Tf!water and tf!avid are such interesting contrasts to tf!marm. Tf!marm's whole thing is the idea that kindness is a choice. Not something that necessarily comes automatically or is easy. But a choice that everyone could make and should want to make. The world is not inherently good or evil but it has the potential to be good. We just have to choose to fight for it.
tf!avid, based on the stream where they destroyed the mask and other people's character analyses I've seen, seems to be naturally incredibly forgiving. They use their diary to remind themselves why they shouldn't forgive people. He chooses not to be kind by forgiving others. Because the things they've done are too terrible to forgive. Because someone who has all the power and the will to harm others is too dangerous to forgive.
One of the things I love most about tf!water is that no matter how many thorny walls they throw up around themself to keep others away, his kindness keeps leaking through. If you take a sad and hurt character and dangle them in front of tf!water, he will eventually give in and start trying to help them, no matter how hard he tries to resist. They will feed them, protect them, be emotionally supportive, etc. He is incredibly kind and caring, but he chooses to be cold and cruel to keep himself from being abandoned or attacked by others.
It's not that tf!avid and tf!water are not choosing to be kind, they are choosing not to be kind. Because the world has shown them over and over again that being kind is dangerous. Because others will choose not to be kind.
tf!marm also is not some perfect saint of goodness. Nor is she completely naive to the dangers of the world. She doesn't choose to be kind just because she is kind, but because she's desperate. She needs the world to have the potential to be good because what else is ther. If the world is horrible and there's no reason have hope and keep trying, what's the point? She chooses to have hope and be kind because she is desperate for hope and kindness. Sometimes she's even so desperate that it makes her not only naive but unkind and unempathetic. Like when she projects her own need for the parents who abandoned her to not be terrible people, on tf!avid. Completely ignoring the horrible things he told her they did.
Combined, I think the overarching theme here is that the world and people are too complex to always treat everything and everyone the same. Sometimes hurt people hurt people. Sometimes forgiving and/or pushing someone to be better can make them better. Sometimes people just hurt people, and not fighting them would be unkind to those they hurt. Sometimes assuming good intentions from everyone can lead to them taking advantage of and hurting you. Sometimes no one wanted to hurt anyone and it was all just a misunderstanding. Kindness is a choice and it's not an easy choice. Not just because it takes hard work to be kind. Often, kind acts can even be the easiest and most natural to perform. But because it can often be difficult to know how to be most kind to everyone, including yourself, at the same time.
