My thoughts. Am I going crazy?

You think its okay to be so dramatic and loud, but you claim to be an abuse victim and get a fright with every loud noise... You know your drinking effects everyone around you and then you become louder! You know your drunkenness brings up old traumas for me, but you continue to be selfish. As a victim from abuse myself, I know from experience that I get anxious when I don't please the people around me. You need to decide who and what you are and stop pretending to be a victim of abuse when you are just as much an abuser.

Why is it that I always crave your love and attention and you couldn't care less?

How can you feel happy, but feel the darkness creeping underneath?

What do you do when you feel isolated? What do you do when you get blamed for everything that goes wrong? How do you heal yourself in these conditions? What is the point of healing if your environment is poisoned?

You quick to push my boundaries, but don't care to stay for the meltdowns! Why must other people clean up your mess?!

Your quick to talk shit behind my back and pretend like you didn't when your caught, but yet I'm the one you lean on to keep you safe and sane?

If a child is viewed by the world as a gift, then why did you leave me in the corner to gather dust and bruises over the year? And now you want me in your life after you have lost everything? So why can't I put you and all the my emotions and bruises that is tied to you in the corner?