to my boy)

- homophobic token (LITERALLY WHAT THE ACTUAL??¿¿¿?)

- homophobic Sheila (don’t do momma broflovski like this)

- any of the non shitty parents being really shitty??¿??

- Kyle “I MUST GET INTO HARVARD LAW SCHOOL OR I WILL DIE” broflovski

- Clyde “all I do is eat , only date blonds, and/or SUPER JOCK SPORT MAN” Donavan

- Kyle being wanted by literally 5+ people at once

-The goth kids being portrayed as abusers in any relationship they happen to be in.

-mental asylum tweek

-Abusive Sheila

- Kyle “what the fuck is intercourse how dare you think I’d even think of that” brofloski

-Drug addict Kenny

-The surprising lack of Jimmy in Craigs gang

-everybody bullying tweek for really no reason

-Anytime you make a character say “this was a mistake” involving anything remotely romantic or sexual

-Craigs family being abusive just bc

-homophobic token (again for THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK)

-marriage obsessed wendy

                                                  TV-14 ✖ Rules