G R O W T H

1. speak with kindness. don’t speak harshly to yourself. speak with compassion and tenderness. you’re not dumb or stupid, you’re learning. also, be mindful of your loved ones feelings when you speak.

2. slow down. drop the plans and go with the flow. meditate. plan a getaway. take a nap.

3. let yourself feel. when you feel like crying, cry. when you feel like laughing, laugh. when you feel like screaming, scream.

4. be playful. not everything needs to be taken so seriously. spend time around babies and animals. watch cartoons and fairytale movies.

5. learn. be open. ask questions. be curious without commitment.

6. build a connection to nature. take a walk in the park. smell the flowers. cloud gaze. listen to the birds. walk barefoot in the grass. sunbathe. have. a picnic.

7. decorate. surround yourself with things that makes you feel happy. look on pinterest for creative ideas. hang pictures up in your wall. buy cute trinkets. make your space aesthetically pleasing.

8. make yourself a nourishing meal. cook/bake. learn new recipes. eat tasty foods.

9. play soothing music. listen to calming sounds or music that can put your mind at ease.

10. let stuff go. seek for a harmonious environment. stop arguing. stop worrying and let universe handle it.

Pay attention to your friends comments because they could be mentally abusing you without you noticing. When I was unemployed my ”friend” made so many comments about people who are unemployed. That ”they” are ruining society and all that. And let me tell you as soon as I got a job the comments stopped? This whole year she hasnt been making fun of people who dont have a job because its probably not fun for her anymore since I have a job now. This was not the only thing she commented either. If you are in a situation where you can not end the friendship for example if its a classmate or family friend try commenting back.

Also pay attention to when your friends call you and what they have to say. This same friend used to call me every night screaming about all the b*tches and ”h*s at work (thats what she called them) she could even call me screaming and crying but when good stuff happened she never called me. I would also see on her snapstories that she did fun stuff with other people and I was just the one she called when she was sad or angry.

Never lower your standards. You NEED people who are loyal by your side. If your friend dont hate your worst enemy its not your friend. A real friend will naturally dislike someone who hurt you.

Dont humble yourself too much. If you are suspecting one of your friends are envious of you they might be. And this can get really ugly especially as a teenage girl. Never share too much with this ”friend”.

Stand up for yourself do not try to make a bully like you because they dont ”like” people they can only respect or fear you. Either fight back or ignore dont try to kiss their ass.

If you are not welcomed there dont go there.

LISTEN TO YOUR INTUITION. Maybe you are wrong about that person and maybe they are actually kinda nice STILL something is making you feel the way you feel and its better to be safe than sorry.

If the person you are interested in is treating you bad please try to leave. I spent my college year with a guy who treated me horribly and it ruined my self esteem. So much time wasted.

Try to find your own style you wont look good in everything thats in. Some of the clothes I forced myself to wear because it was cool didnt look good on me at all.

If you are feeling insecure try looking at celebrities who look more like you. Instead of looking at people who look like you want to look. Stop torturing yourself.

hey everyone! i’ve found myself in a bit of a journalling/shadow work rut and thought i would give myself a little challenge to do for the next 30 days. i know that this is pretty common for a lot of people, so i thought i would share my challenge with you so we can keep each other accountable and do some reflective work 🤍 obviously you don’t have to do all 30 days, and this can purely be a prompt list if you need it! you can join in whenever you like 🤍

what is something you wish you could be doing right now? what’s stopping you?

if you could receive the truthful answer any question of your choice, what would you ask? why? what response would you hope for?

if you could change anything about your childhood, what would it be?

name 3 of your least favourite things about yourself. then challenge them - why do you think that way? what could you do to change?

what relationships in your life bring you joy and which ones don’t?

how could you show yourself love in your love language?

when was the last time you felt at peace?

write a letter to someone who hurt you - no matter how long ago. write everything you wish you could say to them, every emotion that comes up. burn, tear apart or flush away the letter

how would you treat yourself if you were a young child? how could you make them feel loved? see where you could incorporate that into your life

what triggers your temper most? why does it make you angry/frustrated/sad?

if you had everything you ever wanted, what would your life look like?

what emotions or feelings do you avoid? why?

what are your core values? do they align with the life you’re living right now?

what do you hate about yourself and why do you hate it? did someone tell you you should?

what negative patterns keep repeating in your life?

when you lash out, what part of you wants to be protected?

what is something you fear others knowing about you? why do you fear it?

in what ways do you consciously or unconsciously punish myself?

what is a grudge/instance that you are holding onto that no longer serves you? why are you holding on to it? how can you let it go?

what are your pet peeves? where do you think they come from?

when was the last time you felt wronged by someone?

when are you the hardest on yourself? why? can you find a way to be kinder to yourself?

how do you respond to situations that make you angry?

what are you the most proud of in your life?

in what ways are you hypocritical?

when am i my truest, most authentic self?

what advice would you give to yourself 5 years ago?

what boundaries do i need to set and reinforce in my life?

what things make you feel the most alive and present?

I enjoy journaling. It’s almost like therapy, but you’re figuring it out by yourself. You’re trying to figure out your own issues by putting it on paper, sometimes it’s for self reflecting or for figuring yourself out. This is very similar to shadow work. 

What is shadow work? 

Shadow work is addressing your shadow self, the side of you that you bury deep down and avoid. It’s your unconscious mind, and it is important to uncover this side of you in order to achieve your highest self. There are multiple ways to do this, but the most known (and most effective in my opinion), is journaling. I thought I should share 100 prompts that really make you think. 

1. What was one time you remember feeling wronged as a child? How did you react? Has this affected you into adulthood? How?

2. Think about one time where you’ve felt betrayed. What would you say to the person who broke your trust?

3. Write about a time you felt let down by someone you’d previously looked up to.

4. What’s one trait you see in other people that you wish you had. Why do you not possess this characteristic yourself?

5. Do you often find yourself over-thinking what you’ve said or how you’ve acted? What usually triggers this?

6. What were your parents’/guardians’ core values while you were growing up? Do you hold these today or do they differ? How so?

7. What are your core values as a human being? What’s the most important to you? What are you morally passionate about?

8. What tends to trigger envy for you? Why do you think this is?

9. What are the first signs that your mental health is dipping?

10. When are you hardest on yourself? Why? Where do you think this stems for? Why do you put yourself under so much pressure? Why are you so reluctant to be kind to yourself?

11. How do you react when you’re angry? Is this similar to other people who have been in your life since childhood? Why do you think this is?

12. What triggers you? Can you identify where this came from?

13. How do you perceive failure? What is your definition of failure? How does it make you feel? Are you afraid of it? Why might this be? How did your parents/guardians react to failure?

14. What situations make you feel less than or not good enough? Why do you think this is?

15. What is your relationship with your parents and/or siblings like? How was it as a child compared to now? Why do you think this is?

16. What parts of your parents/guardians growing up do you see in yourself now? When did these begin to become apparent?

17. What toxic traits have you recognised in your parents? How did it make you feel when you realized that your parents weren’t perfect? Do you also possess these traits yourself?

18. What are your toxic traits? How do these present themselves? How do you project these onto others?

19. What aspects of yourself would you like to improve? Why? Has anyone in your past ever made comments suggesting that you should? If so, how did this make you feel?

20. How do you feel about who you are as a human? Why?

21. How often do you forgive yourself? What kind of things do you feel you need to be forgiven for? Why is this?

22. Write about a time where you messed up and needed forgiveness. Did you ask to be forgiven? Did you apologize? How did it play out?

23. Do you form obsessive or unhealthy attachments easily? Why do you think this might be; do you have a fear of change/abandonment/rejection? Or, on the other hand, do you find it difficult to form emotional attachments; do you struggle with commitment or get restless staying in one place for a certain amount of time? Where do you think this stems from?

24. How do you fill your time when bored? What gives you enjoyment? What self-care do you regularly practise?

25. What negative emotions do you tend to avoid? Why might this be?

26. What negative emotions do you actually feel quite comfortable sitting with? Why might this be?

27. Write about one person you’ve never forgiven. What happened and why did you not forgive them? Was it warranted? How has this event affected you going forward? Do you think you could forgive them now? How did you move on from this?

28. How do you carry the weight of your past trauma? How has it affected you?

29. How did you process emotions as a child, teenager, and young adult? How do you process negative emotions now? Has this changed over time?

30. How do you enforce boundaries? How do you feel when people overstep them? How do you react?

31. What is the biggest lie you consistently tell yourself? Why?

32. What misconceptions have you noticed about your harbor? Can you think about where these started?

33. What are your preconceptions about femininity? Why do you think this is? Where did they come from?

34. What are your preconceptions towards masculinity? Where did these come from?

35. What does the term ‘Shadow Work’ mean to you?

36. What are three main goals you want to achieve with your shadow work?

37. Did you have any heroes growing up? Who did you look up to and why?

38. How were you taught to deal with emotions as a child?

39. How do you deal with negative emotions now?

40. What’s the most hurtful thing you’ve ever done to someone else?

41. What’s the most hurtful thing you’ve done to yourself?

42. How have you moved forward from hurting someone else?

43. How do you plan to move forward after hurting yourself?

44. What’s the biggest promise to you that someone else has broken? How did it make you feel? Why?

45. What’s the biggest promise you’ve broken to yourself? Why? How do you feel about that?

46. Have you ever broken a promise to someone else? Why?

47. When you really think about it, is there any area of your life you’re in denial about?

48. What do you constantly lie to yourself about?

49. What do you lie to other people about? Why?

50. What’s the biggest lie you’ve ever told and why?

51. Have you ever had your heart broken? Write about this time in your life.

52. Have you ever broken someone else’s heart? Was it unintentional or intentional? Write about this.

53. Do you ever find yourself manipulating people in an attempt to protect yourself?

54. What’s a question you had as a child that you never got a real answer to? Do you have that answer now?

55. What is something that you’ve always wanted to confront someone about? Why haven’t you? Do you plan to? Why?

56. What is the meaning of life to you?

57. What was the last argument you had about? Was it resolved?

58. How do you feel about confrontation? Why do you think this is?

59. Do you ever have physical reactions to emotional feelings? Write about these. Why do you think this happens?

60. What’s your favorite way to self-soothe? Describe your perfect self-care day.

61. What family patterns am I repeating? 

62. When was the last time I truly felt at peace? Where was I? Who was surrounding me? 

63. In what situations do I feel less than others, equal to others, or better than others? Why do I feel that way? 

64. How do I define failure? 

65. What has been my biggest personal failure and why? 

66. When was the last time I felt jealous of someone else? What do they have that I want? 

67. What is your ultimate dream? Are you currently living your dream? What steps can you take to make it happen?

68. What is your favorite book of all time and why? Movie?

69. Are you doing what you love for a living? What is your dream job?

70. Make a list of 10 things that make you smile.

71. What do you wish you could do everyday?

72. Write down your own bucket list.

73. Write about someone who inspires you.

74. What’s an embarrassing moment you can look back on and laugh now?

75. List 10 of your favorite things, can be anything.

76. Write down your top 10 travel destinations.

77. How do you spend your time alone?

78. What are you the most grateful for in your life?

79. Do you care what other people think of you? why?

80. What excites you about the future?

81. What are some new hobbies you would like to try?

82. How do you want to be remembered?

83. What do you want to accomplish today and tomorrow?

84. What is your favorite song and why?

85. What motivates you?

86. What are your top priorities in life?

87. What are 5 physical features that you love about yourself?

88. What gift do you think you were born with?

89. What holiday or event do you look forward to every year?

90. How would you describe yourself to a stranger?

91. What life lessons have books taught you?

92. Which fictional character would you most like to be, why?

93. What is your favorite place?

94. Is there anything that has changed your outlook on life?

95. Can you keep a secret?

96. How would you change the world?

97. Are you good at organizing your time?

98. What would you do if you could travel into the past?

99. Where in your life do you need to be more fearless?