eli

You were running to your lecture hall for your longest class of the day when you saw the Leclerc brothers, Arthur and Charles. The two men were walking with multiple car parts in hand which wasn’t unlikely for them as their father owned an auto body shop they both work at. They’re regulars in your shared apartment with Oscar since Arthur is good friends with him and his brother loves tagging along for the stealing of video game controllers (and free food). The two stopped to watch you whiz past as Arthur called your name out, causing you to whip your head around.

“Where are you in such a rush to?”, he said in a normal tone as you walked closer.

“Vettel’s class. One that I’m gonna be late for if I don’t make a run for it. But, uh, what’s with all that?”, you wave your finger, gesturing to the car parts they’re both struggling to juggle in their arms.

“Our father had a bit of an emergency with a client so we’ve gotta go fill in!”, Arthur chirps, smiling like he’d won the lottery. The lottery being the ability to use your father’s lack of employees as an excuse to skip class.

“I hope all goes well with the client, and it’s always good to see you guys but Charles shouldn’t you also be heading to Vettel?”, he raises an eyebrow at you.

“Huh? Ah, well, this is…a bit more urgent at the moment. Could you please give me the notes later?”, he pleads.

“Yeah, but you owe me! You have yet to restock my fridge with the beer you chugged last week!”, you playfully call him out.

“Yes, yes, you’ve got it! Lots of beer!“, he throws over his shoulder as the two brothers start walking away.

As you get to class, you notice Oscar is nowhere to be seen. It’s not like him to miss this one, he’s always up pretty early and it’s only 10am. When you saw him before leaving the apartment today, he looked fine…unless he wasn’t and didn’t think he could tell you. So you figured you’d be a good best friend and check in on him in a totally calm and collected manner.

[to osc 🤗🫛 10:08am]

where are you????

why are you not in Vettel's class???

are you good? you seemed fine this morning

are you dead

are you in trouble

i dont think the rent will get paid on time if you’re dead

He wasn’t answering and it had been about ten minutes since you sent your last text before you decided to head out to the hallway to call him. He wasn’t picking up either and you were getting worried. Your pacing was driving your heartbeat to a not so steady thumping, you could hear it in your ears. That’s when you heard a familiar voice from behind and an all too familiar hand came to your shoulder, effortlessly stopping you and turning you around.

It was Oscar and he was out of breath. Weird. His fluffy hair looked like more of a mess than normal.

“Hey, YN. What’s up?”, he says way too innocently.

“You bastard!”, you yelled in a sort of hushed tone while you smacked his arm. “I texted you a million times! And I called! God, I thought you were dead.”

“I’m sorry for worrying you. I wasn’t in danger I swear. I just- I went on my morning run, then went home, and fell asleep on the couch. I just figured running to class was the more effective option rather than catching the bus you usually take.“ He was still catching his breath and weirdly nervous, but at least he sounded mostly apologetic for scaring the shit out of you.

“And what about your phone? Do you not have it on you?” You questioned.

“Oh, yeah, I forgot to charge it last night I guess.” He shrugs and starts walking past you towards the lecture hall door. You roll your eyes and follow him into the room.

It was a regular afternoon after you were done with your classes for the day. You had been on the couch, sitting against the arm of it with your knees pulled in close to your chest, nose buried in your study notes. The key turned in the door and you knew it was Oscar coming home, finally. You looked up from your end on the couch and squinted at the dark hallway as he walked towards you, head hung a little low at first, but a prideful smile spread across his lips when he finally looked up at you. He almost immediately pulled off his hoodie after he slid off the backpack slung around his shoulder and tossed both to the floor. He dropped down on the couch, letting his head fall back against the cushions and you decided to stretch your legs out onto his lap.

“Oh, I finally have a night off and I’m your foot rest now, huh?”, Oscar turns to meet your eyes while crossing his arms while chuckling.

“I’m just taking advantage of my favorite pillow finally being home to hangout for once. No Leclercs tonight?” You sneer, looking back down at your notes that he immediately snatches. “Hey! I was reading those!”

He flips through the pages and groans, “This is for that project in Vettel’s class, isn’t it? And, uh, no, they had to cover their dad again.”

“Yes, the one you narrowly avoided the first half hour of on Thursday. Which reminds me, why did you miss so much time? You never sleep in, Osc. Even after a run. I’ve never seen you slack off like this, are you like, good?” Your scoff towards the end catches his attention and he looks up as if he’s been caught.

“Cmon, I already told you why. I guess I'm just…a little more tired lately. Don’t worry about it, YN, I’m fine.”

You get it though. He works at a bar and takes a lot of overnight shifts and yet still usually shows up on time, he works hard that’s for sure. You never really hear him come in and if you happen to be awake when he gets back, he doesn’t even reek of beer when you pass him in the hallway on the way to the kitchen…it’s weird. Sometimes, he even comes home with a bit of a limp but waves it off as having to walk so far from the train station.

Although you both go to the same university and you both are roommates, you feel like you’ve barely seen him since the summer, which is upsetting to say the least. You tell yourself it’s because you used to hangout all the time and you just miss your person while you’re both having to live adult lives. Separate but together. You hated it. You two were practically inseparable growing up and although distance makes the heart grow fonder, it only makes the curiosity in your own brain grow stronger. Given that you and him have different schedules this year due to you changing your major, you tell yourself again that of course seeing him on campus would be next to impossible but you can’t help but feel like maybe Oscar is avoiding you althogether. Maybe he’s got a girlfriend, but he’d tell you, his best friend since forever, right? …Right?

Later on in the kitchen, you were fixing a couple bowls of ice cream for you both. It was tradition for you two after having long days at work or school and started back in high school after a particularly difficult exam.

“You know you can tell me anything, right?”, you peered into the living room, holding both bowls in either hand, Oscar was now watching TV on the couch.

“Huh? I mean, yeah. What’s got you all sentimental? Is it the ice cream?” He turned his head slightly to look at you approaching the couch, grabbing the bowl with less of the dessert, moving his legs so you could sit down.

“It’s nothing, really. I just want you to know you can trust me. You’re my best friend and I’d hate for us to be keeping secrets and shit.”

You finally plopped down on the couch, facing him. You couldn’t figure out his face, it’s like he thought you knew something but the look quickly washed away as he laughed and called you ‘ridiculously serious’ for a Monday night.

“That Spiderman dude is insane!” the girl behind you in the dining hall line exclaimed, causing you to turn around and ask what she was watching. She excitedly turned her phone towards you, a video on her screen showing the hero swinging from building to building effortlessly while using his webbing to stop and catch some guy with a duffle bag most likely from a bank. Spider-man’s suit looked so ruffed up and full of rips, but no blood. You couldn’t help but wonder if he was as invincible as everyone made him out to be.

You turned back around after nodding in horror at the idea of someone you know running around the city like that.

Spiderman wasn’t exactly new, he first emerged during your junior year of high school, just about three years ago. Everyone in your city was enamored by the guy. There were older ladies he’d offer to help across the street before swinging away and chasing men in full get ups. He once helped uncover an illegal street racing gang run by an ex drug dealer that was guzzling money from the mayor's office, ultimately resulting in said mayor getting indicted. It was the biggest story of the year and even got picked up by news outlets in Europe given how big racing is over there. It did a number on the Leclerc family business since many people believed they were involved, given their father’s past with the mayor but nothing could be proven in court.

“YN, are you daydreaming about Oscar again?” Arthur nudges you with his elbow and a smirk as he sits next to you. You jump.“No. Just..thinking.”

“About?” he prodded.

“That Spider guy.”

“Charles, Oscar, you won’t believe it! YN’s got a crush on Spiderman!” Arthur calls out to the two men approaching the table, sitting in front of you both. The tips of Oscar’s ears and cheeks turn bright red, not that you’d point that out in a setting like this, but you do notice.

“I did not say that!”, you flick his forearm as he’s reaching for his spoon. “I just said I was thinking about him. Big difference.”

“So then what’s got you thinking about our beloved arachnid in spandex then?” Charles asks smugly.

“Just that he seems a little reckless.” you shrug.

“Reckless? What’s so reckless about a superhero?”, Oscar pipes up.

Spiderman did good by the city no matter what. He made it clear that he never had ill intentions when it came to the citizens but, his work was dangerous and he didn’t exactly work for the city nor the police by any means. That meant he couldn’t be controlled no matter how much the old mayor and many older people in the city wanted him to be. He always stands for justice, that much is clear as well but it worried you for how much he could be endangering everyday citizens he stood for, especially since he was masked so no one knew who he was.

“I mean for one, I’ve seen him swinging around in the city and having powers is cool and all but he seems to get hurt easily. Where did he even come from? Who does he work for? How do we know he’s a good guy?”, you take a bite of your pasta. “Cmon, he’s a bit suspicious.”

“He protects the city, that’s not suspicious, YN.” Oscar retorts while shifting uncomfortably in his seat.

“Are you Spider-man’s lawyer, mate?” Charles nudges his shoulder and Oscar rolls his eyes at him.

“No.” He shifts again, looking back at you. “I just can recognize what he’s done for our citizens and it may look dangerous but it’s important.”

“Jeez, I hit a nerve. Didn’t realize I was talking to Spider-man’s number one fan!”, you try to laugh it off but Oscar keeps looking at you. His gaze is sharp, as if he’s trying to figure out if you seriously hate Spiderman. You don’t but it’s hard not to have a little suspicion towards the guy. Oscar quiets down for the rest of your lunch. You notice right away, knowing how quiet he gets when upset but you just couldn’t quite put your finger on why it got him this worked up. Unless? No…no. He’d tell you! That’s ridiculous!

“Hey, you wanna play some Mario Kart? I’ve got it all set up! Winner gets to pick the take-out place tonight.” You peer into Oscar’s room waving a controller in one hand while slowly opening the door with the other. Your eyes drop to him sitting back and sleeping in his desk chair that’s more of a gaming chair you gifted him a few years ago. His body would seem relaxed to anyone else but as you took a few steps into his room it was anything but that. His hair was a complete mess, his breathing was ragged, there was a cut on his lip, and some bruising on the side of his jaw. “Oh my God, what the fuck happened?”, your squeal jolts him awake.

You toss the controller onto his bed, sitting on the end of it as he sits up slowly, yours and his knees touching. He leans forward slightly while rubbing his face with his hands, eventually peeking out from behind them like he didn’t believe he was even there.

“Holy shit, you scared me.” He drops his hands to his lap, looking at you straight finally.

“I scared you? You scared me! What’s all this? Who did this to you?”, your tone frantic.

“Oh, I, uh, took up a boxing class lately. It was some GroupOn thing my mom sent me and I figured I’d check it out.” Oscar answered. You brought your hand to his face and held his jaw stroking his cheek gently. He almost instantly melted into your touch, looking up through his thick, brown eyelashes.

He looked so tired, and almost too tired to have just been boxing. You wanted to believe him because best friends believe each other no matter what, above all else and whatnot. But there was a pang in your chest telling you it wasn’t the whole truth. You knew it had to be more. You searched his eyes for it before he stood up and your hand dropped to your own lap now.

He started looking around for something when you stood as well to wrap your arms around him, pulling him as close as you could. You rested your head against his chest hearing his heart beating as it seemed to steady your own breathing while you squeezed your eyes shut. He took the initiative to wrap his own arms around your waist tightly.

“What’s this for?”, he asked. He was seemingly just fine by your sudden need for a hug.

“I just needed this, I guess.” your voice is a bit muffled from his arm being so close to your face. You pull back and rest your forehead on his chest and sigh. You didn’t want him to see the tears welling up in your eyes as this had been the closest you two had physically been in ages.

“I think I needed this too, YN.” He kissed the top of your head.

That’s new.

You don’t have time to question it before he pulls back and checks his watch, rushing around to grab some stuff, shoving it into his backpack and telling you he’s gotta go meet the guys. You quickly wipe your tears without him noticing.

“Why couldn’t they come over here like usual?” you questioned.

“Oh, uh, Charles’ car broke down yesterday so I offered to just head over myself.” he turned to you, slinging his back around his shoulder.

Hmm. That was weird because you had just seen Charles driving it around an hour ago before you got home. He leaves you standing in his room and tells you he’ll be home in a few hours.

That’s not enough for you so you decided to follow him. You grab your phone and keys, throw on a black hoodie and head out the door.

You followed him out carefully. Every time he turned a corner or crossed the street, you did too. Eventually, you realized he wasn’t headed towards his friend’s house at all, it was in the complete opposite direction. What the hell? Where is he going?

He got on the train at some point and to not get caught, you got the car behind him. You checked the subway map to see where the train was headed: downtown. Downtown? The bar he works at isn’t downtown. And who even goes downtown at 8pm on a Wednesday night?

You looked up to see him getting off the train to which you quickly shoved your phone in your pocket and headed up the same escalator steps he’d been rushing up.

How Oscar didn’t realize you were following him was beyond you.

He’s always been smart and you’ve always admired him for it even if your friends and his called him a nerd or a dork, but it’s what you liked most about him. He was quiet as well, never saying too much. It’s almost as if Oscar knew not to speak unnecessarily, in fact, he always let you speak more. You always had something to say, you had many ideas and wished to put them out into the world. One of the reasons you two became so close at a young age was your fear of being too loud, too annoying, and too much but to Oscar you were enough and he was enough for you too.

He’s usually so intuitive and has been since high school. He’d always know when someone was about to run into him so he’d shift his feet and quickly move to the side. There was even a time he blessed someone twenty seconds before they sneezed!

As you got up and out of the subway station, you took in the chilly, fresh air. You looked up and saw the FormulaCorp building and your mind went blank.

You looked up for long enough before deciding to look back down and he was gone. Oscar was just gone. Fuck. You didn’t even see where he had disappeared to. Crossing the street didn’t help since you almost got run over by three speeding taxis in a row. It was impossible not to wonder what business he’d have here. You walked into the building’s lobby and up to the front desk spotting a young blonde woman with glasses.

“Welcome to FormulaCorp. How may I help you today?”, she looked up from her typing with a warm smile. Gwen. What a pretty name.

“Yeah, uh, did you see a guy walk in here? He’s this tall,” you raise your hand to just about where he towers over you. “Hes blonde…ish?”

“Sorry, I haven’t seen anyone with that description. Is he a missing person? Need to phone the police?” She asked while tilting her head slightly with knit eyebrows.

“No, no, it’s okay! Sorry for bothering you!” You faltered and waved your hand in dismissal. Turning on the heels of your feet, you headed back out the front doors and shoved your hands in your pockets, frustrated at his disappearance. The only thing you can think of to do now is head back home. As you get back, there’s something weird on the window in the living room. You hesitate but eventually bring one foot in front of the other and get closer. It’s white and stringy, and has a bit of tension when you press on it. What could that possibly be?

[to osc 🤗🫛 9:34pm]

we should hangout this weekend

if you’re up for it, i miss my bsf!

lmk when you get home

[from osc 🤗🫛 11:25pm]

yeah.. i miss you too

i’m home but you’re sleeping so i’ll see you tomorrow

sorry for leaving like that…

Oscar hadn’t really spoken to you the rest of the week. He watched a movie with you in almost complete silence in his bed the next night and after you fell asleep, he lifted the blanket up to your shoulders. He then crouched down next to where your head laid on one of his pillows. His eyebrows furrowed out of frustration, he knew he couldn’t keep his secret from you forever and it pained him. As he brushed some of your hair out of face and watched you sound asleep for a moment, he kissed your forehead. You smiled in your sleep and he smiled back before he decided to sleep on the couch for the night so you’d have space to sprawl out if need be.

He’s been on edge lately, something you thought his so called boxing classes would help with but if anything he seemed worse and on Sunday night, you got confirmation of it.

You knew that tonight you needed answers. Oscar is your best friend. Neither of you had hid anything from each other since you were 12 years old. Never any crushes, lies, or wishes. Putting things out in the open had never been terribly difficult either and to think he’s felt like he can’t tell you about whatever is happening to or with him, has been slowly breaking your heart for too long.

You two were on the couch, watching some action movie with lots of speed chases that kept his eyes glued to the screen. His elbow leaned on the arm of the couch, palm pressed against his cheek. His eyes drifted from the TV to where you had been cuddled up on your side of the couch. One leg folded up to your chest, the other stretched out onto his lap while he was absentmindedly rubbing his thumb on your ankle. It’s nice when you’re comfortable. It’s the safest you’ve ever felt.

“Let's go on a trip.” He blurted out.

“Why?” you pulled your attention away from the movie towards him, chuckling a tiny bit, “Don’t we have final projects and exams to do? Where would we even go?”

He wasn't normally very impulsive but his energy was entirely different tonight. His hand grips your ankle a little tighter than you thought possible. Jesus. His eyes also widen a bit and you can tell his new found excitement is going over the top now.

“Anywhere. As long as you’re there, I know it’ll be a good time! We should get out of the city.” He urged.

“Osc, I’m flattered but don’t you have business at FormulaCorp to attend to?” you prodded.

“I- Wha- What?” he hesitated and pulled his hand away from your leg, adjusting himself to sit up as you retracted your leg.

“I saw you. The other day. I know you lied about going to Arthur’s place and so I followed you.” you shamefully admitted.

His demeanor shifted almost immediately and entirely. His head tilted and he looked at you like he couldn’t believe what you just told him. “YN, you cannot go sneaking around, sticking your nose in other people’s business.” Oscar scolded, getting up from the couch and storming away. He’s not like this.

“But you’re hiding something! I know you are!”, you’re louder now, following him towards the kitchen.

“Just because we share a lease, I don’t deserve privacy?” Oscar hissed.

“Of course you do! But I’m worried about you. I- I don’t even know what’s going on with you lately and I’m fucking worried.”, you so badly wanted him to hear it in your voice; the fear that’s consumed you so often.

“You can be worried and still give me space.” He stands across from you at the kitchen island, hands placed flat on the surface, shoulders hunched up to his ears as he sighs.

“I do give you space. I try so hard to stay out of your way but if anything, you’re the one pushing me away and I fucking hate it. All you do is disappear, I feel like I’m living with a goddamn ghost, Oscar.”, you declared, slamming your hand on the island.

“I’m not pushing you away, I’m keeping you safe, YN.” He looks up at you through those long, brown eyelashes.

You furrow your eyebrows and scoff, not taking him seriously. At least not fully. “Keeping me safe? From what, a secret girlfriend?”

“Wh- What? No! Look, I’m sorry for keeping you in the dark. I care about you, more than I should honestly. But this shit is…quite dangerous. It's way bigger than us. Honestly, the less you know, the better.” He grabs his hoodie and keys, hurriedly walking towards the door.

“Don’t leave. Please, let’s just talk about this. Why is it dangerous for me and not you? Where are you going?”, the desperation you’ve wished to keep swallowed is now seeping through the cracks of your friendship. The one you so badly want to keep intact but cannot seem to.

He turns slightly towards you and sighs, shaking his head. Tears had welled up in his eyes but he blinked them away. He continues out the door and it slammed shut leaving you with a gaping mouth and tears welling up in your eyes as well. A hallway that’s usually decorated with your shared laughter, is now no more louder than a mouse. You waited for too long. Waiting for him to come back, for him to hold you again and tell you it’d be okay, even a text like the other night. But it didn’t come.