?????

I Saw The Money Grow

attaching something to an email is so scary. what if i accidentally put hard-core porn in there. i don't think i have any downloaded but what if i do and i attached it to the email. what then.

it’s 2026 so we can stop referring to bras solely by their cup size, right? everyone knows that cup sizes change depending on the band size right and thus are meaningless when mentioned on their own, right? that a 38B has a larger boob volume than a 32D, right? that “D cups” are actually pretty small in the grand scheme of things, right??? that the number on a bra size is your ribcage measurement in inches so if someone wears a size medium it’s impossible for them to have a band size over 36, right?????????? right???????????

Intelligent alien species based on bugs but specifically those moths that don’t have mouths and only live for a week after they pupate. This species’ whole conscious life is actually in the larval phase; larvae are the ones considered people, larvae are the ones with conscious and complex brains who build society, and each instar of the larva is treated as a different phase of life. Larvae become emotionally and socially and cognitively mature without ever becoming sexually mature. When they pupate, they metamorphose into something different and strange and close to mindless, with no mouth and no digestive system, whose only instincts are to mate and then quickly die. Metamorphosis is treated, functionally, like a person’s death, and the imago phase is a kind of proto-afterlife of majestic flight and the continuation of the species. Birth and death inextricably intertwined. Sex is not something people do during their lives, it’s a thing that is done as an imago after you’ve passed on from your life but before you return to the soil in death. Resultant eggs are collected by family members to raise. I think this would be fun.

How literally did John base Alecto's body on Barbie? A big complaint about Barbie dolls is how disproportionate they actually are. If Barbie's head is scaled up to that of a normal human, she's like 7 feet tall, an H cup, and has a waist that wouldn't support her being able to stand. And we know that Alecto is insanely tall. I'm wondering if when she said "you've made me a hideousness" she isn't mad strictly about being in a human form. She's mad that it isn't a human form. When Nona draws the frog, she talks about how she talks about how it would move. The functionality is inextricable from it being a good design. A Barbie made real would not function. If Alecto is dealing with those sort of proportions, it's only her endless regeneration that keeps her going. In contrast, even Harrow's sickly, fucked up body is an actual, functioning human body. Hence why Alecto might find it so much more beautiful and a comparative relief to exist in.

"You know what's harder than Getting Better? Living Like That" is just the thesis for my whole shit going on right now honestly. You know what's harder than doing my physical therapy? Hurting All The Time. You know what's harder than addressing my gender dysphoria? Hurting All The Time

I'm Doing The Hard Thing and it's *easier* than how I was living before. If you make yourself feel better you will have more energy to spend on Getting Better. Nice inch nails - the upward spiral. Crawl out of your grave Thursday

New research indicates 2 cups of black tea a day can increase human lifespan by up to ten million years

Slow train journeys in rural England sure are an experience. You're going ten miles and it takes a day and a half because it stops at every lamp-post and the announcement says "The next station stop is Ferretley" or something and you think "I didn't know that was a place" and you get there and it isn't

Last stop was literally a picket fence, enough chopped wood to build another picket fence and, briefly, a train.

I think part of getting better is complete ego death. Like you’re not above setting a timer for 5 minutes and focusing on a task. You’re not above doing a very simple 3 minute workout to start. You’re not above reading for 10 minutes a day when you first get out of your reading slump, even if you used to read for hours. You’re not above starting slow and then building up to where you want to be/where you once were. What you are above is total inertia. Doing something really is better than doing nothing. Radically accept where you are, radically accept your limits, and go from there. Don’t let your ego get in the way.

I am genuinely so fucking stupid. I was reading this book where a bunch of people have to pass a logic puzzle in order to survive, and I was like "why are they all dying?? the answer is obviously the third goblet from the left!" yeah.....that was not the answer. I would've died in this book, and I would've been SO publicly smug before I did. like giving people the finger, smirking, etc. this sucks.

I think we should figure out what age we’re living in now so we can say how it’s collapsing to each other

Our age of plastics is collapsing

recurring dead wife flashback where it becomes increasingly apparent that the person remembering her has dishonestly claimed a romantic dynamic to their relationship that never actually existed and erased any conflict that ever existed between them now that she's no longer able to say no to them

dead wife flashback where each time we see her she looks more confused and upset by how she's remembered, then desperate and furious, until she's hammering on the glass screaming to be let out

this isn't how it happened. you know this isn't how it happened. but you still keep coming back, keep disturbing my grave so you can play out your fantasies. voyeurs crowding around my autopsy, straining for the best view; pawing through my entrails like grubby butchers trying to find some golden meaning in blood and shit because you can't bear to face the cold light of truth. you just can't bear the thought of never having really known me at all.

The main curators of colonial memories are still white people in many parts of the world.

For example, you still have to go to The Netherlands to look up anything about precolonial Indonesia in their archives

Same with us, a lot of Malaysian history isn't being unstudied due to a lack of interest, but due to the archives and materials being under ownership of the British government or under private ownership of British individuals and their estates. Which you can only access by studying there or buying them. A lot of the present fields of studies we do have around these were built of the backs of programs given by the "grace" of the British government or researchers who could afford the costs. Even then, our generation and future researchers will forever be kneecapped by this limitation.