ERIC'S EDUCATION

 “Today’s a special day, Eric.”

 “...I know that this day is the anniversary of... Him and all. When everything truly started.”

 “Well, yes. I am barely surprised that you remember. But, there’s something else.     I found him.”

 “...Yes?” He said, softly.

  “It’s almost been a year. While I am confident that... Mistake is gone, something may occur. Therefore, if he ever appears again... You know what to do. I am confident that you will not betray me with said weapon, but trust my words. Any harm towards me will have terrible consequences. Understand?” The god spoke, bluntly, watching Eric’s silent nod.

[ Release ] him from prison. Both the one he’d stayed, and the body he’d lived in. His head crunched more and more in, and those eyes were eventually forced into rest.

He’d wanted happiness, and out of twenty two years of life, he’d gotten only eight days of it. Then, he was gone.

His body deteriorated as what was something, a mockery of life, stopped its clock and said that was enough for its run. He broke down, his greens and pale browns and blues to become something else. It drifted upwards and out through the ceiling.

And he was dead, leaving all the things he’d eaten behind. 

 Hey remember when Baldi ate an entire lake. And dirt.

 Well, that was heading right towards him.

 There wasn’t a moment of a respite, as Eric was flung out of his classroom by the spurt of water and other objects as Eric eventually was spat right out of his school by the mixture of water and dirt, skidding on the grass as he passed out from all of it.

  “...”

 Silence filled the area as everything eventually settled down. Two red shoes eventually walked to Eric’s side, as there was a pause.

 “...You did it.” Schoolhouse’s voice was devoid of emotion. “I’ll clean up this mess for you. You did great.”

 With that, the damage was gone, along with Schoolhouse. He had to catch up on some teaching. Eric was put inside, slumped over on his chair with his glasses back on his desk.

“…”

[ It ] was so ungodly horrible. Why couldn’t have this happened earlier. It was nicer to never have something than to have it then get it taken away. He’d grasped onto true happiness for maybe one day. Even when he was free earlier this year, that was happiness with known limit and guilt.

The immoral mortal god didn’t bother to say anything, but by the way his one bigger half was still looking around, and then focusing and making eyecontact with Eric, he was still alive.

His eyes were disappointed and hollowly accepting. If he couldn’t have freedom in life, it was better that he just died. It was pointless to stay it off. He’d prefer it much more than to be thrown back into jail.

   He feels his cyan blood on his chest as he stares down at the others eyes. Those eyes that stared him down. Always. He felt like a knight, pitying the beast that had tormented it and those who it had loved. Was he still too soft? Even after all of this? He was unsure.

 He had to put Baldi out of his misery. He assumed that given time, Baldi might be able to put himself together, but that would just leave others suffering. So, he raised his ruler again.

 “I... I don’t know what happens after death. But I hope that happiness somehow finds you after it, Baldi. Goodbye. I’m sorry that I had to be the one to release you, then kill you.”

[ Oh ] .

Color him surprised. Color him not even pale, not faltering as his lips were cut.. And his body was split into two pieces; the line differentiating them being vertical. His mouth was slashed alongside his body, and fell uselessly to the floor like two red ribbons. The monster didn’t feel it, he felt no pain, but he knew it was something he didn’t exactly prefer compared to what he had.

He knew he was part mortal, capable of death. And this seems like something that’d be capable of killing him.

So he’d stumbled aback for a moment. The line between his halves seemingly invisible for a moment before his right side flopped over, completely detaching itself and falling to the floor. The man seemed fine on his left side, still there standing up because the cut hadn’t been fully down as to seperate his legs as well.

Unequal, he stepped back, then collapsed, his shrunken pupil enlarging back to something more relaxed looking.

“Mh.”

The remnant of his split mouth tried to say something, but it came out as nothing.

. . .

 What had he done. Oh god. Oh god, no. He stumbled back, the ruler still gripped in his hand as he watched the remains of Baldi collapse. He was still alive. Why was he still alive. He felt sick in more ways than one. He thought that some sort of revenge would feel good, but to him? This was terrible.

 He never wanted revenge. Just closure.

 “Oh- Oh my god, I...” His voice became meek again, as a few frightened tears fell down his face. “I.... I never wanted this, oh my god...” He’s half expecting the founder to crawl out of the remains once he was done, and he really didn’t want to see that. Regret fell upon Eric’s face. He didn’t feel bad for Baldi because, well. He hurt him and a few others for twenty-two years, but just. This whole situation, honestly. Maybe Baldi could’ve been a better person if Schoolhouse wasn’t so cold towards him. He hesitantly approached Baldi, staring at the pieces of him on the ground.

“…”

[ He ] was close enough to Eric like this. He had a complete disregard for himself. He felt no fear, no pain, and he was fully confident. Why would he doubt himself after what he’d eaten? What he’d consumed?

This was fun.

But it’s ending now.

So, he opened his mouth. Wider. Wider, to do unto Eric the same fate he’d given Schoolhouse. 

  “A-A-Ah . . .” Was all that he managed to say as the other attempted to consume him. He couldn’t imagine what it was like for Schoolhouse. He didn’t want anyone else to have to go through such... A disgusting thing. Eric shut his eyes tight.

 “Baldi, you are--”

 With all of his might, he took the ruler that was stabbed through Baldi and sliced it upwards, in a very harsh attempt to cut the others lips in half. Wipe that stupid look off of his face, quite literally.

[ He ] just backed up from the assault, retreating his plan to grab the ruler until he could. Then Baldi went in, assuming he’d be fine when he believed Eric to have been slowing. Giving into mortal weakness.

But because Baldi was mortal..  He was bound to overstep.

To make a mistake.

Which he did.

And he’d been stabbed. 

This could work to his advantage, all he’d have to do was overpower Eric’s grip, rip it out of himself, and beat the child senselessly. Which he’d be doing, at least trying, starting now.

  “...”

 He seemed... Shocked when he actually stabbed the other. Like he snapped right out of that anger and realized what he had done. Oh god, what was he doing? Why did founder put all of his eggs into one basket like this? Was this another test? He was unsure, as he quickly did his best to fight back against the other, and actually plunge the ruler deeper into him.

 He was no longer a sniveling child who was too afraid to run in the halls, he was a man.

[ Mutually ] assured destruction. His swipe hit, but so did Eric’s. Both cut just as deep as the other, but one maybe bled and the other didn’t. Inside of Baldi’s body was nothing. Blackness, just like his mouth.

And with Eric’s swipe against his form, the boy had torn a slight hole in that thing that was his form to peel away what waited to be never seen underneath. And he felt no pain, but he did heed Eric’s cry and get back. Simply to look at himself.

“You really don’t know how to use that thing. You’re very amateurish, Eric, but it’s a learning process. Hand it over, and I’ll show you how to really use it.”

Now he’s going to grab that ruler.

   Eric was not a fighter. It just wasn’t in his character.

 If he was Emma, he would’ve stabbed Baldi at least five times by now. Neon blue blood seeped out of the wound that was high up on his chest, as he grit his teeth. At the very least, he knew the ruler had some effect on him. 

 Those words though. That damn voice of Baldis. It simply angered him. So many times had he tried talking to Baldi, asking him why and how. So many simple questions only returned with a blank stare, and more pain and suffering for him and his best friend.

 He was done. He was done with being nice. He gripped the ruler, with angry tears in his eyes and blood dripping down his shirt. He wasn’t going to let Baldi have this. He wasn’t going to let Baldi do this to other people.

  “You hurt so many people --” A step back. “You hurt me, Emma, the Principal... And so many more people. There is no excuse for that, you only care for yourself.” His words had a very angry, violent edge to them. He was gripping the ruler so hard that it almost hurt him. “I-I’m going to stop this. I’m going to kill you, Baldi. I’m going to kill you.”

[ So ] that’s how it is, then. A ruler. Tool of math, tool of holy crusade, to be turned against him. Metal.. Much more stable than the wooden one he had, and very shiny. He’ll have to restrain himself from eating the ruler with Eric. After he’s gotten a couple nice swipes in, of course.

Things bleeding, dripping, secreting material.. True show of pain. Of pain, shameless pain that couldn’t be denied. Yes, he’d love that. He would love that. He’ll do that.

“Irony at its finest with that ruler.”

And within seconds, Baldi’d traversed between the desks and was upon Eric, going to scratch.

  Terror gripped at him in that moment. Everything seemed to go in slowmotion. 

 He remembered. Every time that blast of static interrupted his senses as Baldi smacked that ruler against him, sending him into nothingness. Every time. Every single time. It all happened at once. He raised the ruler, holding it as if he didn’t even want to hold it, as he cried out, swiping at the other. Specifically, at the others chest.

Lesley sniffled and kneeled down. “I really must be losing it…I just—“ He sighs and looks down. “I can’t tell what’s real anymore. Hell, I can’t even tell if THIS is really happening right now!” He laughed out of nervousness, patting one of the crows on the head to relax himself.

“I feel like it’s only going to get worse from here. I’ve hurt someone innocent…Gods don’t bleed. And they don’t scream either…” He shuddered. “Not like he did.” He scratched the crow’s head gently, starting to relax more.

  The crow tilts his head at the other as it’s patted, letting out another ‘caw’. The main one let out a weird sighing noise, before it shook his head. This was certainly real.

[ … ]

“I know I am a terrible, horrendous being, at least the way you think I am, and I revel in it. What did you hope to accomplish with this? Provoke me into consuming you like the abomination god you worship? Because if that’s what your motive behind your monologue is, I’m willing to indulge you. Maybe you’ll meet him inside the void of stomach acid I contain. Then you two can relax in there while I truly relish in eternal freedom and happiness.”

Eternal freedom, eternal freedom. Beautiful freedom, beautiful life, beautiful happiness. Everything he’d want and more, it charmed him. It truly did, and he wanted to keep it for himself. If Eric wanted to even try to get in the way of that, he’d just eat him.

  “Actually, no, Baldi. I rather not be eaten by your dirt riddled mouth.” Eugh. It gave him the heebie-jeebies just thinking about that. He huffs. “I don’t worship Schoolhouse, Baldi. He helped me and Emma. He helped me become a teacher. He helped us to the best of his ability to get over the stuff you’ve done to us. I don’t see you doing any good wills to warrant me calling you a god, Baldi.”

 Eric rubs his temples.

 “Sorry, but from what I’ve seen? I can’t let you be free. I don’t want to deny happiness from anyone, but your happiness means suffering for others, so. Sorry about this. I’m not a violent person, but I guess I have to play the hero. For once.”

 With that, he opens the lid to the blue box, and out of all things-- 

Principal had a giant lump inside his throat. He saw Baldimore, he FELT him grab him. He heard that sickly voice croak into his ears. That had to have been him. It had to…

…Oh god.

“I…I didn’t realize I was—He just attacked me, I just—I just—“ Black tears welled up in Lesley’s eyes, making him breathe heavily.

“Emma, I’m so sorry. I’m sorry you had to see it, I can’t believe I’ve done this…” He hiccups and sobs, his claws growing down into his normal sharp nails again. He leaned against a bathroom stall wall and shook his head. “I’m a monster…”

  “Hey, now.”

 The leader hopped onto a sink, its feathers ruffling up.

“I ate him.”

[ His ] claws flex slightly, preemptively, expecting something. Even from his student, his passing student, he couldn’t not expect something with a question like that.

“Is there a problem? Would you like to solve it with me?”

As much as he legitimately respected Eric, he couldn’t trust him if he was showing concern for the hedgehog. No, not at all. It was broken right then and there, with that one simple question.

Talk about an easy betrayal.

  “...I would be disgusted, but honestly, coming from you, I’m not surprised.”

 There’s a sigh. He had no choice, then. No wiggle room for being nice. He literally ate a god, and that could cause trouble. He glances at the blue box for a moment, before sucking in some air through his teeth.

 “Baldi... Why did you come here? To thank me? Because I don’t want to hear that from you. Did you want to show off how much you got revenge on Schoolhouse? Whoo. You did it. You just kinda. Proved his point that you should be locked up and all.”

 Hoo. Going in hard, there.

Okay. Now Principal was certain he had lost it. “S-Something stupid? What do you—“ He looked down at his blood soaked sweater sleeve. Looks like he blacked out during his attack.

“Oh god…oh god, oh no….” He started to tremble. “That isn’t good at all, not at—“ Wait. Hadn’t he heard that voice before? “…Emma?” He turned his attention back to the leader, his face still stained with blackened tears and snot (yes, it’s snot).

  “Yes, yes, it’s me. Hold your applause--” A pause, as the crow stares at the ground. “Well, not me, me. I’m using my crows to communicate, because I really don’t want to be sent do detention again. Also I want to stay. Out of this blast zone. I have enough to deal with.”

 That’s avoiding detention in the halls, Emma.

 “But you’re being stupid, Principal? The &%$#head that we know as Baldimore? He’s no longer your issue. You just hurt a possibly innocent noodle right there. I saw it with my crows eyes.” It blinks for emphasis, “Look. I’m not good with this sweettalk stuff. Eric is, and he’s busy. So, I’ll just say. Those twenty two years are over, pally. Let it go. I cope by eating gallons of ice cream, and you don’t see me complainin!”

Principal suddenly stopped and just. stared at the crows. Either he was REALLY out of it, or those crows just talked. “…Pardon?” Wow. He’s talking to a group of crows right now. Like, actually talking to them. He was still very on edge, so he dared not move from his spot.

  “Of course they’re talking, idiot.” A very feminine voice emanated from the leader. “Crows are smart, you know. Sheesh, you really got $*&#ed up since the last time I saw you, huh?”

 The leader hopped closer to the principal, its white eyes staring at him as its beak moved in an odd manner. 

 The crow stares for a moment, before it opens its beak, its voice... Sounding very familiar.