The Gentleman Aunt

It's better to be respected than to be feared. That's why I make all of my scarecrows look like positive crow authority figures

when the puckish homie loses his elan 😫😫

Why didn't they just call the Baltimore Oriole the Baltimoriole? Are they stupid?

Come, you simply must meet my associates! This woman right here is a delightful pervert of sorts, and this fellow here, he’s some kind of a fucking idiot.

at the start of every month everyone reblogs some insane poetry that’s like “august has arrived and again I swallow my bones in the burning sun” and every time I’m like damn that makes no sense. but kind of true.

omg guys happy bone swallowing august

i know this is tumblr and we’re all playing perverts but i just think some of you would be excellent company for a late night walk and a four hour conversation about absolutely nothing

i recently found out what the * * * that sometimes separates parts of a text is called and youre never gonna fucking believe it

Can I say something

The word Ottawa looks like a caterpillar

picturing a man alone in his silent, dark apartment bobbing for apples. it’s soaking his hair and the carpet