Undertale Deltarune Capcom Gothic Vampire Lover

Call me Nighten or Obsidian. I'm 22, Nonbiray, & Autistic. So you will probley see me rambling or sometimes reapet at times not knowning it.

If you are a Undertale/Deltarune, Mega Man, or Capcom fan then this is the blog for you. I'm always welcome to see another fan of these series. Also I wouldnt mind people sending me asks and questions about the stuff that I like, so feel free to send a ask anytime but only keep it to asks because I wont answer to DMs.

To just hear me rambling to myself go through the #night's thoughts tag in my blog.

Fandoms Im In:

- Undertale/Deltarune

- Capcom Videogames

- Mega Man

- Resident Evil (7/Village)

- Devil May Cry (GAMES/2007 ANIME ONLY)

- Ace Attorney

- Street Fighter

- DC Comics (Batman/DCAU/Teen Titans)

- Castlevania (Anime/Games)

Ever since I fully completed highschool and got a job for the first time it has affected me because out of my two brothers I was the only one that passed, after that I was afried to let anyone down because I felt I was going to fail everyone and im only one thats full on working all the time.

But I was going well working and loving it, until I lost my job and my mental state as a whole was at my deepest and I was most depressed. After that I was becoming way more agressive; yelling at others and being really rude. And since I wasnt earning money anymore I had to use my own savings to pay for the groserces and other bills, but my money was going down more and more after that. All my hard work dissapering and it wasnt helpping that everytime I tried applying for a place to work I was turned down. I was getting worse and worse......... that I was having thoughts of self harm or being suicidel......

But I cannot thank my Manager at my old workplace I used to work at was able to put in my resume at the new workplace he was transferd to and I got a job there working again. I only just met him for the first time when I started working but I always enjoyed talking to him, I can always call him a good friend.

Im doing way better ever since I started working but im still not mentally well. Ive always been a very positve person that always tries to ignore or block out negitive stuff but what I truley felt down inside was I was depressed and scared. I have been having nightmares that have truley affected me and wont leave my head/mind, my own family taking their own lives and I know they would never do that but it wont leave my mind. I also hate the fact that I keep repeting myself on topics and negitive stuff to my family but I cant stop because its the curse of being Autsitic. I hate that I keep bringing up negitive subjets and I want to fully stop.

There are so so many times I want to just full on let it all out and cry, but now I cant even cry because when I was more open to do that I was going through such a cringe phase in my life I wish to block out. I know that sounds dumb but its the reason why I cannot cry. There are even times still in my mind where im thinking of self harming myself, thankfully theres no way in hell I would do that. But its starting to get to me really badly that I dont know how long I can keep denaying that.