"So much will happen", he thinks, "that I would want to tell you."
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@mwnimii
"So much will happen", he thinks, "that I would want to tell you."

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John Keats, from a letter to Fanny Brawne, featured in The Selected Letters of John Keats
i've mistaken the ache in my chest for hope
The thing is, Ryan wants Naim to stay so fucking badly. He asks like 4 times in 60 seconds —
Do you like it here? What do you like about this place? So nothing then? There’s nothing you like about this place?
DO YOU LIKE IT HERE. And while it is his way of asking “do you like ME” I also think he’s being so completely literal.
Ryan does not think he’s ever going to leave. It’s where he grew up, it’s where his family is, he probably already knows what job he will have when he graduates, and which bar will sell him his first legal drink, and every issue in the house he’s going to inherit. He knows what the rest of his life is going to look like and I don’t even necessarily think he hates it but GOD wouldn’t it be better if Naim stayed.
He KNOWs you think this place is a shit hole but please for the love of god find something you like so you have a reason to stay — because he doesn’t think he’s going to be enough.
He’s terrified because this is his home, and he wants you, and you hate it here. He has found things he likes about this place, and he needs you to find them too, so he has something he can point to when you try to cut and run. IM SICK
name moodboard: order for "ae" | ♫ now playing: maybe it's not our fault by yerin baek

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on wanting and standing it
"So We Must Meet Apart" by Gabrielle Bates and Jennifer S. Cheng // "I cannot live with You (640)" by Emily Dickinson // People We Meet on Vacation by Emily Henry // Brokeback Mountain by Annie Proulx // "I SHALL NOT WANT" by peargirl20 // "Molly Brodak" by Molly Brodak // "Famously Close" by Al Olender // "Pushing It Down and Praying" by Lizzy McAlpine // "Litany in Which Certain Things Are Crossed Out" by Richard Siken
want them so fucking bad it’s like i need water in the middle of the night bad
on wanting and standing it
"So We Must Meet Apart" by Gabrielle Bates and Jennifer S. Cheng // "I cannot live with You (640)" by Emily Dickinson // People We Meet on Vacation by Emily Henry // Brokeback Mountain by Annie Proulx // "I SHALL NOT WANT" by peargirl20 // "Molly Brodak" by Molly Brodak // "Famously Close" by Al Olender // "Pushing It Down and Praying" by Lizzy McAlpine // "Litany in Which Certain Things Are Crossed Out" by Richard Siken
on repression, shame and intimacy issues

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Peter Murdoch I am so sorry for ever hating you you just had horrendous tummy problems you did not want to disclose to literally anyone
Katabasis, by R. F. Kuang
All this time they’d both been drowning, and thinking the other was gloating at them from the shore
I was saving caps of God's Own country and, I'd never thought about it before (despite having seen the film about 17 times), but the scene where Gheorghe takes the lightbulb from the ceiling fixture in the caravan and puts it in the lamp, changing the light in the room from dim and cold to flooding the room with warmth and a soft glow is such a beautiful illustration of the way he transforms Johnny's life from something cold and stark to brimming with warmth and love and comfort
And it also shows how, where Johnny sees the situation and his life in general as shite and that’s just how it is, that’s how it’ll always be, and you just have to get on with it (because this is what he’s been taught), Gheorghe comes along with an outside perspective and shows that some things can be changed. It doesn’t have to be the way it’s always been. There is a way out of the darkness. Maybe this sounds wanky, but I love little details like this and I have no idea how I never noticed it before!
“Intimacy doesn’t come naturally to man who has been raised in a household where caring is expressed through work; (…) even a gesture as innocuous as two fingertips grazing each other is a dramatic moment, practically accompanied by a silent fanfare of trumpets.” – Guy Lodge, Variety
GOD’S OWN COUNTRY (2017) dir. Francis Lee
GOD'S OWN COUNTRY 2017 | dir. Francis Lee

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GOD'S OWN COUNTRY (2017) dir. Francis Lee
MATERIALISTS (2025) @qvynrand