Emperor of Melons

"Well, that was an easy interaction. Who knew they would serve as a distraction I would actually want?"

"I think that if I were forced to choose, there would be no hesitation in my answer. I would much rather see a mortal man stripped down to bare skin."

A watermelon.

"Well, that was an easy interaction. Who knew they would serve as a distraction I would actually want?"

"Do you deny your obvious lust for my strip-ed body? Its smooth curves are far better than any mortal may have."

"I am to be usurped…by fruit?"

“Underestimate? I make no estimations whatsoever — melons are not worth the effort. Go back to whence you came, you disgusting little eyesore!”

The melon rolled itself upside down, looking at the taller male with anger in his eyes. It appeared that the light of the evanescence had disappeared into the void from whence he'd came. "I am Emperor Melonecia. If anyone shall be stepping aside, it shall be me. I have been eaten once, but not twice!"

?????????

"Leave my sight or I shall be forced to unleash the terror of my inner juiciness."

"I am to be usurped…by fruit?"

"You underestimate my ability. Walk away, fleshy peasant. My stripes have seen more bite in a citrus' core."