That's me. I'm the best ass eater.

i wish casual genetic modification was a thing so i could have a long elegant tail and cute little horns and sharp fangs full of nightmarish flesh-disolving venom

and large breasts, of course

You can begin this process at any time, regardless of how old you have become.

That’s why you should never accept the excuse “Well it was a different time.” They knew it was wrong. They always knew.

It seems like every fight the paladin gets that big red icon above her head and the boss singles her out to do this massive attack to. But it's never once happened to me. I am going to call this phenomenon tank hypervisability.

Audio on for exactly the horrible noises you expect

The ideal body.

the thing about "no one is talking about this!" posts is that at best they are weird guilt trips trying to make you feel personally responsible for the fact that you haven't heard about one specific thing happening that no one has mentioned to you. at worst they are just wrong because the op turns out to have no idea what people are talking about because they've never listened to another person in their life. either way I am not reblogging that

Every day I get a little closer to saying fuck it and becoming an apprentice in some at risk heritage craft or profession.

Wait wait do you get paid a stipend for food and shelter while you apprentice? Why would you not do this? There are some heritage crafters around here and they take students but you basically have to be independently wealthy. Otherwise I'd have been a blacksmith and ironworker six years ago. "Oh menial retail jobs that steal your soul really need me" fuck that noise

New kink called make me feel wanted

Stop clicking on my thighs. Bro my cum meter isn't moving. You need to click elsewhere.