Me and fiancé I guess are back on but it’s more like were committed to each other in others ways like by learning how to cut wood lolz and so not by like title lol Schrödinger fiancé , we’re both in weird transitions in our life lol but actually FR event wise, and we were like it’s annoying to cling to someone during that or it makes things fragmented plus he wouldn’t leave his gf of 9 yrs LOL but then I was, ok why am I drinking the relationship koolaid like stability in this exist in a title like I already knew that I wasn’t gonna be happy if he broke up and was mine and moved to Jersey like that actually depressed me more like even if ur a lover and love being with ppl something can die in you once u enter the role or lik ya I did see something die in me and I was like I don’t want to be this way. Idk I cut through the angst cause I was like time is the only authority I respect. But ya sometimes all these wounds are like something unruly that should just bow to greater force and the angst is that the individual knows they can’t blame their partner for hurting them or like there’s a narcissism in thinking behavior is indicative of worth but they still blame relationships because we all think saying the truth of how we feel and being human is like despicable
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