a galaxy inside my head

Learning about flyovers and pyrotechnics at American games being a thing

Non-americans discovering the size of American football stadiums....for high schools in texas. Also the size of our stadiums in general.

Going to baseball games as a side treat! Lmao.

Non-americans losing their minds over "like, 100 petrol pumps," at buc-ees.

Related: Americans often forget how huge target and Walmart is.

People discovering American BBQ

Non-americans being obsessed with mid American restaurant chains like Golden Corral and Taco Bell

A lot of them really did feel god in this chile's apparently

The rightful obsession with waffle house

New understanding of American Big Drink With Ice supremacy as summer creeps in

Begrudging acceptance of mandatory water breaks during games

Americans realizing we have a Team USA and we are not, in fact, just "hosting our friends" from around the world — mostly because we won our first match and our team is decent??? Not amazing but not the worst.

Side rant: us women's football team is legendary good and we should care about that more like. Hello???

Admitting Americans are right about air conditioning

Related: the english team did warm ups in Florida RIP, and also the there's a video of the French team just being like fuck the heat, fuck the sun, this is so hot...

Americans who do not normally care about international football but fucking love a sport and cheering so we're just hyping whatever team is nearby, like we see a party and just show up and learn the chant. Like sorry many of us don't know shit about soccer but if we see a bunch of people in viking helmets or kilts or holding a bunch of flags and cheering we're game.

TAILGATING!!!!

I already said this but American yellow school bus is an international celebrity

The Scottish drank Boston dry of beer apparently, like they quadrupled what Boston normally sells for fourth of July weekend. SAM ADAMS HAD TO GET AN EMERGENCY BEER DELIVERY.

Also the English team fans got kicked out of The Londoner pub in Dallas after drinking 5,000 beers and going over max capacity lmao

Free refill drinks, tortilla chips & salsa.

So many non-americans are going to be here for the 4th of July for our 250th anniversary which is going to be great and hilarious

Non-americans discovering ranch as a beloved condiment

Non-americans understanding American obsession with hamburger now

Japan's homebase is in Texas and the cultural differences are frankly great and also the Japanese fans are SO NICE and helped clean up the stadium after a match???

Super-powers kicked in? Yeah, that’d gone well. Okay, being the Empress Of All Canines wasn’t, like, the best superpower, but she’d always liked dogs. Being able to talk to them and get them to do things was pretty neat.

Create superhero identity? Check. She’d made a costume, collected up some tough dogs to be her team, and set out to Do Some Good.

Get the attention of the big superheroes? That had… well, it had started well. She’d stopped a few robberies and stuff, and then she’d seen Guarde fighting some bad guys and weighed in and…

… and two of her dogs had been killed. And it had hurt, and they’d called for her to save them, and she hadn’t been able to. It had all suddenly been so real, and she’d started to cry.

And once it was over, Guarde had dragged her halfway across the city to this shabby old building, and started banging on a door labeled ‘NO ADMITTANCE’.

Guarde sighed and pressed a cracked button on an old intercom, which looked like it should have stopped working at least twenty years ago. “Come on, I know there’s someone in there,” she said crossly. “Get your asses out here.”

Above their heads, a security camera panned down to examine them.

After another minute, the door opened, and a walking stereotype stood there, glaring. She was, like, THE grouchy old office lady, from the old-lady grey curls to the sagging cardigan to the glasses on a chain to the sour expression with a cigarette hanging out of it. Even her voice, when she spoke, sounded exactly like Sam would have guessed it would, hoarse and raspy. “Can’t you read the sign? No admittance. Especially not for your kind.” She sneered, and took a drag on the cigarette. “Get lost.”

Guarde pushed Sam forward. “Kid needs the Agency.”

Go to a game store

Navigate to the dungeons and dragons section

Turn your head approximately five degrees either to the left or to the right

Man, I finally finished this thing, aa