Natsumi's Trashcan🐥

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Index because this post ended up incredibly long so here are the parts laid out to read anything you’re interested in!

> Part 1: Introduction

(How did I learn about this game?)

> Part 2: Contact

(Getting the game)

> Part 3: The Beginning

(Starting the game and first impressions lol)

> Part 4: Falling

(FOR LUKE AHAH)

> Interlude: Luke Pearce’s Fear

> Part 5: Obsession

(How and why did this obsession start?)

> Part 6: Reflection

(Thinking back on Luke’s personality that attracted me)

> The end: Memories

(Extra memorable moments)

______________________________

Part 1: Introduction

I play Genshin (shocker) and I have some online friends who play it as well, so when Tears of Themis came out globally since it's made by Hoyoverse as well, most people who played genshin went to check it out. I discovered Tears of Themis through those people, and I was recommended the game by my online friends.

What was my response?

“I have no phone storage.” AAHAHAH, yes. I'm not a day one player. I only started during the second anniversary because back when the game came out despite being interested I could not play because I did not have any device that could handle the game. My phone could not handle Genshin's size either, it's not compatible to begin with- I played Genshin on the PlayStation [emoji]

However I did not forget about the game, I was just hoping that somehow one day, a miracle will happen and I will be able to play mobile games like other people LOL but what are the odds of that happening?... Well, a miracle happened 2 years later.

Bonus: I had a little beef at the time with Artem because I kept thinking drawings of him were actually of Jumin who is a very well written character I love like crazy from mystic messenger since 2016 BWAHAHA

Every masterpiece.. has its cheap copy.. IM JKJK PUT THAT KNIFE DOWN AHAHA

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Part 2: Contact

So one day I was visiting my aunt's house and met my cousin's acquaintance. I met the guy for like.. only 2 hours and during those hours my cousin told him about how I draw digitally but I have been drawing on an 8 year old phone that stays alive for like 30 mins at a time AHHAHA

The guy was like “That's it, I'm getting you an iPad to draw on.” I laughed, thinking he was joking- but then 2 days later I received TWO iPads, one for me and one for my little sister! W t f. Angels do exist on earth? And I was never able to thank him in person because he's a busy guy who only visited my village and I never saw him again o.o

Can you guess what I started doing when I got it? Download a bunch of games I wanted to try throughout the years but couldn't! Among them was Tears of Themis. My house didn't have the best Internet and had a couple hours of electricity a day so I downloaded it very slowly at my aunt's house.

I remember so clearly about how I sat next to my sister as I was downloading the game, and it started playing the second anniversary promotion video since it was starting during that time. At first I was like “aww, they proposing!” but suddenly things turned spicy and I almost dropped the iPad from my hand HAHA.

I did not know what to expect going into this game because I stayed away from spoilers and videos about it since I knew I wanted to get into it myself one day (I was interested in the main story). It made me sad too to be honest because I wanted to play it but couldn't, so I avoided it for years.

I however, did not expect at all that the game would get THAT spicy LMAO my sister noticed my reaction and she was like “What's up?” And I was like “you cannot see this” though she is older than the game’s age rating AHAHHA

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Part 3: The beginning

I was so excited getting into this game! When I started I was incredibly hooked to the main story, and at the time.. hear this.. I had a bias towards Artem because he looked like Jumin AHAHA

I was honestly more interested though in the main story than the boys, because the boys didn't make me feel much at the time- I do not have a “love at first sight” I never had that kind of experience for real life people or fictional people. (Anyone can experience it, and that's valid! It's just for me personally that never happens.)

After knowing characters and learning more about them, that's when sometimes- I fall in love with them as a character, they end up giving me so much happiness just seeing them, they give me comfort.. And they fill up my sketchbooks HAHA is this love romantic? Usually no, that's very rare!

I did not feel much for Artem (turns out the only thing he and Jumin have in common were their looks and being socially awkward, shocker-) but I had a little interest that led to me pulling for his second anniversary card when I started being able to wish. I lost- and got a standard Artem, but then I won and got his card LMAO you can get a lot of wishes starting off. However I was doing the stories of the standard SRs, along with the main story and someone.. someone was warming up a lot to my heart.

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Part 4: Falling

The boys were all very interesting and lovely characters! (The NPCs as well!!)

Artem, despite how he comes off at work, is actually just a shy guy who is bad at communication outside of work.

Vyn is actually a very interesting and well written character being very different than the rest of the cast due to his unique upbringing (honestly? His family feels like a cult, bro literally is running from a cult) and you learn more about his own psychology the more you get to know him.

Marius is literally just an artist who wants to chase the life he wants but is hindered by responsibility and his position.

And Luke- Luke stole my heart LOL

First off, he's a detective and I've already confessed online to having a thing for detectives by a drawing- that starting since I was a kid and I watched detective conan🧍‍♀️his introduction chapter.. was very interesting. It was literally the first episode, Rosa clearly knows and cares about this character right off the bat you're like hmm? What was this guy doing for 8 years? Why did he show up now after so long? Almost making him suspicious even. But he and Rosa seemed so close despite it all.

After that Luke had started showing up in the story here and there, a moment that made me go “ohh.. what a cool guy.” Was when after Marius’ case in episode 2, he shows up on a bike like “get in we outta here” and saved her from all the reporters.

His theme plays at this scene.. my heartttt

Revealing he'd been watching her and the case from afar and was literally waiting for her to get out and get her away.

I started reading the standard SRs, the first one I did was “Among the great blue” which honestly I recommend everyone doing again because I bet you all do not remember Luke saying this about Jellyfish

The card made me go *the rock eyebrow raise* GAHAH and at the time I was all innocent, not knowing anything about what Luke was going through, so when Rosa woke up and did not find him sleeping next to her (after she invaded where he's supposed to be sleeping lmao) and Luke was hunched over like “I'm fine I just accidentally swallowed gum lol” I actually believed him 💀 there were signs, but it would fly over a player's head until things are revealed ON THE FIRST FREAKING ACT OF HIS PERSONAL STORY and suddenly everything makes sense. Wow.

When I started personal story, I was just starting it because starting all of them is part of the “Rookie tasks” event you get when you start the game. Only to be punched in the gut immediately.

This is LITERALLY what you’re greeted with when you start his story 💀

I was starting to warm up to this guy and you're telling me.. he's sick and planning to leave us.. omg.

I got to choose one limited SR from the Rookie event, and I thought Luke looked adorable so I picked his card "A star in the palm" and the story.. omg that card, I'm weak. Everyone needs to see it, READ IT!

It’s illegal to be BOTH handsome and adorable smh

After that I started WANTING to do more Luke stories so I did the other standard SRs “Radiant Sunlight”, “Timely Rescue”, “Inner Sanctum”. They were all so good, my favorite being Inner Sanctum for how much it messed with my heart.

Dude is literally falling and he STILL makes sure to protect her.

I- was dying. I started pulling for Luke's anniversary card, starting to regret my choice going for Artem's. But he wouldn't come-

So I went back to main story because that's how you get the most schips, and guess what- I had reached episode 5…

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Interlude: Luke Pearce’s Fear

The way episode 5 starts, Luke joins the NXX and Rosa is incredibly surprised seeing him there introducing himself as an agent from the NSB. Meanwhile Luke… is mad.

At first he can't believe Artem would even make her do this but she confirms to him that it was her decision, and then he spills the truth about his identity, and about where he's been the past 8 years. He apologizes, for lying, for planning to leave her again, for everything.

And then this happens.

You guys, this scene made me go straight up insane. You can tell how much he had cared and loved her for all these years, and how his biggest fear is literally the main character getting hurt or something happening to her. I felt so emotional over it, that after this act I started DESPERATELY pulling for his card and I finally- finally got it

Episode 5 BTW is one of my favorites in the main story, it is 3 parts because it's THAT good. It's when people will start seeing what Luke is as a character, what's beneath the surface you see in episode 1. (Also this episode introduced the best character: Hugh Moss AHAHH)

The parallel between Rosa, and Jasmine (the reporter whose case you investigate), was not lost on me. That reporter died trying to expose the truth which is exactly what Rosa has been trying to do. I think the entire chapter literally is showing you why Luke is so scared of her continuing the path she's in.

But you know what's the best part? He's freaking terrified, yet he never forces her to leave. He says this:

People keep saying Luke is a red flag that keeps trying to control Rosa and her actions and I swear my reaction is always “Are you even paying attention?” Luke never forces Rosa, he only shows he's against it, but he always says he will support her whatever decision she makes.

A similar more light-hearted situation is the story of his summer card “Iridescent Heartbeat” where Luke is afraid of Rosa getting hurt or doing things that are too much for her so he doesn't consider doing things such as Bungee jumping or rafting. But Rosa insists that she wants to do it and when she's visibly afraid later, Luke teases her a bit (LOL)

but then holds her close to him and soothes her saying there's nothing to be afraid of cause he's there.

He encourages her to do what she wants! And when she does indeed get hurt because the rope was too tight around her leg, he does NOT put the blame on her, but on himself-

Y'ALL HOW IS THIS GUY CONTROLLING??

(The scene after kinda got on my nerves cause Rosa got “angry” that he’s not his usual “cheerful self” like girl I love you but please- can’t you see how much you getting hurt affects him? She pretends that she’s angrier than she actually is making Luke apologize over and over like 💀 but tbh it was also funny, I don’t like how she handled it but it was funny lol)

When they go rafting Luke lets Rosa take the lead and he will follow her because she wanted to prove to him that he doesn't need to plan everything, however Rosa's plan backfires, things go horribly wrong and she can't figure out how to get the raft to go straight. Luke again, does not reprimand her in any way and only helps her so she can do what she wants. Later on even after they've fallen off the raft and onto the water he immediately holds her and takes her up to the surface so worried like “are you okay???” And despite all that, he says she's right. That she's always right and he will stop trying to plan and go more with the flow. 

Luke never tried to control Rosa, he just loves her so much that he does not want to ever see her in pain or sad. He wants her to be the happiest girl in the world.

So who is Luke? Luke is the coolest mf, a guy that always jumps into action to help others with a heart so damn big that his own emotions slowly destroy him. He has felt an astronomical amount of guilt and regret since childhood- and has cared for and loved the main character just as long. The girl who is the reason he was able to keep his sanity, the girl who he always wanted to protect, and the girl who is the reason he is still here today. 

I wholeheartedly believe that without Rosa in his life, Luke would've ended up completely different, if still alive at all.

Bonus: I remember people being like, the characters have gemstones that match their color in the proposal ring, so why does Luke have Ruby instead of something like Topaz? This is why.. the ruby in the ring represents Rosa (getting emotional over here omg) and honestly that ring is freaking insane because not only did he design and make it and its box by himself for years.. but a ruby is inside the key that Rosa gave to him.

Remember how Luke when you click on the key in visit says “I wear it like this to have it as close as possible to my heart” now look at the key.. if the Ruby is Rosa, and Luke’s heart is the key, do you see what he conveyed in that ring? Yea, I’m crying too. 

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Part 5: Obsession

I have a bit of an obsession problem, I've been obsessed with stories, games, or characters and that obsession can last years of my lifetime. And it's understandable, when you're going through terrible things in your life, you get attached to what makes you feel happy and you hold on to that feeling. That's what starts that obsession.

When I got the second anniversary Artem card I did the story immediately and it was.. it was alright. Artem wants to propose, but in his attempt to keep it all secret distances himself too much and gets Rosa worried, but then wow! He proposes with the help of his coworkers and happy ending + things get a bit spicy at the end. 

But I felt like.. like I'm getting deja vu AHAHA like I've seen this kind of story a million times before. (Probably cause I did from watching a bunch of kdramas and having consumed a bunch of stories from a lot of media) It did not exactly get me to feel anything much, I'm sure it's different for Artem stans though having him propose after probably following his story for 2 years XD good on you guys have fun with your mans! 

For me though who had just started, it did not have that much of an effect. After I got the Luke anniversary card I was excited and went into the story oh so innocently not knowing back then that Luke cards are honestly heart wrenching. 

It led to me crying in bed while the sun was rising from the window as Luke says “That's because I love you.”

The way how he blocks the wind from her and lets it hit him instead at that exact moment is freaking PEAK writing.

That card showed me a lot more about this man who is so shackled by his own emotions and circumstance, that he's willing to sacrifice everything even his own wants and dreams for the one he loves.

Have you guys seen that one official art with Rosa posing as Themis? And the boys are represented by the objects around her? Luke is the sword, Artem is the balance, Vyn is the blindfold, and Marius is the snake by her leg.

It starts to make sense why Luke is holding onto her sword to the point of bleeding, he's bleeding yet he looks up to her in absolute devotion not caring for what happens to him and his eyes are only always on her. He’s willing to be her sword, to take all of the pain and protect her so she can be happy.

My life.. has not been what is considered “normal”. I'm not going to give my backstory in this post aHAHAH but at the time when I started Tears of Themis I was going through a very bad point in my life where I was close to have given up completely on my future and accepted my fate as it is. I had shut down completely, and I went back to becoming a shut-in which is honestly something I went through for four years before, it wasn't good. 

When you reach that point, you start becoming apathetic to everything.

Luke however, somehow started making me start having emotions again. Reading and learning about this character was actually affecting me in a way I have not been affected in a long time. He felt.. real, like I could feel his emotions, his love, his despair.

And that's part of why I got so attached to him and he became my comfort, because of him, I started to feel human again.

AHA CRINGE. OK enough with the sadness.

But I'll never forget how much Luke and Tears of Themis helped me keep a grip during those hard months. I'm in a better place now, it's not good- but it's better, and I still just open this game and visit Luke to help me ground myself.

One time after a bad day I accidentally touched him and he said this, I went insane-

I think that says a lot about the state of my sanity AHAHAH 

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Index because this post ended up incredibly long so here are the parts laid out to read anything you’re interested in!

> Part 1: Introduction

(How did I learn about this game?)

> Part 2: Contact

(Getting the game)

> Part 3: The Beginning

(Starting the game and first impressions lol)

> Part 4: Falling

(FOR LUKE AHAH)

> Interlude: Luke Pearce’s Fear

> Part 5: Obsession

(How and why did this obsession start?)

> Part 6: Reflection

(Thinking back on Luke’s personality that attracted me)

> The end: Memories

(Extra memorable moments)

______________________________

Part 1: Introduction

I play Genshin (shocker) and I have some online friends who play it as well, so when Tears of Themis came out globally since it's made by Hoyoverse as well, most people who played genshin went to check it out. I discovered Tears of Themis through those people, and I was recommended the game by my online friends.

What was my response?

“I have no phone storage.” AAHAHAH, yes. I'm not a day one player. I only started during the second anniversary because back when the game came out despite being interested I could not play because I did not have any device that could handle the game. My phone could not handle Genshin's size either, it's not compatible to begin with- I played Genshin on the PlayStation [emoji]

However I did not forget about the game, I was just hoping that somehow one day, a miracle will happen and I will be able to play mobile games like other people LOL but what are the odds of that happening?... Well, a miracle happened 2 years later.

Bonus: I had a little beef at the time with Artem because I kept thinking drawings of him were actually of Jumin who is a very well written character I love like crazy from mystic messenger since 2016 BWAHAHA

Every masterpiece.. has its cheap copy.. IM JKJK PUT THAT KNIFE DOWN AHAHA

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Part 2: Contact

So one day I was visiting my aunt's house and met my cousin's acquaintance. I met the guy for like.. only 2 hours and during those hours my cousin told him about how I draw digitally but I have been drawing on an 8 year old phone that stays alive for like 30 mins at a time AHHAHA

The guy was like “That's it, I'm getting you an iPad to draw on.” I laughed, thinking he was joking- but then 2 days later I received TWO iPads, one for me and one for my little sister! W t f. Angels do exist on earth? And I was never able to thank him in person because he's a busy guy who only visited my village and I never saw him again o.o

Can you guess what I started doing when I got it? Download a bunch of games I wanted to try throughout the years but couldn't! Among them was Tears of Themis. My house didn't have the best Internet and had a couple hours of electricity a day so I downloaded it very slowly at my aunt's house.

I remember so clearly about how I sat next to my sister as I was downloading the game, and it started playing the second anniversary promotion video since it was starting during that time. At first I was like “aww, they proposing!” but suddenly things turned spicy and I almost dropped the iPad from my hand HAHA.

I did not know what to expect going into this game because I stayed away from spoilers and videos about it since I knew I wanted to get into it myself one day (I was interested in the main story). It made me sad too to be honest because I wanted to play it but couldn't, so I avoided it for years.

I however, did not expect at all that the game would get THAT spicy LMAO my sister noticed my reaction and she was like “What's up?” And I was like “you cannot see this” though she is older than the game’s age rating AHAHHA

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Part 3: The beginning

I was so excited getting into this game! When I started I was incredibly hooked to the main story, and at the time.. hear this.. I had a bias towards Artem because he looked like Jumin AHAHA

I was honestly more interested though in the main story than the boys, because the boys didn't make me feel much at the time- I do not have a “love at first sight” I never had that kind of experience for real life people or fictional people. (Anyone can experience it, and that's valid! It's just for me personally that never happens.)

After knowing characters and learning more about them, that's when sometimes- I fall in love with them as a character, they end up giving me so much happiness just seeing them, they give me comfort.. And they fill up my sketchbooks HAHA is this love romantic? Usually no, that's very rare!

I did not feel much for Artem (turns out the only thing he and Jumin have in common were their looks and being socially awkward, shocker-) but I had a little interest that led to me pulling for his second anniversary card when I started being able to wish. I lost- and got a standard Artem, but then I won and got his card LMAO you can get a lot of wishes starting off. However I was doing the stories of the standard SRs, along with the main story and someone.. someone was warming up a lot to my heart.

______________________________

Part 4: Falling

The boys were all very interesting and lovely characters! (The NPCs as well!!)

Artem, despite how he comes off at work, is actually just a shy guy who is bad at communication outside of work.

Vyn is actually a very interesting and well written character being very different than the rest of the cast due to his unique upbringing (honestly? His family feels like a cult, bro literally is running from a cult) and you learn more about his own psychology the more you get to know him.

Marius is literally just an artist who wants to chase the life he wants but is hindered by responsibility and his position.

And Luke- Luke stole my heart LOL

First off, he's a detective and I've already confessed online to having a thing for detectives by a drawing- that starting since I was a kid and I watched detective conan🧍‍♀️his introduction chapter.. was very interesting. It was literally the first episode, Rosa clearly knows and cares about this character right off the bat you're like hmm? What was this guy doing for 8 years? Why did he show up now after so long? Almost making him suspicious even. But he and Rosa seemed so close despite it all.

After that Luke had started showing up in the story here and there, a moment that made me go “ohh.. what a cool guy.” Was when after Marius’ case in episode 2, he shows up on a bike like “get in we outta here” and saved her from all the reporters.

His theme plays at this scene.. my heartttt

Revealing he'd been watching her and the case from afar and was literally waiting for her to get out and get her away.

I started reading the standard SRs, the first one I did was “Among the great blue” which honestly I recommend everyone doing again because I bet you all do not remember Luke saying this about Jellyfish

The card made me go *the rock eyebrow raise* GAHAH and at the time I was all innocent, not knowing anything about what Luke was going through, so when Rosa woke up and did not find him sleeping next to her (after she invaded where he's supposed to be sleeping lmao) and Luke was hunched over like “I'm fine I just accidentally swallowed gum lol” I actually believed him 💀 there were signs, but it would fly over a player's head until things are revealed ON THE FIRST FREAKING ACT OF HIS PERSONAL STORY and suddenly everything makes sense. Wow.

When I started personal story, I was just starting it because starting all of them is part of the “Rookie tasks” event you get when you start the game. Only to be punched in the gut immediately.

This is LITERALLY what you’re greeted with when you start his story 💀

I was starting to warm up to this guy and you're telling me.. he's sick and planning to leave us.. omg.

I got to choose one limited SR from the Rookie event, and I thought Luke looked adorable so I picked his card "A star in the palm" and the story.. omg that card, I'm weak. Everyone needs to see it, READ IT!

It’s illegal to be BOTH handsome and adorable smh

After that I started WANTING to do more Luke stories so I did the other standard SRs “Radiant Sunlight”, “Timely Rescue”, “Inner Sanctum”. They were all so good, my favorite being Inner Sanctum for how much it messed with my heart.

Dude is literally falling and he STILL makes sure to protect her.

I- was dying. I started pulling for Luke's anniversary card, starting to regret my choice going for Artem's. But he wouldn't come-

So I went back to main story because that's how you get the most schips, and guess what- I had reached episode 5…

______________________________

Interlude: Luke Pearce’s Fear

The way episode 5 starts, Luke joins the NXX and Rosa is incredibly surprised seeing him there introducing himself as an agent from the NSB. Meanwhile Luke… is mad.

At first he can't believe Artem would even make her do this but she confirms to him that it was her decision, and then he spills the truth about his identity, and about where he's been the past 8 years. He apologizes, for lying, for planning to leave her again, for everything.

And then this happens.

You guys, this scene made me go straight up insane. You can tell how much he had cared and loved her for all these years, and how his biggest fear is literally the main character getting hurt or something happening to her. I felt so emotional over it, that after this act I started DESPERATELY pulling for his card and I finally- finally got it

Episode 5 BTW is one of my favorites in the main story, it is 3 parts because it's THAT good. It's when people will start seeing what Luke is as a character, what's beneath the surface you see in episode 1. (Also this episode introduced the best character: Hugh Moss AHAHH)

The parallel between Rosa, and Jasmine (the reporter whose case you investigate), was not lost on me. That reporter died trying to expose the truth which is exactly what Rosa has been trying to do. I think the entire chapter literally is showing you why Luke is so scared of her continuing the path she's in.

But you know what's the best part? He's freaking terrified, yet he never forces her to leave. He says this:

People keep saying Luke is a red flag that keeps trying to control Rosa and her actions and I swear my reaction is always “Are you even paying attention?” Luke never forces Rosa, he only shows he's against it, but he always says he will support her whatever decision she makes.

A similar more light-hearted situation is the story of his summer card “Iridescent Heartbeat” where Luke is afraid of Rosa getting hurt or doing things that are too much for her so he doesn't consider doing things such as Bungee jumping or rafting. But Rosa insists that she wants to do it and when she's visibly afraid later, Luke teases her a bit (LOL)

but then holds her close to him and soothes her saying there's nothing to be afraid of cause he's there.

He encourages her to do what she wants! And when she does indeed get hurt because the rope was too tight around her leg, he does NOT put the blame on her, but on himself-

Y'ALL HOW IS THIS GUY CONTROLLING??

(The scene after kinda got on my nerves cause Rosa got “angry” that he’s not his usual “cheerful self” like girl I love you but please- can’t you see how much you getting hurt affects him? She pretends that she’s angrier than she actually is making Luke apologize over and over like 💀 but tbh it was also funny, I don’t like how she handled it but it was funny lol)

When they go rafting Luke lets Rosa take the lead and he will follow her because she wanted to prove to him that he doesn't need to plan everything, however Rosa's plan backfires, things go horribly wrong and she can't figure out how to get the raft to go straight. Luke again, does not reprimand her in any way and only helps her so she can do what she wants. Later on even after they've fallen off the raft and onto the water he immediately holds her and takes her up to the surface so worried like “are you okay???” And despite all that, he says she's right. That she's always right and he will stop trying to plan and go more with the flow. 

Luke never tried to control Rosa, he just loves her so much that he does not want to ever see her in pain or sad. He wants her to be the happiest girl in the world.

So who is Luke? Luke is the coolest mf, a guy that always jumps into action to help others with a heart so damn big that his own emotions slowly destroy him. He has felt an astronomical amount of guilt and regret since childhood- and has cared for and loved the main character just as long. The girl who is the reason he was able to keep his sanity, the girl who he always wanted to protect, and the girl who is the reason he is still here today. 

I wholeheartedly believe that without Rosa in his life, Luke would've ended up completely different, if still alive at all.

Bonus: I remember people being like, the characters have gemstones that match their color in the proposal ring, so why does Luke have Ruby instead of something like Topaz? This is why.. the ruby in the ring represents Rosa (getting emotional over here omg) and honestly that ring is freaking insane because not only did he design and make it and its box by himself for years.. but a ruby is inside the key that Rosa gave to him.

Remember how Luke when you click on the key in visit says “I wear it like this to have it as close as possible to my heart” now look at the key.. if the Ruby is Rosa, and Luke’s heart is the key, do you see what he conveyed in that ring? Yea, I’m crying too. 

______________________________

Part 5: Obsession

I have a bit of an obsession problem, I've been obsessed with stories, games, or characters and that obsession can last years of my lifetime. And it's understandable, when you're going through terrible things in your life, you get attached to what makes you feel happy and you hold on to that feeling. That's what starts that obsession.

When I got the second anniversary Artem card I did the story immediately and it was.. it was alright. Artem wants to propose, but in his attempt to keep it all secret distances himself too much and gets Rosa worried, but then wow! He proposes with the help of his coworkers and happy ending + things get a bit spicy at the end. 

But I felt like.. like I'm getting deja vu AHAHA like I've seen this kind of story a million times before. (Probably cause I did from watching a bunch of kdramas and having consumed a bunch of stories from a lot of media) It did not exactly get me to feel anything much, I'm sure it's different for Artem stans though having him propose after probably following his story for 2 years XD good on you guys have fun with your mans! 

For me though who had just started, it did not have that much of an effect. After I got the Luke anniversary card I was excited and went into the story oh so innocently not knowing back then that Luke cards are honestly heart wrenching. 

It led to me crying in bed while the sun was rising from the window as Luke says “That's because I love you.”

The way how he blocks the wind from her and lets it hit him instead at that exact moment is freaking PEAK writing.

That card showed me a lot more about this man who is so shackled by his own emotions and circumstance, that he's willing to sacrifice everything even his own wants and dreams for the one he loves.

Have you guys seen that one official art with Rosa posing as Themis? And the boys are represented by the objects around her? Luke is the sword, Artem is the balance, Vyn is the blindfold, and Marius is the snake by her leg.

It starts to make sense why Luke is holding onto her sword to the point of bleeding, he's bleeding yet he looks up to her in absolute devotion not caring for what happens to him and his eyes are only always on her. He’s willing to be her sword, to take all of the pain and protect her so she can be happy.

My life.. has not been what is considered “normal”. I'm not going to give my backstory in this post aHAHAH but at the time when I started Tears of Themis I was going through a very bad point in my life where I was close to have given up completely on my future and accepted my fate as it is. I had shut down completely, and I went back to becoming a shut-in which is honestly something I went through for four years before, it wasn't good. 

When you reach that point, you start becoming apathetic to everything.

Luke however, somehow started making me start having emotions again. Reading and learning about this character was actually affecting me in a way I have not been affected in a long time. He felt.. real, like I could feel his emotions, his love, his despair.

And that's part of why I got so attached to him and he became my comfort, because of him, I started to feel human again.

AHA CRINGE. OK enough with the sadness.

But I'll never forget how much Luke and Tears of Themis helped me keep a grip during those hard months. I'm in a better place now, it's not good- but it's better, and I still just open this game and visit Luke to help me ground myself.

One time after a bad day I accidentally touched him and he said this, I went insane-

I think that says a lot about the state of my sanity AHAHAH 

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