confessions of a cinephiliac

Just watched a bootleg copy of Spermula (1976), the campy, soft-core art film that answers the burning question: What if glamorous supermodels from outer space came to drain every man on the planet of his… er… essence? There’s more, of course, including a great mid-century soundtrack, seriously surreal camera work, a very dramatic and over-dubbed Udo Kier, and a buttload of quotable lines (“Your manhood will never return. The one-eyed lizard will never again raise its head!”). Brilliant. Just brilliant. Highly recommend.

My nephew in London just told me that he's watching my anthology feature Lady Belladonna's Night Shades on Amazon Prime UK, for the first time! This year marks the 10th Anniversary and, though I love the second feature more, I still have a soft spot for this baby. If you haven't done so yet, check it out on Amazon Prime US, Tubi, and Roku channels: Halloween Flix, mometu, Zonefy, Xumo, or Trashy Horror Movies. Tell 'em Dave sent you!

People used to DO things together.

Getting ready for the Ides of March, like...

Just saw this movie on Tubi and it is preposterously enjoyable in a dirty, dirty, fun kind of way. Perverse, yet coy; vulgar, yet clever; trashy and so far from classy I’m surprised John Waters didn’t have a walk-on role. Will it change the world? No. Do I care? No. It made me laugh, and in the first dark, desperate days of 2026, I’ll take all the belly laughs I can get. Has some pretty catchy songs, too, and Bowan Yang as Disco God. And Nathan Lane spitting chewed-up ham into the faces of monster puppets. And Megan Mullally singing about her pussy falling out. And Megan Thee Stallion dominating goofy white guys. There’s more, but the ice in my drink is melting. I give it a 9 out of 10 because it didn’t have a nude scene.