Temet Nosce

Alright, I'll be honest here... I've been wanting some action. It all started last week. I was having some trouble with putting myself to sleep, so I decided to watch scalp massage videos on YouTube (lol I know I suck). Video after video, it went on, and on, and on... until I found myself watching lap dance videos. Man, if I had a dick, I would have had a massive boner that could have went on for days. The videos got me that thirsty lol But the thing is, I don't want to do any of those with my girlfriend. I just don't see myself doing it with her. It's not that I'm not attracted to her, I just don't feel like doing it with her. Okay, maybe I'm not attracted to her in THAT way. Or maybe I am, it's just that I don't want to fuck her because 1. She's my girlfriend 2. I don't think she's into that stuff 3. She's my girlfriend 4. I really don't think she's into that stuff 5. She's my girlfriend 6. I've never really talked to her about it 7. She's my girlfriend 8. She said she doesn't want to do it, ever. Lately, I've been dreaming about making out, and even fucking someone else. Thing is, the person's faceless. Like, I know it's a girl, but I don't see any facial feature so I really can't tell who she is. I want to do it so bad, but I don't want to do it with her, and yeah, I'm down with doing it with someone else... I think. Does this even qualify as cheating because I honestly don't know anymore. I am so confused. Fuck you, YouTube and your lap dance videos. :(((

Alright, so let's pretend that all of you's my girlfriend. Okay, so here goes... I'm not sure if I'm just being shallow or anything, but you just fucking tore down my trust. I don't know if you remember, but that guy used to fucking hit on you, and I bet he still does. I'm not sure if you entertain him, but I really hope you don't, didn't, and won't. So, now you're fucking talking to him? Wow, how would you like it if I talked to every girl that ever hit and hits on me? I don't know if you're that naive, or if you're just plain dense, or that you're that much of an undercover flirt, I don't even fucking know anymore. I don't trust you, and I never will. Never again.

Hi, I'm Nat. I've been dating the most wonderful, amazing, and most beautiful girl I've met for almost half a year now. I'm not complaining though, okay. In fact, I love every second of it, just like how I love every bit of her; all of her. That dork. But lately, I think I might have turned myself into a laughing stock to my friends. I have earned myself a new name. Hi, I'm the unmanyak manyak. I think it's quite stupid how they somehow see me as someone lower now just because they found out that I haven't done anything to my girlfriend. Yep, you got that right. 6 months and I still haven't banged her. Heck, I don't think I've even legit made out with her. I'm such a loser, boohoo. Nah, bullshit. I don't know, I just think it's pathetic how it's sort of like a requirement to fuck or do sexual acts with the person you're dating within the first few months of the relationship. That's not how I roll, okay. I changed my views with regards to these things over the past few years. Back then, all I wanted was to make out and do crazy shit. Sure, maybe I'm fine with doing that until now, but unlike before, it isn't my priority anymore. But if you want to get it on with me some time soon, that's absolutely fine. *wink* Hahaha! Kidding. The way I see it, if I'm into you, being in a relationship with you is the greatest thing that could happen between the both of us. To make out, fuck, or anything like that is a huge bonus, but I don't think it's a requirement or that necessary. Just my two cents.