me at me: you can’t jsut door dash donuts everytime you get off a 24!
me: ok this time it’s bagels then
🤦🏻♀️
NASA
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open

#extradirty
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
noise dept.
Mike Driver
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
ojovivo
Cosimo Galluzzi
Monterey Bay Aquarium

Janaina Medeiros
$LAYYYTER
Cosmic Funnies

祝日 / Permanent Vacation

Andulka
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

almost home

Product Placement
todays bird

seen from United States

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@motleysaint
me at me: you can’t jsut door dash donuts everytime you get off a 24!
me: ok this time it’s bagels then
🤦🏻♀️

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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it's really funny how the entire world basically just blew the fuck up six short years ago and nobody wants to admit that that may have had some lasting consequences lmao
like so much of Everything today is premised on the idea that the earth-shattering catastrophe which happened within living memory of everyone older than a third grader has had no meaningful material or psychological effects on the general public and i don't think that's good, lol.
"(some of) the top-line economic indicators (sorta) recovered (in most places) so everything is fine and we don't need to talk about it" is not a sustainable framework for interfacing with reality
"why is everyone so angry and paranoid now?" "why is politics so dysfunctional now?" "why is [x] [y] and [z] now? blah blah blah"
2020:
If you want me, I'll be in the bookstore smelling the paperbacks like a pervert.
shoutout to everyone dealing with. thhe fucking difficulty
the fact that all of my mutuals immediately reblogged this from me really says something about all of us, doesn't it
sometimes you dont know what youre signing yourself up for

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(guy who is wearing all yellow voice) Boy i sure hope no one looks at me in a noticeable way
like can we be serious for a moment please. Use our brain
How's Curious George doing btw
hey. That was devastating
Thats the context for this meme???
I feel like I've been robbed the whole time. This is magical.
I'm dying

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current state of the internet is a FUCKING EMBARASSMENT. was chatting with my grandma bout the history of crochet and knitting (and the comparative ages of those respective technologies) and i was like "oh YEAH and also that ancient greek fiber art we partly figured out from chemically testing the scoured bleached pigments of stolen statuary (tumblr knows what im talking about)—gimme 30 seconds to look up the name."
5 minutes and 3 search-engines later i am crying tears of blood screaming spitting blubbering in despair as my grandma attempts to digitally pat me consolingly on the back. the library of alexandria didn't burn it was "restructured" to "increase shareholder profits"
and i STILL CANNOT FIND THE TERM.
i am scouring the internet like the victorians scoured and destroyed all trace of joy and color from stolen relics for the LOST NAME OF THE ANCIENT PROCESS of textile-creation akin to knitting/crocheting/nålebinding that at least one academic/crafter used to recreate the leggings on this Glorious Motherfucker:
the google execs erased it. they bleached my bestie AGAIN from history...
is this of any use
SO IT IS!!!
Archer statue from the Temple of Aphaia (ca. 480 BC) next to a reconstruction of its original paint job:
The leggings and sleeves would have created using a method called SPRANG which predates knitting and is over 3,000 years old. What's even sexier is modern artisans managed to recreate the entire outfit using the original method!
Mmm-HMM, love me a shapely thigh in harlequin hosiery. Put👏men👏in👏clingy-ass👏clothing👏again👏👏👏
Unfortunately english sources are hard to find, partly because Google's a shithole, but also because this textile project comes from a German museum, in Germany, where people tend to speak (and publish) in German. That said, the original link is to a short-but-sweet article I would have had no problem finding in 30 seconds a mere few years ago. fortunately i have clever beautiful insane people following me, but alas not everyone has such luxury. thanks to everyone in the notes who shoved themselves down this rabbithole with me!
in conclusion let us take a moment to sincerely wish Google a very burn in hell🙏
i had the best human interaction of all time last night. i was sitting at a bar eating an appetizer and this guy comes up to order a drink and stares at my food and comments how good it looks. when i am drunk i use the word bitch like it is a comma, i plug it into any space in a sentence possible. so naturally the first thing i say to this stranger is, “go ahead and take one, bitch.”
he looks SO shocked and taken aback and goes “what did you just say? how do you know my name?” so i sit there for a moment trying to figure out what the fuck he is talking about, and then go, “…. bitch?” and he looks so relieved and tells me his name is mitch.
i cannot stop thinking about this. oh my god. imagine going into a bar and someone you know for a fact youve never met approaches you and says “go ahead and take one, mitch.” im cracking the fuck up. he looked like he thought this was the fucking truman show
I’m at the point where my meds don’t fit confortably in my pill organizer, and I’m this close to buying a bunch of plastic capsules and a gumball machine and calling it a day.
Gotta get one of those three in ones
... I should have known better than to post this to tumblr. Y’all just pilot my lack of impulse control like a mech at this point.
Feel like it was very much like, you’re going through the worst summer of your life and I have a mustache, we all have stuff rn, maybe let’s kiss?
YOU’RE GOING THROUGH THE WORST SUMMER OF YOUR LIFE AND I HAVE A MUSTACHE

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about to try physical therapy and my poor PT has no idea what he is about to get into