indie female multi-muse penned by brandy, 21+.
| CARRD. | MEMES. |
Game of Thrones Daily

Origami Around

⁂
Acquired Stardust
trying on a metaphor
Today's Document
hello vonnie

Product Placement

Kiana Khansmith
art blog(derogatory)

Discoholic 🪩

Andulka

Janaina Medeiros
cherry valley forever
Three Goblin Art
taylor price
Peter Solarz
Cosimo Galluzzi

roma★

seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United Kingdom

seen from Malaysia
seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from T1
seen from Türkiye

seen from Côte d’Ivoire
seen from China
seen from France

seen from Germany
seen from United States

seen from Malaysia

seen from United Kingdom

seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from Peru
@mythictold
indie female multi-muse penned by brandy, 21+.
| CARRD. | MEMES. |

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
hello friends and foes! long time no see.
as you can tell, i have not been here. honestly it's for the sake of my own sanity, plus my busy schedule, and i'm too old for the drama that pops up every couple of weeks. tumblr has just become like, not fun.
however i am still writing!
just not here.
if anyone is interested in writing with me, i'm exclusively discord right now. you are welcome to add me there for the purposes of writing, or just to chat (because i do love some of you dearly). find me there as @brandflakeeee.
hello friends and foes! long time no see.
as you can tell, i have not been here. honestly it's for the sake of my own sanity, plus my busy schedule, and i'm too old for the drama that pops up every couple of weeks. tumblr has just become like, not fun.
however i am still writing!
just not here.
if anyone is interested in writing with me, i'm exclusively discord right now. you are welcome to add me there for the purposes of writing, or just to chat (because i do love some of you dearly). find me there as @brandflakeeee.
hello friends and foes! long time no see.
as you can tell, i have not been here. honestly it's for the sake of my own sanity, plus my busy schedule, and i'm too old for the drama that pops up every couple of weeks. tumblr has just become like, not fun.
however i am still writing!
just not here.
if anyone is interested in writing with me, i'm exclusively discord right now. you are welcome to add me there for the purposes of writing, or just to chat (because i do love some of you dearly). find me there as @brandflakeeee.
hello friends and foes! long time no see.
as you can tell, i have not been here. honestly it's for the sake of my own sanity, plus my busy schedule, and i'm too old for the drama that pops up every couple of weeks. tumblr has just become like, not fun.
however i am still writing!
just not here.
if anyone is interested in writing with me, i'm exclusively discord right now. you are welcome to add me there for the purposes of writing, or just to chat (because i do love some of you dearly). find me there as @brandflakeeee.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
hey dudes. i'm not dead. just tired. having covid really fucked up my exhaustion levels as in i am tired literally all of the time now. tumblr is a lot of energy for me, so i am not writing as much. i am however open to doing stuff on discord because it's less stress/strain on me. please hmu if you're interested.
Still alive! I'm in rehearsal hell right now too so the free time shortens.
hey dudes. i'm not dead. just tired. having covid really fucked up my exhaustion levels as in i am tired literally all of the time now. tumblr is a lot of energy for me, so i am not writing as much. i am however open to doing stuff on discord because it's less stress/strain on me. please hmu if you're interested.
Second week of school and I tested positive for COVID. Fml.
I'm finally vaguely on the mend. But also trying to catch up on work and etc. please be patient with me.
Second week of school and I tested positive for COVID. Fml.
she isn’t angry with him. it wasn’t something he was expecting but is grateful for. nick didn’t see it as fair she wouldn’t get to meet their son or be a part of his life. there were so many factors that had gone into the choice he made ⸻ perhaps even a little bit of selfishness. they had fought against the clock before his encounter with hukter, and he didn’t want that clock to run out so soon. they were supposed to have eternity and he was going to make damn sure she got it. she had suffered so much at the hands of john when it came to ashley and doing it alone. this time it was the two of them against all the odds even if it meant that he had completely altered her dna by introducing the altered sekhem dna he carried to her source blood.
he and etok had spent hours discussing the ritual and what it would mean and the risks. there wasn’t much more they could lose when it came to the alternative outcome. it was either going to work or it was going to completely destroy her dna. nick’s theory had been one he spent his own time researching without her knowing what he was up to. it had worked on nihi and etok when their healing factor was removed by the red cloud. the sekhem dna he carried was altered by his own ancient abnormal dna, making it so it wasn’t pure and therefore wouldn’t clash with the source blood.
his fingers lace with hers, his gaze moving towards their son in her arms. he had almost lost all of this ⸻ her and their son. hukter had said to him back on the ice those years ago ‘you are the beginning of the new sekhem. i am the ending of the old sekhem. the choices you make will determine the outcome of these words. i have chosen you, my child, because you walk a world between realms… it is time to make them into one.’ slowly nick was starting to understand what he meant. though his guiding spirit is still with him, the choices made here were all his own.
nick can’t help be smile, the hand not holding her uses a finger to brush the soft skin against oliver’s cheek. “our best invention yet.” he replies leaning forward to press his lips to her forehead. standing from his place beside her, he moves to the head of the bed to elevate it so she can lean against it. nick knows she must still be exhausted as well as their son. he takes a moment to find his shirt since oliver, although early, was doing a fine job with his healing factor taking the lead. reaching into his pocket, he retrieved the ear piece remembering he told ashley to wait for his call.
“ash…” he calls over the radio. “i think it’s time you come down and meet your baby brother., tell etok he can stand down.” setting the ear piece back down, he returns his attention to her. “i want to show you something.” moving back to the bed, he sits down beside her. “listen to what i say and do as i do.” a smile is offered, he leans over oliver carefully pressing his forehead to hers, his eyes take on their hot white hue. “focus on him, block out every other sound you can hear.” with one hand he places hers under his on their son.
“listen closely… you can hear it, beneath mine.” just as he can hear it beneath hers. “a gift of the sekhem… for those they are bonded to.”
she memorizes every inch of her son within moments, instinctively assessing him medically - but he's thriving, more than she could ever expect for being so early. his breathing even, his color is excellent - he yawns like it's most exhausting being a newborn and helen practically melts then and there. she'd almost forgotten the delicate intricacies and softness that babies offer, wholly innocent and reliant to survive the world around them. nick had ensured oliver's survival - and her own. how can she possibly be angry with that? it's a lot of unpack of course, to understand in the long run - but the healing that nick has granted her and oliver has saved both of their lives. she has a hundred questions to be answered but all of it can wait.
for once, she is not in any hurry.
her head snaps up at the loss of nick's weight against the bed, the warmth of his presence - but she hears him speak and realizes he's affording the rest of their family the information that she isn't dead, and oliver has arrived. she has no idea how long it's been, how long she's been out - just that nick has kept his promise all along. as if she could ever doubt him. he returns to her side rather swiftly and helen tilts her head, allowing him to guide her.
it's difficult at first, blocking out all the other noise that seems somehow sharper, more clear with senses that seem to be somewhat enhanced than previously were. whether a permanent or temporary adjustment she isn't sure. helen can picky up the steady thrumming of nick's own heartbeat, loud and steady and sure. just beneath it though, she can just pick up on what he refers to. the almost hummingbird speed at which their son's heartrate beats. an assurance that he is indeed thriving, content, and well at home in his parents' embrace. her heart lurches up into her throat as nick explains it. a gift. it's more than she could ever ask. a constant assurance that her family is safe and sound. a bond beyond the norm.
"you saved our lives." helen murmurs as she leans against nick, head resting against his shoulder. enshrouded in the noise that is his heartbeat and oliver's. there's a certain sense of awe to her voice, as if she might still wake up from these moments and realize it's a dream - or death induced nightmare.
"you don't have to tell me twice." it's ashley who sweeps through the door with little fanfare, worry still written in her face; it's been a while and it's the first she's heard from nick. but to see the trio of them huddled on the bed - alive and looking too damn adorable for their own good. "don't let me interrupt. i - just wanted to make sure things were okay. and meet this little guy. big sister rights and all."

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
nick isn’t sure how much time had passed. his time is occupied keeping his son warm against him as he watches quietly and waits. knowing how long it takes for the healing factor to work, it would be a while before she wakes. the others are waiting, but they will have to continue to wait ⸻ no one will be allowed to see his son until she does first. nick knows she went into this thinking she’d never meet him, that he’d grow and not know the mother who was willing to sacrifice everything just for him, just as nick would do the same if it were up to him. the very same blood transfer ritual that was performed on him, he in turn had performed it on her knowing it was the only way to save her.
he didn’t give her a choice, just as hukter didn’t give him one. this was different however ⸻ his situation was not life or death for himself, it was to save the future of the sekhem and for their alpha to pick who he wanted to take his place and that just so happened to be nick. a man who has never truly been human. a man who was now anything but that he was hybrid and in turn he has given her the sekhem dna to initiate the healing process so she can still carry on her work with the network, and meet their son.
standing watch, he noticed the color returning to her features before she shot upright. he remembers the very same thing happening to him on more than one occasion. once in this very infirmary when the cabal had used their red cloud against him. not moving, he didn’t want to disturb the infant asleep against his chest. noting the lilac hue to her gaze, it was a confirmation that the ritual had worked.
nick gives a nod in reply to the name of their son, and when she reaches out, he carefully stands moving closer to the bed. oliver has been waiting to meet you. comes the reply, his gaze following her own. the still healing wound on her hand. sitting on the edge of the bed, he carefully hands their son to her, offering her a small but sad smile. there needed to be an explanation, he needed to come clean about what he had done. while fate had a plan in mind ⸻ nick decided to not let fate take the wheel. not this time.
“no… you shouldn’t have.” his voice is quiet, soft to not wake the infant, whose hair was a blonde fuzz across his little head. “it’s…. a lot to process. I didn’t give you the option to say yes or no. I hated hukter for doing the very same but he allowed me to save you ⸻ to save both of you. oliver… he needs both of us. i couldn’t let you sacrifice everything and not take part in it. the network needs you, our son needs you, and i need you.”
nick was sure she wasn’t going to like the things he had done when taking control but the safety of oliver and helen were his top priority and always will be. the floor was quiet, he wasn’t sure what nicole had told the others but he had told ashley to disregard everything she’s told. “I made a promise to you. but i also made a promise to our daughter and our son. i wouldn’t let anything happen to either of you.” sighing softly, his gaze settled on oliver. “he’s a bit of an over achiever already. he’s healing himself, and he’s stable as ever. it will take some time for your body to understand the changes…”
nick had a further understanding of how the sekhem rituals worked. it wouldn’t be the same as him due to the extinct dna in his blood line but the ritual would alter her dna and introduce the sekhem dna to her source blood. it’s different than if hukter would have done it with pure sekhem dna. Nick’s dna was a hybrid mix. “i’m sorry… for not giving you the choice of saying yes or no… had the roles been reversed, i know you would have done the same.”
they'd tossed names back and forth for ages, neither of them quite settling on one or the other. over dinners or lab work when they needed a break, girl and boy names traded like cards. then simply boy names once it had been revealed they'd be having a son. nothing stuck, combinations offered and rejected between them. some of their team had even offered ideas (ramon and henry had been offering their own names for weeks before helen had shot them both down for the sake of fairness). she doesn't remember which of them had suggested oliver - truthfully she thinks it might have been a joke after nick had first called their baby 'olive'. something about it had warmed on both of them. his name sticks in her mind now, instinctive and downright obsessive until she his tiny frame is settled into her arms.
everything else doesn't seem nearly as important as she feels him move, mesmerized by tiny fingers that splay and curl and those pouty lips. he's still small for his size, but utterly perfect and helen can scarcely believe this little one has made her a mother once more. it doesn't matter that she's died and been brought back. the world could absolutely explode around her and helen isn't sure she'd notice, determined to memorize every little feature of their son - the son she didn't know she'd get to meet.
she doesn't tear her gaze away until nick speaks of not giving choices, the decision he'd made for the sake of all of them. he'd never had a choice in his abnormality, not the way helen had in her original experiments. it isn't new to her; many abnormals exist because they are forced to, not because they chose that life. she shifts - or does her best to - so nick might be closer to her, their baby, who rests so contented in her arms that it feels almost like a dream (though perhaps that's just the medication or the remnants of her husband's meddling with her genetics).
silently she reaches for nick, his hand, anchoring their fingers together with the hand not supporting oliver. in her gaze is everything the opposite of what she assumes that nick will assume - understanding, empathy, and not a trace of regret or ire. helen is not perfect; she is selfish enough to want to know their son. to remain in the land of the living to continue her work. to fully have the eternity promised to her by nick. she isn't angry. she isn't upset not to have a choice. because he's right - she'd have done the same in his position.
"don't apologize. this - it's the best gift i've ever gotten. time. with you. our family. our work." she murmurs, finding her voice after another moment. warmth pools in her chest but it's different than before. not a fever, but an emotion that feels like it might very well leak out of every orifice. "i'm not upset or angry or . . . anything else beyond . . . grateful." her gaze moves back to oliver and she's able to bend her head enough to press a kiss to that soft downy fringe, pale and blonde as they are. the burn to her eyes returns, unshed tears gathering in the corners as it hits her - as ready as she had been to give everything so their son might live, she is acutely aware she would have otherwise been robbed of this moment.
the universe has granted her reprieve once more against death, and helen would be a fool not to embrace it, no matter how it had come to her.
it's true she feels weird, strange even, and underlying unknown coursing through her. sekhem dna now bleeding into her source blood, forever binding her to their race. it's an overwhelming thought - nick is right in that it will take her time to adjust. until then, she is content to focus on him, on their son. she offers her husband a smile then, the first since the whole ordeal had started.
"look at him. he's perfect." and her expression is a little watery. "our surprise. his father's best invention yet, i think."
if you're wondering why i've literally been the speed of a turtle in writing anything, it's because school started last week and this week i audition my kiddos and next week start rehearsals and basically everything is happening all at once at all times so my brain cannot do it's usual bullshit parkour between muses very well.
i'm back on my hyperfocus shit again. except this time it's helen and trek.
❝𝐩𝐨𝐢𝐬𝐨𝐧❞ a collection of lines from the 2003 publication "poison" by chris wooding.
❛ some of us are born in the right place, and some of us have to go look for it. ❜
❛ don't feel hard done by. i go out of my way to hinder everyone. ❜
❛ i refuse to believe i'm hearing this. not from you! ❜
❛ what are you grinning about? ❜
❛ people who grin usually have something to hide. ❜
❛ why is it that people live here? ❜
❛ what's it like? out there? ❜
❛ put your jaw back together. you look like a snake trying to swallow an egg. ❜
❛ is it what you expected? ❜
❛ some of us are born in the right place, and some of us have to go look for it. ❜
❛ i seem to recall hiring you for a purpose. ❜
❛ if you weren't swindling me as we speak, i'd hug you. ❜
❛ what possessed you to try something like that anyway? ❜
❛ people don't know how to react if you don't do what they expect. it doesn't matter what you are, it's how you appear. ❜
❛ you can't go in there on your own! ❜
❛ i've always been good at riddles. ❜
❛ i'd try and change your mind, but i know you too well. ❜
❛ at least tell me why. since we'll never meet again, at least tell me why. ❜
❛ i'll come and find you when i return. ❜
❛ don't make promises you can't keep. ❜
❛ i've always been here, i think. i can remember anything before, anyway. ❜
❛ but you came in here to rescue me. why? you could have just taken the money you had and lived out the rest of your life happily.❜
❛ i just wanted them to die. they didn't have to make such a drama about it. ❜
❛ i'm here now. can't pretend i'm happy about it, but i made my choice. i knew where i'd end up when i came in after you. ❜
❛ time is not the same here. we might have already been gone a thousand years from home, and when we get back there won't be a thing we recognize. ❜
❛ that's a terrible thing to say. ❜
❛ you can laugh yourself insane, for all i care. ❜
❛ this is like an adventure, isn't it? ❜
❛ well, until you stop throwing yourself into these things like a fool, i suppose i'm stuck with you. ❜
❛ the sooner i prove to you that this won't work, the better. ❜
❛ no wild idea goes urewarded. ❜
❛ are you done gawking? ❜
❛ everything's a story. it just depends on your point of view. ❜
❛ i've been thinking, and you're going to listen to what i have to say. ❜
❛ save your sympathy. i've heard your apologies before; i'm not interested. ❜
❛ have you seen what your principles are doing to us? ❜
❛ this one again? what a thorn you turned out to be. ❜
❛ you truly are a monstrous annoyance to me. ❜
❛ there has to be something we're missing. ❜
❛ say nothing of this. i will deal with it. ❜
❛ does anyone else know? ❜
❛ this is not part of the way of things, it is not part of life! it's only part of life because we let it be!. ❜
nick simply nods remaining quiet. he doesn’t feel the need to acknowledge the instructions, he knows their son will be fine with the addition to his healing factor. he’s listening to the fading beat and the rapid beat of the one beneath it. for nick there is silence, he doesn;t hear anything from helen because he knows she is sedated beyond words. it isn’t until he hears the cry of their son that he allows the world around him to return. attention is split between the two of them, watching the nurse with his newborn and nicole with his wife. he’s quiet but that’s nothing new for nick, hes always been and always will be a quiet person. none of this is how it should have gone, the factors that were unknown were far too great and this was one of the things they spoke about.
taking his son in his arms, nick holds the tiny frame close to him. he’d do as he was told once the others have left the room. the hot white hue is intense as he watches nicole work. once in his arms, their son is quiet, as if he senses the bond already between them. as if he was fully at ease with being in nick’s arms. this is not ordinary birth one would experience in the human world of things. they were both abnormal, he was a hybrid and their son followed in that endeavour. when he was handed their son, the infant was tense until it was nick he was holding him ⸻ he could feel him relax in his arms even further.
watching with a steady gaze until they leave the room. in the hallway, etok steps forward. piercing blue and glowing gaze settles on the group, his lips raise in a snarl as he moves behind them to guide them towards the lift. “join the others. do not return to this floor. lethal force has been authorized. inform the others to remain away until he clears the emergency protocol.” his voice echoes off the walls as it always had, once they are in the lift, his gaze looks towards the door they had come from before placing his large from in front of the lift doors. should they open, he will be the first thing they encounter.
in the room, nick takes a moment to gaze down at their son, he was already sound asleep in his arms. “hello, oliver.” he whispers. a smile growing over his lips as they press to the infants forehead. lifting his gaze towards helen, the white hot hue that has remained for the last hour fades, his dark gaze saddened by the sight in front of him. “had i known…” he says, and for a moment he places his son in the small bassinet so he can get to work and do what he needs to in order to save his wife and the mother of his child. making sure oliver was covered and warm for the time being, he approaches the side of the bed, he studies her pale features before bending to press his lips to her forehead. “you were so ready to sacrifice everything ⸻ always have been.”
a hand reaches for the monitor attached to her, turning it off. “i made a promise to you and to ashley. i know you didn’t believe it. i wouldn’t let anything happen to either of you. Oliver needs both of us, honey. i only hope you forgive me for not giving you the choice to say yes or no.” reaching down into his boot, he pulls his combat knife from its hiding place. oliver makes a small noise, gathering his attention but only briefly. “hang on love bug, i’ll be there soon.” attention returning to helen, he reaches for one of her hands taking the blade to her palm and slicing it open. his gaze lifts to her but she is still under heavy sedation ⸻ she’s not supposed to wake up. nick had other plans.
holding his own hand out in front of him, he does the same as he did with her hand. replacing the knife in his boot. the palm that bleeds is squeezed for more of his blood to come out before he places his wound over hers, holding her hand tightly. “i never break my promises to you, and i won’t start now.” after a few moments, he pulls his hand away ⸻ it heals quickly. holding her hand in his, the gaze he holds on it is intent until he can see small fibers begin to form within the wound he had created. unable to contain his relief, he signs heavily head falling to the hand he held. “rest… we will be here when you wake up.”
returning to the cot, nick removes the scrub shirt he was given and picks their son up holding him against his chest before sitting in the chair beside her bed. listening closely, he can hear the steady beat of olivers heart and the slow return to a normal beat of hers. “you rest too, little one. you’ll be able to meet your mum soon. then you can meet your sister and your grandfather. for now, it’s you and me.” and no one will get to see you or hold you until she wakes up.
helen has spent most of her life fighting against the realm of death and it's grasp. her longevity has ensured time does not claim her - she's always expected her death will be in a hail of bullets, doing what she does best for the world of abnormals. something loud, explosive, and fighting - even now she fights, trying to claw her way back from a murky depth of unconsciousness - at least until she's no longer aware. she doesn't dream. doesn't feel. simply and quietly fades until it feels as though there is . . . nothing.
she doesn't feel the knife at her palm. doesn't hear the quiet noise from her newborn son that she will never meet. even nick's voice, as near as it is, doesn't register in the darkness that shrouds her - the blood loss and sedation keep her under, her body fading rather swiftly. it's not something her abnormality can save her from. not on it's own.
time blurs. sensations slowly return, but she can't make sense of them. pain, yes. an uncomfortable heaviness across her torso. a feeling she can't explain that feels as if her body itself is stitching itself back together. is she still in surgery? it feels like she's trying to break the surface of a deep and dark body of water, struggling to breathe - in her mind, at least. what's left of it. surely this is not death, this in between space that leaves her trying to break that invisible surface tension? she wants to claw her way out, find some other existence -
her body lurches upward with a sudden and sharp gasp, dragging in a lungful of air as she startles into consciousness by force, as if something has dragged her from the depths. her body immediately protests but the pain is not as bad as she expects. the strange warmth that envelopes her feels not unlike before but . . . different - she can barely process it as she opens her eyes and blinks against the lights of the infirmary, still trying to grab another great lungful of air like a drowning man. she doesn't feel, nor notice, the hue of her gaze shift as she takes in her surroundings - the infirmary. a sharp instinct pulls her gaze to her bedside - is she dead? is she having an out of body experience?
no - of course not - her mind tries to supply logic. coupled with the sharp awareness of her surroundings, helen zeros in on nick at her bedside, her mind instinctively reaching out for his as she grounds herself back into reality, back into the realm of the living. her heart lurches up into her throat when she realizes he's holding a child - their son. alive. content. her eyes burn before she can stop them.
oliver. talking aloud feels like too much energy, fatigue crushing into her like a brick wall in a way that's almost foreign. and still she reaches for him - for nick, the baby, the both of them - but her gaze catches sight of the new injury at her palm. it's not fulled healed, but certainly enough for her to know it isn't a new injury. not in the usual sense. her gaze snaps back to nick with a dawning understanding.
i shouldn't have woken up.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
there isn’t anything he can do aside from letting the medical staff do their job. he doesn’t want to be in the way or to impede anything they can do to help her and their son ⸻ though he is well aware there is nothing they can do for her. she’s fighting against the odds in typical helen fashion, but his gaze locks on her when he hears his name flutter across his mind. i know. he replies, fighting the emotions building within him. he needs to remain calm for her sake, for their sons sake. ignoring the staff, he’s by her side. if it comes to it, i will do as you asked but it will not come to that. do you hear me? blocking out the sounds around him, he listens as he always had to the rapid beat that is nearly twice as fast as it normally is.
when he is aware that whatever they had given her takes it’s affect he moves from her side finding nicole. “you get my son out, and close her up. you and i both know there is nothing you can do. when you are done i want everyone out of this room and to be left with my wife and son. I will not hear anything else about it. she deserves peace and quiet.” and nick had his own plans in mind. accepting the scrubs, the ear piece is once again retrieved from his pocket. what the hell was he going to tell ashley?
stepping into the hall, a hand runs down his features, his senses are still attached to the two people on the other side of the door that mean the world to him. gregory would be there by now and with ashley. ramon and kate would be in the lab and will would be arriving again with gregory in tow. swallowing a heavy lump in his throat, he clears it.
“Ash. keep your grandfather off the infirmary ward for the time being…i ⸻ it’s not looking good but i made a promise to you and i plan to keep that promise. i need you to trust me. you are going to have to disregard whatever nicole tells you. it’s going to sound terrifying but ⸻ just trust me. i will let you know when it’s safe to come back down here.” removing the ear peice he doesn’t wait for a reply. instead he makes his way down the hall and out into the corridor where etok is. he kneels in front of him and their foreheads touch.
‘you understand what needs to be done, nicholas? we have spoke on this many times. all will be well if you do as you were taught. you have done it before with the others ⸻ this is no different.’ nick nods slowly, looking down towards the ground between them before the elder sekhem nudges him with his head. ‘you are strong, child. hukter has spoken to you briefly of what you must do to save them both. i cannot help with this, it is your role and yours alone.”
standing nick places his hand between his ears. “no one is allowed on this floor. not even those we know. when the staff leaves that room, they are not to return. no one.” etok gives a brief bow of his head as does nihi when nick gives a glance in her direction.
making quick work of the scrubs, he leaves his sekhem to return to the room. stepping inside his gaze settles on nicole and he can tell the white hue makes her unsettled. “when you are done with what i have requested, you and everyone in this room are to leave this floor and not return. if you do ⸻ you will no longer work for the network.” he almost dared her to challenge him, but he knew the sekhem side of him was beyond intimidating, she wouldn’t dare try it.
ashley doesn't have telepathy or some other inane sense beyond her enhanced, almost vampiric ones. she doesn't need those senses to tell that something is wrong. the eerie way that nick's voice crackles in her ear tells her all she needs. the situation isn't good. instinctively she wants to charge right to the infirmary to her mom, worried she won't get another chance - but something in his voice gives her pause. whatever he's doing, whatever he has planned . . . she has to trust him. she already has for some time - but this might be the hardest point in which she has to believe in his words, his promises. he's never broken one to her mom, and she assumes he will not break the one to her.
"alright." she answers her earpiece quietly but she doesn't get a response. doesn't even know if he's heard her. keeping her grandfather occupied will be a feat, but she's handled worse. a little lie will go a long way.
"nick's gonna let us know when we can go down. mom's in surgery." she addresses the others in the room, voice steady. assured. definitely not lying. "she's gonna be fine."
nicole, however, is not convinced. she's done this procedure before of course, though there is something unsettling about performing it on her boss - who's already lost far too much blood and far too quickly and she isn't sure they can replace it quickly enough - nor if there even is any on hand storage of the source blood to fix it . . . magnus would have made sure she knew about it if so, for situations like this. and the way her other boss hovers and makes demands sets her teeth on edge - but she can't argue. he's in charge too, especially since the head of the entire network currently lies on an operating table. and she's not about to lose her job, or her head, for disobeying him.
"as soon as the baby's out and cleared - you need him against you. skin to skin." nicole says instead of any arguments otherwise. "since dr. magnus isn't able to at the moment. he's early but should be alright - the contact will help him thrive. just. hold him close. the nurses will leave anything you need. after . . . there isn't anything i can do." she has to pretend it isn't her boss lying under the scalpel, focusing on the task at hand with the same assuredness as the rest of her surgeries.
she has to work quickly - and does, because there is little else to be done. as in distress as the child is and as quickly as helen is bleeding out. the sharp smell of rust enters her nostrils but nicole does not waver, moving with sharp and practiced accuracy until she is able to put her hands on the tiny infant who's decided to make his entrance too early, passing him along first to one nurse, who doesn't hesitate to quickly tend to the baby before offering him out to his father.
it takes little time for nicole to repair the damage done - what she can, at least, with stitches that magnus had once taught her. she arranges the blankets nicely afterward over helen's frame, only hesitating briefly before she looks to nick and then steps back. ensures the other medical staff have retreated before she does the same, a sense of heaviness deep in her chest.
helen doesn't like being in control and she knows the direction this is heading - which is out of her control. there's little control to labour as it is, but coupled with whatever has their little one in distress and is sending her vitals out of sync helen is acutely aware that there is no controlling the situation - of her own, that is. nick waltzes about as if he has total control and awareness, the steadiness with which he gives orders into her ear piece. this is one thing that, as a doctor, she cannot handle on her own. it'd be infuriating if she wasn't so concerned about the sudden sense of impending doom that creeps into the back of her mind.
she trusts her medical team, her staff, the rest of the employees at the sanctuary - but it is difficult to be so out of her element.
trying to keep herself calm is a whole other endeavor as nick enacts plans that she's only vaguely aware he's made (he'd never given full specifics, but now she understands the breadth of them all; he's been preparing for a while, it seems). she focuses on the pain, the unsteadiness in her heart beat, the way the rest of her feels and reacts - silently taking inventory as she sorts through her vast medical knowledge as if the problem might jump out at her. a solvable problem, preferably. unfortunately, she draws only complex and methodically complications that only threaten to worry her further - why can't anything ever be normal for them?
she stands when he does, mostly because sitting is doing her no good. her grip on his arm doesn't relent, a heavy anchor - helen will never admit to worry or fear, but it's still written in the recesses of her expression. the pain is getting worse again, nearly taking all the breath she has in her lungs to give. bloody hell.
"nick," she says quietly, flinching. before all hell breaks loose, before she is rendered unable to do so - "listen to me." the hand not on his arm rests against his shoulder, steadying them both as the world spins. her skin feels hot, feverish, and already she wants to crawl right out of it. "---if it becomes a choice between the baby or me -" and she doesn't have time to finish the thought because the familiar noise of ashley's teleportation is there.
you choose our son. she finishes the thought in her mind. as much as she wants to believe nick's promise to her that they'll all be just fine, she is also a realist and a medical doctor in her own right who has been through this before, both as patient and doctor. abnormal or not, the risks are always there.
"right, showtime." ashley is quick to come up on her mother's side, offering her support and steadiness. one glance across both helen and nick tell her that things are not quite going to plan, but she doesn't ask - simply nods once at her orders and zorts away with her mother in the next instant.
she's gotten better, mastering her abilities, the targets in her mind - and they land right within the room that has already been set up for her mother. it offers privacy and anything they could need at hand. infirmary staff close in almost immediately as she lowers helen to the edge of the bed to sit, helping to peel away her jacket and the like with some sense of decorum. she's not the best in this sort of situation, but it's her mom and ashley is hesitant to let go of her, even when she knows she's in good hands.
"you're gonna be good - you got this. you're too badass not to." she remarks with the barest hint of a forced smile and it earns her a huff of a laugh from helen, who squeezes her daughter's arm gently before the staff kindly hip check her out of the way and she lets them, retreating to the doorway. she's on personal guard duty, ready to take out any intruders (though she doesn't expect them to make it this far at all).
she wanted him to choose between the two of them. that wasn’t an option ⸻ at least not for nick it wasn’t. offering her a small nod, he says nothing further, there is not much he can say and he doesn’t want to waste any further time they don’t have. Nick knows far more than she does in the current moment and he doesn’t like it either way. Once they vanish with ashley’s teleportation, he lets himself sigh heavily. they knew this was a possibility ⸻ had some understanding that anything can happen, and anything would happen but it doesn’t make it any easier. Nick knows he can’t allow himself to panic, the sekhem half of him doesn’t allow him to do so.
retrieving the earpiece he makes his way into the hallway. “Ramon.” he says into the ear piece and waits for him to acknowledge it. “the sekhem are taking their posts and the tunnels have been shut down. nothing in or out of the city until i say so. if rana has an issues with it tell her to take it up with me. we cannot risk anyone finding out this is going on or that helen is alive…” for how long he wasn’t sure but he wasn’t going to allow that to be spoken or said.
“general, all systems are running on protocol two one two twenty-five. tunnels are closed on kate’s report, praxis is on alert. will reports he has nearly reached gregory. your sekhem are in place. etok and nihi are stationed on the infirmary floor. nothing is getting in or out. we are entirely locked down.” ramon reports from his place in nick’s lab, he’s taken over security from the networks security team and is running it alongside kate down in his lab.
“kate has already been alerted. if anything lethal force is authorized.” taking the lift this time knowing helen is in the hands of the infirmary staff, he leans against the wall as it makes its way down further into the facility. “if anything happens ramon, you know what to do and how.” earning an acknowledgment he pulls the ear piece from his ear, shoving it in his pocket. when the lift opens he is met with etok and nihi ready to pounce but the white hot hue of his gaze brings them to a bow instead. “etok…” the elder rises. “good job.”
a nods is given as nick pushes the door open, his gaze hadn’t returned to normal with the sekhem half of him taking control allowing him to remain calm. he knew why but he was keeping the knowledge to himself. “ash.” he greets here, placing a hand on her shoulder. “i’d lie and say everything is going to be fine, but you’d hate me if i did. it’s not fine. they’re both in distress. the differences…” he sighs for a moment. “i need another favor. your grandfather is in route, i need you to meet him at the entrance and tell him exactly what i told you. etok and nihi have the infirmary floor covered and i will be in there with her, I promise you, i will not let anything happen to either of them. we aren’t losing anyone else, ever again.”
how he was going to keep that promise he wasn’t entirely sure but nick never made a promise he couldn’t keep. giving her a reassuring smile, he opens the door to the flurry of activity allowing it to close behind him. one of the staff attempted to tell him to leave but the white hue had them stand down. staying out of the way, he stands against the wall watching the scene unfold. his clamness would be eerie to anyone who didn’t understand him. i’m here ⸻ i’m not going anywhere. he says to her from his place.
in another universe where things are less complicated, this would be something far more lighthearted and not nearly as risky. helen feels herself merely going through the motions while she can, trying to refuse the urge to claw at her own skin, which suddenly feels too hot and too foreign. she is put into more comfortable clothes but they bring little comfort at all other than serve to make her more hot. she's taped up with monitors, a needle in her arm, and helen feels like a stranger in her own infirmary as she's treated as a patient. she has no control to give orders - she must trust in her staff, in nick. of course she can add her opinion, but judging by the face of the leader of her medical team, nicole, helen assumes she's reached the same conclusions.
"i don't like those numbers at all." helen remarks, briefly glancing at the device now monitoring her heart and blood pressure, as well as that of her son's. the combination of numbers is nearing dangerous and so far there is little reasoning as to why.
ashley nods once at nick at the touch to her shoulder. she trusts him. trusts the teams to take care of her mom. but that doesn't mean she still isn't worried. at least meeting her grandfather will serve as a distraction; she is of little use here. "keep me updated." is her only request to nick before she teleports away.
focused on the preliminary reports she's taken from one of the staff, helen looks at her own information as detached as possible. that bias is there again - how can she make calls when she's in this state. the pain is starting to cloud her mind, searing across every inch of her torso. ashley's arrival had been a piece of cake comparatively.
one of the nurses tells her to breathe and helen very nearly wants to snap her head right off her shoulders in a flare of irritation that immediately spikes her numbers back up into the dangerous level. the words on the report she holds are starting to blur together, the world starting to spin again even as nick's voice comes across her mind like a gentle balm. she cannot muster the energy to respond at that moment, too focused on trying to keep her calm in the sea of panic that keeps welling in the back of her throat.
"hemmoraging." helen manages between gritted teeth. the pain isn't stopping and is, in fact, only getting worse. dizzyingly so. "my hemoglobin . . . is too low. i'm losing blood internally. . . ." another hitch of her breath and for the first time, her vision starts to waver at the edges. her voice is stuttered as she drags in air - she feels as though she's suffocating. it feels too swift, everything progressing far too quickly that she can barely wrap her mind around what's happening. "placental abruption - he has - to come out. now."
nick. even her internal voice sounds worried, gaze finding his across the room despite the activity. and then and sudden calmness envelopes her - either her own doing, or whatever they've just introduced to her iv. a brief moment of sharp clarity. the rest of the room sounds vaguely underwater, nicole giving orders to the rest of the team as helen fights with every inch she has in her to stay conscious.
i'm dying.
it's not a sudden realization, but a painful admission. it's a complication she'd anticipated, but had been on her list of worst case - the universe is unkind to put this upon them. she thinks of ashley and henry and ramon, of kate and will, her father - of nick, who's gaze she still holds with what energy she can maintain. instinctively she reaches for him, distantly aware the machine she's attached to is giving a warning; her blood pressure is dropping swiftly even despite the sudden rush of warmth that washes over her ---
she cannot hold out the battle against her own body, it's distress and that of the baby's. nick. his name is like an echo as her mind fight her body's weaknesses, desperate to cling to consciousness but everything is rushing into darkness quickly. there are a million things she wants to say, should say, but her mouth refuses to cooperate and she is vaguely aware of nicole yelling something to the rest of the team as the same darkness rushes up to meet her.
"somebody get him scrubs." nicole is already moving swiftly, ordering about her team. "prep for surgery."