Nerdy shit

Pacific Rim is great because of the absolutely fanfiction level of its plot points. Want to pilot the giant robot? You’re going to need to share your most painful memories. Who will you share them with? YOUR CRUSH

#theres only one robot

“influencer” is such a sinister title. it’s got all the menace of “royal adviser” but none of the raw sex appeal.

it is both tragic and freeing to accept that your mother is not capable of being the mother you always needed her to be

the cool thing about the iliad is that almost everyone in it is a horrible person and/or literal war criminal, so you get to judge characters EXCLUSIVELY by vibes. anyway i don’t blame paris for the trojan war but he IS a little shitheel and i want him out of my city

“That Paris, what a himbo.”

Jurassic Park except they provide proper enrichment for the animals and they therefor don’t feel the need to hunt slow, small humans.

“We stuffed this pumpkin full of live goats for the T. rex watch him try to get them out with his little fingers.”

“Turns out the raptors are cage breakers, so we’ve gotten them a series of door handles to manipulate. Little guys just love it.”

"The Rexes are incredibly affectionate pack animals, so we were careful to breed multiples. Be sure to come during spring time to watch them go broody over anything even vaguely egg-shaped." "We put the Raptors through target training and now if they are bored, hungry, or just want a scratch under the chin they go to spot near the bars and ring a little bell for attention." "Imprinting after hatching was so common that we now have keepers under contract to care for the animals well into adulthood to prevent them from pining." "The Gallimimus turned out to be just giant Canada Geese, and so fear nothing. Their keeper regularly has to stop them from trying to attack fences, guests, feeding buckets, and the now traumatised pack of Ceratosaurs in the next paddock."

"We also fired Dr. Henry Wu."

I have questions for OP either about how big they think a pumpkin is or about how small they think goats are.

In a fictional genetic theme park, we play by Roger Rabbit rules. They’re however large they need to be to make my joke work.

I respect that. Question withdrawn.

Y’all, I ain’t never seen a whole Star Wars film, but Mark Hamill? Is an actual Fucking Saint™️.

That thing guys do when they rub their tip up and down your clit and almost push it into your hole but then just keep going up? That’s how to get a girl d e s p e r a t e

<3 I want a full length witch romance based on this <3