Pain Is Never Permanent

One of the hardest parts is knowing that I could have been Sun as a teenager. My parents were open and accepting and I had no secrets and I had no idea why anyone would have a secret from their parents. I never did out anyone, luckily, but I understand how it happens. And how it happened here. Sun is just so used to honesty and she has no reason to consider any other reaction... even though she should know better... I get why she doesn't. It's wrong and she should not have outed anyone without being certain it was okay but I see the innocence of where she comes from, that certainty that every family can be like your own if you just treat them that way.

But Ongsa's face here? That fear and that pain and that instant worry? The way Alpha had already reminded her that she would have to tell their mother someday? The knowledge that she already fears this? Oh, it hurts.

And this just hurt. But it also shows that Sun wasn't looking to Ongsa during this. She wasn't following her signals or seeing her face fall or her nerves. Nothing of the sort. Sun didn't wait for Ongsa, didn't consider what she wants or what she was ready to do... she outed three people without a second thoughts or a moment's hesitation. And as much as I want to live in a world where that's something no one has to worry about or hesitate about, we don't live in that world.

(This also shows, honestly, how little they've talked despite dating each other. That Sun doesn't know Ongsa is still in the closet to her family? That Ongsa has never told Sun about all of this? They're dating and they love each other but none of this has come up because they're young and they assume everyone thinks the way they do.)

THIS is where I get frustrated with Sun. Seriously? She is not young or innocent enough to truly believe there's no such thing as homophobic parents or people or that staying in the closet is a thing no one does. I understand her relationship with her parents has shaped her but to take this level of offense at Ongsa trying to stay in the closet when they did discuss them coming out publicly and it was always Ongsa who hesitated and didn't want to tell others? It's rough to see.

NEVER?! Never!? That's what you take from this Sun!? It has NOT been long for you to be waving around forever in her face. You've never even discussed what coming out to her parents might look like or why she's in the closet and now you're upset and outing her more thoroughly in your upset?! The agony.

Poor Ongsa. She's barely holding her together and her girlfriend is outing her to her parents and her parents are frustrated and she didn't want any of this and now she's stuck in the middle and it hurts so much to watch her.

Sun, how you can look at your girlfriend looking like this and still out her to her parents?! Come on!

Repeat after me, kids! No one deserves to be outed, no matter what you think, no matter what you believe, no matter your comfort level. No one deserves to be outed. Do not out the people you love. Do not out them even if you think it's for the best. People come out in their own time and in their own way and everyone deserves that.

Now you've got me thinking on that AU I have tucked away that I'm still putting together... Where Kate has a twin....

I have this weird little story I’m playing with in my head where she and Noah actually had a bunch of siblings. Maybe fundie parents? With Kate and Noah as the oldest (maybe twins?) then a big gap when their parents got sort of radicalized, and then had like 6 more kids. So she has all these siblings out there but she doesn’t really know them and hasn’t felt like part of the family at all since Noah died.