hiii!! @novagrippia - Tumblr Blog

hihi!!! I'm Nova

used to be bagels-almost-definitely-exist

I don't mind spam notifications

currently using @schmice-schmockey

#new pinned post woo #grippia talks #also i just changed my pfp alsjdjske it used to be the hands pressing the snail soap dispenser #(<- 25th dec 2022)

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snowkissedmonsters

Also on age verification: I have been on this website since 2011. Unless you think I started blogging at age 2, you KNOW I'm an adult.

dreamerinsilico

#the fact that 'can prove access to an online account at least 12 years old' or even 'account to be verified is itself fully 18 years old'#AREN'T accepted methods of age verification is such a telling sign of what the real purpose of age-gating laws is:#data harvesting and deanonymization and the buildout of state-controllable ways to restrict both content and internet access itself en masse (via @shinelikethunder )

⬆️

sunderwight

Mulan AU where she does get caught by the other fresh recruits while she's bathing but Mushu helps her spin it like the lake is cursed by an evil lizard demon and will turn men into women if they stay in it for too long.

From there it's not actually difficult to get the other soldiers onboard with covering up the fact that poor Ping took one for the team and got afflicted by the vagina curse, especially since it would have been all of them if they hadn't gotten the warning ahead of time. So they agree to help him cover it up, because obviously the army's not going to understand.

Shang is... tentatively glad that the men are bonding and getting along, even if they continue to be deeply weird about it.

great-art-and-a-purple-tongue

Ling: Hey man, what's up— you've got boobs?!?!

Mulan: Uh, what boobs? Huh? Where did these come from?

Mushu: *facepalms and thinks quickly* (speaks from the shadows) I AM THE SPIRIT OF THE LAKE! BEWARE MY CURSED WATERS FOR THEY WILL TURN MEN INTO WOMEN!

Ling, Yao, and Chien Po: Oh no! The spirit of the cursed waters!

metazanni

I love tumblr's dedication to solving problems in the funniest way possible.

karvina

this girl was showing all the signs of being a secret mermaid so i pushed her into the pool and she turned into a forty foot long mosasaurus which is tbh way cooler

karvina

not really sure how to get her out though

karvina

for those of you asking why i pushed her into the pool in the first place: i work for a duplicitous small town aquarium and i'm trying to kidnap mermaids to jump through hoops and shit to entertain tourists and make money. fucking obviously. now that i know she's actually a mosasaurus though i Have fallen in pure-hearted love with her

hometoursandotherstuff

crazy-pages

Sometimes you try to write one research paper and your subjects inform you that you will be writing an entirely different one.

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no one more frugal than an upper middle class man who earns more than you

#this is my first time dating someone who comes from a posher background than me and it is WEIRD #why are you so weird about money #you're fine

fellator

this fetish stuff is getting out of hand what the fuck is word play

21st-century-minutiae

In the early twenty-first century, "play" is a commonly used suffix (or follow up word) to describe a sexual kink activity. For example "waxplay" represents a sexual activity involving hot wax for sensory purposes (mild pain and pleasure), while "ageplay" refers to sexual activities that emphasize a (simulated or real) gap in the ages of participants. Regardless, the idea of X play is (sexually) playing with X.

"Word play" is not a sexual activity. It is the act of using the structure and definition of language to make jokes. Puns are a common type of "word play." It is playing with words, without any connotation of sexual activity.

The above poster is well aware of this definition. The are humorously claiming ignorance of word play. Adding to the humor is the fact that the above is an example of "word play" as it draws attention to the sexual use of the word "play" and the very innocent use of it.

if I were me, where would I have put my keys

sleepyspoonie

when you see a tumblr poll with this picture attached and you know it's time to lock the fuck in lest you get a bad grade in an impromptu absurdist pop quiz you didn't know you were about to take

charl0ttan

best multiple of nine

9

18

27

36

45

54

63

72

81

90

Voting ended onMay 28

#i got a bad grade in number choosing :(

tysonfurybattlepass

public defenders get behind me. i’ll defend you this time

tysonfurybattlepass

“so you like criminals?” I LIKE THE RIGHT TO A FAIR TRIAL.

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adrenaline-revolver

“Eridians dislike earth because they abandoned Grace.” *Incorrect Buzzer Sound* ya missed the point of the story buddy! It’s not about someone being ‘bad’ it’s about the incredible power of love and that love being worth dying for!

Gimmie Eridians who are absolutely heartbroken to hear that humans where so desperate and so scared that they where willing to part with not just one Grace, there were three of them! Gimmie Eridians touched to find that the humans planned a way for their sacrifices to be as comfortable as possible. Gimmie Eridians who send earth a message saying “We know it must have hurt to send your heroes to die, but one made it and he’s safe here. We lost 22 good Eridians on the journey we would have lost 23 if not for your Grace.”

Give me humans sitting on Earth slowly coming to the conclusion that when we look up not only are we not alone, someone out there is alive because of one of us. That no matter what we think of ourselves a whole species thinks highly of us because we helped save the galaxy. Give me humans who figure out how to send a probe to Erid filled to the brim with messages for Grace and footage of a monument being raised that reads his name, his crews names, and then “in memory of the 22 Eridians who lost their lives on the journey to save the stars.”

prokopetz

I think the weirdest form of fatphobia I keep bumping into is writers suddenly becoming deeply concerned with physical realism when a fat character is involved even in contexts where everybody's physical capabilities are explicitly bullshit. "They're fat, it wouldn't make sense for them to have super speed" and it would make sense for the 98-pound twink to be able to run at Mach Fuck? That's something skinny people can do in real life, is it?

darkaviarymc

Tragedy alignment chart. Feel free to use, but please reblog if you do.

mikkeneko

And of course the second part of the tragedy, which is: which quadrant did you think you were in vs. which one you were really in

mynameisrocks

tlirsgender

Many jokes about packers flopping out and bouncing away and such but I still wasn't prepared for how genuinely disconcerting it is for a second when your brain has accepted this as Part Of Your Body & your thang fell off. My pebis

tlirsgender

Every time I pull my pants down to go to the bathroom and watch My Penis go with them I have to like. Recalibrate

fratboycipher

(via @lunnefisk)

keepcalmandcarriefischer

It's the last day of April

my-little-bologna

Wake up babe, new meta layer just dropped

thetragicallynerdy

[ID: a pot of water boiling on a stove. End ID]

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$fractally blog's avatar$

fractally

I am a fan of the dynamic where there's no leak and Shane moves to the Cens of his own accord and then Shane and Ilya never come out exactly but they just live openly and all these dumbass hockey players are just like

"Oh yeah they're just like that. They live together and room together and vacation together and get mad if they're separated on the bench. And they kiss in the locker room sometimes but it's you know. They're joking around. Good guys. Gay? Well---no I don't think so. I mean that's weird. Roz is a pussy hound. I mean I've never seen him with a woman but you know he is. Anyway Hollander had that whole thing with Rose Landry and he still talks about her, I think he's still hung up on her. Poor guy. I did walk in on Hollander sleeping on Roz's lap the other day but they were just getting in sync for power play you know? You reporters always want to make everything gay it's so weird. What do you mean 'why do they kiss so much' they're the top goal scoring duo in the league"

shrubdrawsalot

one of many from that video commissions <3

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