too weird to live, too rare to die!

AMELIAAAAAAAAA

greatest dynamic in the world IS strange, eccentric asshole and their normal and polite friend who on closer inspection is actually worse in deeply weird and unexpected ways

you learn something new everyday. unless you're a historian. then you learn something old

May you always have enough for rent.

OK so nobody is running in the Clacton By-Election because: 1. If Farage Loses, he avoids the investigation into his £5 million donation. 2. If Farage Wins, he will be investigated, found guilty, and forced to stand down, after which another by-election will happen where all the parties will run. Basically, they want Farage to not avoid being investigated. But one person is running, seemingly to Mock Farage: Count Binface. All of this leads to the possibility of an objectively hilarious scenario: Count Binface Wins the election.

you solve the mystery of what to have for dinner one night and you think "hell yeah case closed forever" WRONG there is a dinner mystery the next night too

EVERYONE STOP TELLING ME HOW OLD YOU WERE IN 2008 I DONT WANNA HEAR THAT SHIT

SOME OF YOU SHOULD BE AT THE OPRHANGE

preschool. I meant preschool.

also I don't think parents "these days" are uniquely terrible, I just think neglect is showing up in new ways as technology progresses. today's ipad kid would've been wandering around in a ditch alone all day and night before. parents not wanting to have to deal with children is not a new phenomenon.