animals fan blog (all)

dark chocolate .... one of life’s little tortures

oh you wanted some chocolate? of course. here you go. it’s the kind that’s bad though

Fuck you op.

perhaps you’d be less bitter if you ate chocolate that tasted good

thought of great gatsby au on a walk and had to spend the rest of the walk trying so so hard not to start laughing really loudly and looking like an insane person. i won’t elaborate but trust me it’s so funny

no actually i think i will elaborate so i can let this idea die here. polnareff moves to west egg next to eccentric new-money billionaire noriaki kakyoin (obvious disclaimer there is no weird subtext btwn them i am not evil) and goes to visit his friend jotaro over in east egg where he meets jotaro’s other friend abdul who he gets to know pretty well and hits it off with. meanwhile kakyoin constantly throws lavish parties to attract the attention of jotaro from across the bay because when they were teenagers they had a budding romance that never actually went anywhere. eventually it works and they start a tentative relationship even though jotaro is married but its okay because jotaro’s wife is also cheating on him with hol horse, who lives with dio and is under the impression that they are heterosexual life mates while dio is conversely under the impression they are married and hol horse is just extremely chaste. but then one day when they’re all going out together on the way back jotaro (who is driving the car w kakyoin) accidentally hits hol horse with his car and he dies so dio blames kakyoin and goes and kills him and leaves him floating dead in a pool. this does not qualify as a shakespearean-style tragedy however because like a shakespearean comedy, it ends in a wedding (avpol). also iggy is the oculist whose eyes see all :+) i have not read this book since i was 15.