Mort

fujoshis who are not that into men or not into men at all are very funny to me. I loveeeee reading explicit fanfiction about two guys having sex. i see a shirtless guy in real life and i’m like okay so who asked for that

Has anyone ever thought about boobs before

250 years of the United States here's to another 0 more 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

controversial stance but i do wish i could live forever. i certainly live like i'm going to live forever. i take my time. realistically however my lifespan is dreadfully limited and there are things i've "been meaning to do" that i will never get around to. the Emoji Movie came out almost 10 years ago. in all that time on any random day i could've decided to sit down and watch it, and i did not. how many more decades will slip by like this? conceivably, it could be all the decades i have left. watching the Emoji Movie would not be, after all, a crucial use of my time. much better things to do. i could easily postpone it over and over and over until my final breath where it may not even register to me that i never did watch the Emoji Movie. no great loss, certainly; and yet i find myself intrigued by Patrick Stewart's involvement

SMOKED SALMON IS THE ONLY THING THAT NUMBS THE PAIN

okay but we can't know for sure that the loud noise and bright flash offstage—which occurred after the character who was holding the gun exited the stage with it—was a gunshot, because we didn't get to directly see it

a squirrel or perhaps a cardinal posted this

sorry america but you’ve been really mean. and I don’t want to go to your birthday party in two days

what’s the mood for july?

Nobody should buy GTA til they free Arion Kurtaj

What with GTA VI going up for pre-order i'd just like to remind everyone that rockstar conspired with the UK government to lock an 18-year-old away for life for hacking them.