Mortified And Awesome

everywhere BUT behind me- at least a foot away, that is where people ARE at any god damned checkout.

I would wear a shirt with a warning!, the only problem is, it would need to be printed on the shoulders as well, and people would need to be able to read.

I could hear some hobblescuffle plop in this morning when I was in the process of paying, I just knew, I just knew, and lo and behold, straight from their far too large RV comes some hospice warrior fresh out of the grave, obviously they need to lean so close that my arm had to brush against them while entering my PIN.

Oh but wait! That poor individual! NO!! It happens with all manner of beings of any age or shape. At lunch, the good old boy type who has to jaw with the cashier before, during, and after entering a business, WHY NOT sit on my lap even though I'm standing at a counter with my purchases. HEE HAWWWW titty behind the counter will surely fuck you soon!

Teen adventures!? Try to deflect the summer heat by being as close to my back as you can with your music video? Which is blaring on your phone? At the same time you're video chatting? Somebody who's talking about getting something removed! That's right cool cat, you do need to get it the fuck out of there. Don't let Tepp see, whatever fuck name you said!!