just a city queer

Schools of philosophy need cooler names. It shouldn't be called structuralism it should be called some shit like the path of the ancient bronze spider.

Then is post structuralism the contemporary bronze spider or the iron spider?

Post structuralism is called the Dragon Dance

Their one friend who's always wearing a denim vest with no shirt and suddenly has a horse following him around at all times has a weird vendetta against you for seemingly no reason

They've given you two antique Rolexes.

you are not allowed to cry. their hot, french friend points out that you need to wear a tie. at one point, they ask you to spend several hours driving multiple buses to an empty lot. you will never not be wearing a tie ever again.

you drink blood straight from one of their hands and it gets you so high you punch through a brick wall. immediately after this, they have you escort patty babcock (21 year old college student they have been obsessed with for months and ordered two food trucks for) to them for a meeting. when they dismiss you, you’re still so high that you jump thirty feet straight on the air and sprint out a window.

You start doing some research and eventually come to the conclusion that your bosses are vampires, and you’re a ghoul. The only ghoul in town that you know of. You’re invited to a gathering of the supernatural, and you’re introducing the various factions. Steeling yourself to announce yourself as a ghoul, finally, proudly, and then that fucking horse comes in and steals your spotlight and you’ve missed your moment.

can’t believe brennan FINALLY romanced a murph pc. and it was fucking darkness man. and it was fucking MOON DUDE

Any time you feel like you’re behind (especially if you’re in your 20s, but this applies to literally anyone) just look yourself in the mirror and be like “boo hoo you didn’t peak when u were 17. So sad. Whatever shall u do” and I promise u will instantly feel so silly for ever worrying about it

Hey. Why isn’t the moon landing a national holiday in the US. Isn’t that fucked up? Does anyone else think that’s absurd?

It was a huge milestone of scientific and technological advancement. (Plus, at the time, politically significant). Humanity went to space! We set foot on a celestial body that was not earth for the first time in human history! That’s a big deal! I’ve never thought about it before but now that I have, it’s ridiculous to me that that’s not part of our everyday lives and the public consciousness anymore. Why don’t we have a public holiday and a family barbecue about it. Why have I never seen the original broadcast of the moon landing? It should be all over the news every year!

It’s July 20th. That’s the day of the moon landing. Next year is going to be the 54th anniversary. I’m ordering astronaut shaped cookie cutters on Etsy and I’m going to have a goddamn potluck. You’re all invited.

Hey. Hey. Tumblr. Ides of March ppl. We can do this

Hell yeah moon holiday

Ooh coming up we should celebrate

PITCH: We call it Moon Day, and then every 7 years when it falls on a Monday, that's an even BIGGER deal and we call that Moon Day Monday and go absolutely apeshit about it (the next Moon Day Monday is in 2026 so we have a couple trial runs first)

MOON DAY MOON DAY MOON DAY

moon day is 20th July!!!

Scheduling this a day earlier to remind you all and myself about the Moon Day tomorow!

Happy moon day to all who celebrate

This is your reminder to prep for Moon Day on July 20th.

MOON DAY MONDAY THIS MONTH NOT A DRILL!!!!!

when all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail. when all you have is a paintbrush, everything looks like a canvas. when all you have is a cock, everything looks like the exhaust pipe of a 2014 honda civic. so yes, to answer your question, i am stuck. please call the emergency services

[Image description: a tag which says #when all you have is a cylinder all your problems look like m&m minis tubes]

Puthykraken got dithintegrated by the dithcourthe

Bloopers are movie aftercare and it’s fucked up that we got rid of them