I have just updated both Chapter one and added a character description to Mist & Mirrors. The story hasn't changed too much, just the way I wrote it feels more my style. Hope you like the new and improved (imo) version! Stay tuned! ^^ I'll be posting more about my stories on here and Instagram (same username) if you'd like to hear more.
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Ayup to literally any of my followers/ppl who see my posts. I'm gonna be a bit real with you for a sec bc I feel like I gotta get this off my chest and Tumblr is a brick wall where I can put sticky notes. I have not been doing great with the whole mental health thing. My anxiety has been eating me and it's made it hard to do the things I love. I don't ask for help or open up very often. I just want to vent for a bit and this was the best place I could think of.
I feel like I'm stuck in a life that was always my worst nightmare. I don't feel much joy in what I do or where I am right now. This is gonna come off as "my stake is too juicy" problems, I'm aware. I've been forced into going to a second year of college even though I hated the first year. I've got a pretty good job but I feel like I could be doing more. My student debt is looming over me and I don't even have to pay it back yet. I have amazing friends, but I don't feel like they see me the same way. I know they love me but I don't believe myself when I say it. Every time I try to write, the only thing I love, it feels like my head is out of ideas. I guess I just feel like I'm not living up to what anyone wants of me. My parents want me to stay in college and change majors. My friends want me to get my writing out there and find backup plans. I've got this narrative in my head that I have everything I wanted and now it feels like everything is nothing to me. I feel lonely even though I'm surrounded by people who love me. I don't know what to do and I'm running on fumes at this point. My whole life I wanted to connect with people, a special person, but after all this effort I'm stuck with hollow words and abandonment.
I'm not grasping for sympathy, just looking for an outlet I guess. Hope it wasn't a sob story or anything. I'd say I'll have more of my writing out soon but I think for now I just need to refind my motivation. All I'll say is, I'll post when I have something to say.
I'm a little late but; Happy Disability Awareness Month! Hope y'all stay safe and happy. 🩵
🖤❤️💛🤍🩵💚🖤
As someone who's struggled with mental illness, I personally want to say you are not alone and you can get through this. I hope everyone can all find a good support system for themselves this month if they feel they need it. 🫶🫶
I'm loving these comments! We have some amazing comedians with us in the chat lol. @heavenlykira @hussarini @fr0gdud3 y'all made my day with these, great job /gen
Okay, hi! I've returned from the pillow fort and am ready to give my thoughts on TADC 9 but that's gonna be its own mega post that I don't have the time or energy to make rn so you're getting Portal AU update instead. Really long post, be warned.
(if you have seen the original post of my au, here it is, some of the info will be changed in this post)
💬 0 🔁 0 ❤️ 5 · Sooo, I may have had a little idea for an au that combines two things I'm a bit obsessed with. TADC meets Portal SAAC by @c
With Jax's arc the way it was I have been given a new perspective on how things will go. (Also I just don't want it to be a copy of SAAC but w/ 3 ppl.) Here we go, this is gonna be a long one. Minor spoilers for 9 and SAAC by @chubs-deuce under cut
So here's what I have for the story so far. (No idea if I'll actually make it a thing tho) Pomni is a test subject for the Companion Cube Empathy test, she woke up with no memory of who she is. She goes through most of the test with her companion cube, Ragatha, until the very last test. In SAAC Tessa escapes the room and just yanks Nigel but I don't really want Pomni to finish the tests in my version because it would be similar to how she can't escape the circus. Pomni is good at taking the lead but she gets overwhelmed easily when something goes wrong, so having her not finish and wing the rest feels like a better narrative.
Jax is the personality core in charge of the testing, Caine (GLaDOS in this au) let Jax work with humans under careful observation. Caine likes humans but knows he can't trust them after Kinger's escape. (More on that later) Jax is very intrigued by humans but knows he can't get to know them. He actively knows they will die in the end. Because of this, he has a tendency to push the humans to hate him. Oddly enough, however, Pomni doesn't hate him until the very last test. He eventually warms up to Pomni and Ragatha but not after a lot of fighting and developments.
Ragatha is the companion cube Pomni was assigned. The thing is, cubes are not given as much processing power as cores. This means Ragatha cannot see, hear, or speak. At least not the way a human or core would. The way she hears is through vibrations and signals. She can hear Pomni speak and process the words and Jax just gives her signals of what he says for easy communication. There are signal admitters in the testing areas and on cube sanctioned equipment so she knows where things are. And she can hum similar to how a computer makes noise to another computer. Ragatha is very nice and tries to keep Pomni calm but she has a hard time understanding humans.
To go back to what happened to Kinger; he is both Chell and the man in the walls. He used to be part of a two person testing with his wife, Queenie, but when she died after an accident Kinger escaped the testing and left Aperture Science. Caine was very angry with the events, but knew he had to move on. Kinger's current location is unknown.
I'm thinking I'll just have Zooble and Gangle be previous subjects that met their fate. (As far as the story starts) Ribbit and Kaufmo however are two other cores that Jax used to be "friends" with but eventually he pushed them away like he would humans.
The incident that led to Pomni not being able to finish the tests is that when the final test was something she didn't want to complete, she took Ragatha out of the boundaries and lashed out at Jax. Something went wrong in Jax's code and Pomni promised to help him if he helped Ragatha but that didn't go as planned. Now Pomni, Jax, and Ragatha have to work together to escape.
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the hackerbait/scam bots have changed up their wording - I've seen this and another, differently phrased message getting repeatedly used now.
PLEASE DO NOT ENGAGE WITH PEOPLE COMMENTING THAT THEY NEED TO TALK TO YOU ABT SOMETHING IMPORTANT IN DMS.
it is a scare tactic!
They will tell you that they accidentally reported you/your account and that you need to "resolve this with tumblr", maybe even send you a fake email telling you to reach out to someone on discord - IT'S ALL FAKE TO GET YOUR LOGIN DATA SO THEY CAN SPAM THOSE TRICK COMMENTS THROUGH YOUR ACCOUNT TOO.
I will hold off on my thoughts on TADC Last Act so I don't spoil anything. However, I'd like to give the few ppl who see this a bit of advice from my own experience watching it.
Create
Write the show, draw the art, make the craft. Create as much as you want and do not be afraid of if people like it or not because it will reach people who love it more than anything. Your stories, your worlds will mean something to people the way your favorite show means to you. There are millions of thousands of untold stories because people are worried it won't be loved but it will. You have every power to create the next show that will make people cry, laugh, and feel seen. All you have to do is Create.
Happy (late) birthday to the Blade! I don't talk about it much on here but Techno was a huge inspiration and comfort creator for me. Hope his family is doing well during this week 🙏
Okay, I know I sound like a broken record when I say; I'm delaying chapter 3 of Mist & Mirrors again. Here me out. It wasn't going in a direction I liked in the first draft so I had to start the chapter over and rewrite it. Idk how long that'll take, but I'll work on it as much as I can. Very sorry for the delay again, hopefully I'll get it in soon. Stay tuned ^^
Sooo, I may have had a little idea for an au that combines two things I'm a bit obsessed with. TADC meets Portal SAAC by @chubs-deuce.
Pomni is an Aperture Science test subject for the Companion Cube Empathy test. She is given a companion cube named Ragatha. The Aperture Science personality core administering the test is Jax. I'm using the lore that personality cores are from human templates that Chubs had in her au. So Jax becomes human somehow (haven't decided how yet) and I'm thinking it would be interesting if Ragatha also became human but since she's a companion cube I'm not fully sure how that would go.
Caine is taking GLaDOS' place. I think it would be interesting if Kinger and Queenie were Chell and Whitley but they both escape and neither is evil. Maybe instead of one being a core it's that they were both human they did the paired tests from the co-op in the second game. (They were meant to at least). Bubble was the core that guided them in Whitley's place and was the evil one. But Caine kept him around after; as the disembodied processing system in the cores.
Gangle and Ribbit were previous test subjects for Jax, Zooble and Kaufmo were their companions respectively. But they both became cores after the tests were done. Jax doesn't know that though.
That's all I've got so far, I might try fleshing stuff out later. Stay tuned ^^
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These are some Compact designs I made for @chubs-deuce. It's for their Portal fic; Self As A Construct. That fic needs more love tbh, it's really good. Hope you like them Chubs ^^ the orange is for Nigel and the blue is for Tessa. Feel free to give them names and personalities if you'd like. Lmk if you have any questions about it
Been a minute huh, sorry about that. Busy week after Lvlup. I met a lot of fun cosplayers, got some merch of my girl Ragatha, and even met the Amanda Hufford! That was an amazing experience, I look up to them quite a bit so that was great. I'm hard at work on chapter 3 of Mist & Mirrors, sorry for the delay, and have some plans for the Royal Jester au coming up. Along with some persona stuff that might be on YouTube in the future. Stay tuned ^^
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Doing a Portal 2 speed run, I can't record the game but I got through the first 3 chapters in an hour. I think it's fun to just go through a game you like as fast as you can and not expect to be the best. If y'all are curious I'll post my score each day until I finish (might finish tomorrow if I have the time in my schedule)
Also I plan on posting Chapter 2 of Mist & Mirrors tomorrow at 2:00pm CT on AO3. Stay tuned ^^
I know I just posted but I wanted to put this separately; I'm hard at work for Mist & Mirrors and can't wait to share more. And, in the near future, I might just have some more persona stuff coming up so stay tuned for that. I'm really looking forward to doing more on my other socials now that I have Mist & Mirrors going. Stay tuned ^^