YOU'RE ON YOUR OWN.

friendship demands sacrifices, it demands to quiet down your own trouble, to bury your sorrows and to let a smile graze your lips, to share lies so everyone's heart feels a bit lighter, for a second. ❛ thank fuck, you're finally admitting that i'm the better looking of the two of us, it's been honestly embarassing to witness, i'm glad you caught some sense. ❜ a twinkle in grey eyes, a grin around the smoke before he makes sure to bump his shoulder into james'. his gaze follows his friend's expression, taking in the smile, in the avoiding eyes, sirius knows his friend by heart, better than he knows himself, can trace the lines of his own palm and read james' future there. he's always had a brother, two years younger, but no one felt quite as a brother as james, some kind of soulmates, as if they were made from the same stardust. ❛ i can imagine, ❜ there's a fleeting thought, as wild blonde curls, strong shoulders under his arm, her warm skin under his fingertips, ❛ i imagine it very well. ❜ sometimes he imagines, having her as a wife, the only one he could bend the knee for, the only one he could tie himself to he feels, for she is as untamable as he is, when a hurricane meets another. he lets the ashes fall, gaze lost in the distance for a moment before he brings himself back, the last secret he has for his best friend, the love that has been raging in his veins since he first saw her, at eleven. ❛ from what i remember, you swore fidelity, right ? if she doesn't want it anymore, what's the use, huh ? ❜ eyebrows wiggle, the same question on the tip of his tongue : are you ok ?

sirius is a rock for him, but he was never meant to bear any weight. james will happily make himself smaller so his friends can grow larger, which is all that he's ever wanted for sirius. he's worked hard to make him feel like there is no box that he must be contained to in order to be his friend, so his problems are kept to himself while he is buried with everyone else's. he has no right to complain about this, after all, as it's something that he willingly signs up for with every passing conversation where he buries his thoughts somewhere that even his mind cannot reach. ❝ oh, bugger off. i called you pretty, not the prettiest. have you looked at me lately? ❞ he bumps him back with the same force, shaking his head and pursing his lips together to conceal the grin that's forcing its way on to his expression. ❝ that's a fair thought. my time spent looking in a mirror would be much more depressing though, eh? ❞ once the smile gradually fades, james looks over at him thoughtfully, wishing that he could crawl inside of his mind and see the thoughts that bounce in there unrelentlessly. he knows sirius like the back of his hand, like a book that he's read thousands of times, like the spells they spent seven years practising. ❝ what're you thinking about, mate? ❞

🌿 the sigh involuntarily leaves her lips. kiara's question lingers in the seconds after. andromeda resists the urge to scrub at her face. ( pity parties don't suit you. her step - mother's words echo quietly from somewhere, never lacking their dismissive tone despite all that she has lost. is that what this is ? she doesn't bother angling her head upward to see if the dark cloud still looms. ) " i guess i haven't known any better, " she admits. it's easier to cast her gaze at the unmarred horizon than see the disappointment in her companion's face. " i'm kinda out of my element here. "

andromeda is a girl of many words but no context. for the time that they have been friends, kiara knows no more about her than a classmate who has sat next to her all year. she's guarded, closed off, but can she blame her? everyone has skeletons in their closet that they no longer want to be haunted by. ❝ a lot of people don't. society wants us to beat ourselves up, it's just how it goes. sometimes i think that all the happiness being forced on us is fake -- is anyone really happy? ❞ she tuts in disapproval, shaking her head. the joint still fogs her mind and burns at her eyes, making the earth seem lighter as a whole. ❝ you can talk to me, you know. and the boys -- they can be annoying, but they mean well most of the time. ❞

the pages of the textbook crinkle as he slowly, very slowly, turns his head without picking it up to give her an unimpressed stare. ❝ you're the one bringing up dead bodies, lydia. i was talking about sleep, like a normal person. yeesh. ❞ stiles would feel equally inconvenienced and be complaining just as much if they were out in the woods for some supernatural purposes. a saturday is a saturday! it's the day of relaxation. fuck exams. stiles picks up his head only to bang it against the textbook once, twice, three times before sitting up completely and slumping in the chair. ❝ i'm good at chemistry, you're good at chemistry, do we really have to be here? doesn't breakfast sound more interesting than science? ❞

alex rolls his eyes, his stubbornness as sturdy as a reinforced brick wall. ❝ did it ever occur to you that maybe i'm being an ass to you because you never take no for an answer? ❞ despite his protests, he doesn't make an immediate exit through the doors down the hallway that izzie's body is currently blocking. he pins her down with a heavy glare, wishing that it was as effective as he wanted it to be. she doesn't budge, unfortunately not nearly as skittish as o'malley. after its inadequacy becomes clear, he sighs, ❝ you're not my friend and you can't help. unless you can go back in time and make me pass my boards, you can't do shit. ❞