WHAT IS GOD TO YOUR WIFE

coffee shop au with canon-typical violence

flirtatiously saying "oh, you can choose what i should eat!" at a restaurant and your date orders ten cheeseburgers for you

They say ooooh be a good boy for daddy and you'll get a reward. But then the reward is just gay sex. This is bullshit. I wanted a skateboard

Then they say if you're a bad boy daddy will punish you. But what's the punishment? More gay sex! You can't escape it. This whole damn place is in the pocket of Big Sex

saddest thing that can happen is a cat so delicately and cozy putting their small apple head on your leg like a pillow to sleep while fully unaware that in like five minutes you're going to get up to go eat because they don't know human language or how time works

I am consuming a media and you are going to hear about it

no amount of butter or salt removes the nutrients from vegetables