Yoga Journey

the feelings are there always there bubbling under the surface. they’re asking for your courage to look. they want to be felt need to be felt darling those walls are just a facade delaying the inevitable feel they’re asking feel they’re begging it’s easier to distract avoid repress swipe eat drink smoke fuck until the walls break feel you are held it will be okay. Photo by @dariaxtaylor (at Windansea Beach) https://www.instagram.com/p/CCWo4rUlxwU/?igshid=1gsv8cci17b4b

The snails come out when it rains. The world is wet and they can go anywhere… slowly. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Rain is a rare event in southern California’s summer. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Having lived with seasonal depression in NY and Chicago for most my life, the rain has always been a reminder from the earth to slow down. The air was heavy, a weight on my body, pressing on my lungs making it hard to breathe. Only rarely did I listen and heed her advice. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ But here in SoCal, the sun comes out every day. Even in May Gray and June Gloom, the soft layer of clouds melts away by the afternoon, and I thrive, solar powered. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ It rained this week, 2.5 months since the last time, and I heeded mother Earth’s advice. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Squatting down on the sidewalk, I watched a snail glide to the grass. Camouflaged amongst dewy towers of green were a dozen more snails! Tiny ones, big ones, their shells proportional to their bodies. Funny little eye stalks. I remembered how their bodies shrivel away from foreign touch and I let them be, simply amused. To the passerby, I’m a strange girl squatting on the sidewalk. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Suddenly a sharp pain jolts through my neck and back and I stand up, distracted from the snails. I can barely move my head without shooting pain. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Rain. Slow down. Snails. Slow down. Pain. Slow down. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Every step, every breath, every movement became mindful. Any sudden movement caused pain to shoot through me. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Of course, I looked up the spirit animal message from Snail. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ She is asking me to slow down and stay present. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I’ve been goal-oriented, attached to outcomes, and forcing things to happen on my timeline. She reminds me that The Universe has its own timeline. Trust and surrender. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Okay Universe. I’m listening. (at San Diego, California) https://www.instagram.com/p/CCRLlPEl6d2/?igshid=1tt04elejsp5t

Happy Independence Day! Check out this gorgeous goddess portrait made by @hopemagick of me as Artemis, goddess of the moon, the hunt, psychic abilities, herbs, and sacred sexuality! Artemis is the wild goddess. To me, to be wild is to be free and independent, to be unapologetically authentic. ✨❤️🤍💙✨ https://www.instagram.com/p/CCOmoJdFtBO/?igshid=5ocmihxup5w6

Have you been feeling the density of the past few weeks? Everything that’s been bubbling under the surface was brought to light and I was forced to face it. I have either been on the verge of tears or straight up sobbing, and the smallest things are triggering me. As challenging as these times are, they’re also some of my favorites because it’s an opportunity for quantum leaps in growth… if we have the courage to face it. Being by yourself ≠ being with yourself. It’s so easy to distract and avoid. We all have our go-to methods that have become so automatic that we don’t even realize we’re doing it. Getting lost in mindless scrolling and downing a pint of ice cream are mine. It used to be shopping. I don’t know about you, but I almost never feel better by avoiding. It keeps squashing down the emotions that want to, need to, rise up. You might have heard (or used) the phrase, “feel your feelings.” Last week, I was laying in bed, feeling triggered AF by a conversation gone wrong, guilt from my own mistakes, and feeling disconnected from my partner. I let actually myself feel the shittiness of the moment. I noticed where in my body this sensation was located. What shape. What color. What texture. What sound. And I just breathed through the discomfort. I didn’t try to reason with it, rationalize it, or even name it. I simply experienced it. And within minutes, it softened its grip on me. I am deeply affected by external energies and go through highs and lows frequently. I love being in the highs, who doesn’t? But I’ve been practicing embracing the lows, giving myself grace, being gentle with myself, and simply accepting the ebb and flow without trying to change it. By allowing and not resisting, it actually makes the low moments much easier to navigate through. Whatever you’re feeling is okay. It is human, and that’s why we’re here. To experience the full range of humanity through highs and lows. Welcome to the feels. We are in the waters of Cancer season ♋️ 🦀. . Photo by @dariaxtaylor https://www.instagram.com/p/CCMJBYElD1L/?igshid=gwfvmrawxfsj

Full Moon Circle for the Capricorn Lunar Eclipse. This Full Moon and Lunar Eclipse, we will root into our intuition and highest authentic vibration, and remember our connection and responsibility to the collective. In our sacred ceremony, we will journey on a vision quest, journal, share what's on our hearts, celebrate, and release the cycle behind us to move forward with renewed energy. Come as you are, your whole self is welcome. Friday, July 3 5-7pm Pacific / 8-10pm Eastern Online Donation Based Sign up: https://monalunalove.com/new-events/online-full-moon-for-women-in-capricorn https://www.instagram.com/p/CCJvdktBb0o/?igshid=r2y9taz4duev

Years ago, I realized I had a shopping addiction and dug myself into a hole over $10,000 deep. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I couldn’t talk about it. What would people think of me? Guilt stacked on me with each purchase, sending me deeper into debt. I didn’t know how to stop either. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ My wake-up call came one glorious summer day in 2018 as I stood in line, about to swipe my credit card for some fancy dresses that I didn't need, but felt like I "HAD to have." I had $5 in my checking account and over $8,000 in credit card debt. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I kept telling myself, "I can put the dresses down and walk away," but my body was frozen. I couldn't will myself out of the line. I felt impulsive and reckless. I knew I was digging myself even deeper into debt but I couldn't stop myself. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I handed over my card, feeling my stomach already clenched with guilt, knowing the shame that would come soon after, while also excited for the rush of buying something new. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ This was the moment I chose to make a BIG change. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ In my journey to financial freedom, I started to mention the debt in conversations. I got a lot of looks of horror and pity, which made me shrink even smaller. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ But I owned it. I took responsibility for getting myself into the mess and I was determined to pull myself out. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I saw the weight of shame that many of us carry with money. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 💜🌿💜 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ TABOO TALK // MONEY ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Unwind your shame around the taboo subjects of money and debt. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Remaining silent about our shame perpetuates it and keeps it stored in our subconscious and our bodies, causing us to stay isolated and separate, and can even lead to physical manifestations such as disease. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “If we can share our story with someone who responds with empathy and understanding, shame can't survive.” ~ Brené Brown ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ This is a safe and intimate space to share our experiences, guilt, fear, and shame around money and debt so that we may liberate ourselves to feel the freedom and and abundance we desire. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Thursday, July 2, 2020 5-7pm PDT Online FREE ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Comment 💚 or DM me to sign up. https://www.instagram.com/p/CB6ZmQuDPoK/?igshid=1ph8firzu7s38

When a giant wave washes over you 10 minutes into the photoshoot... New Moon Circle this Saturday! These have been filling up before the announcement makes its way to social media so if you want to get in on the magic, comment YES or send me a DM so I can get you on the email list so you can be the first to know! . 🌊🌑🌊 . This New Moon, we will drop into the Oceanic depths of the Soul, call in the heart of the Great Mother, as we hold space for & birth a new world. In our sacred ceremony, we will journey on a vision quest, journal, share what's on our hearts, and set an intention for the upcoming moon cycle. Come as you are, your whole self is welcome. Saturday, June 20, 2020 5-7pm PDT Online via Zoom Comment link plz or DM me for the link to sign up! This circle is part of @thewildwomanproject and is open to to all self-identifying womxn, non-binary, and femme-identifying folx. PS ISHA fam: I’m also leading a circle on Friday June 19 from 7-9pm Central / 5-7pm Pacific! . Photo by @dariaxtaylor https://www.instagram.com/p/CBhEFAsDB4I/?igshid=1pp6ni6ixzaqm

Reminder: we’re in this for the long haul. We’ve been living in systems of oppression for millenia, and the racial oppression in the US for centuries. Collectively, we are at the beginning of a New Paradigm, the Aquarian Age, which is a shift away from duality and hierarchical structure and into equality and oneness. The Aquarian Age spans the next 2,000 years. Knowing this is the work of the collective, it’s too easy to brush aside and hand the responsibility over to someone else. But we all play a part in the tapestry of oneness. We are at a critical time to dismantle our own racism and prejudice and inquire how we’ve perpetuated oppression and/or how we’ve internalized oppression. It takes a combination of inner work and outer action. This isn’t going to be solved this week. Reminder: we all process in our own time. If you’re at full capacity, take time for yourself. When you’ve refueled your own cup, allocate time and energy to the inner and outer work. As with all personal and spiritual development, keep moving forward with the knowledge that you will be uncomfortable. You will be facing your shadows. And the only way out is through. Reminder: When it is time to act, let your actions come from integrity. If it’s coming from a place of guilt, it’s a sure way to lead to resentment and burnout. We are in this for the long haul. Keep taking care of yourself in this collective movement to uplift our fellow Black humans. In conversations this week, a few other themes have come to light. Shame and Connection. There’s many conflicting voices on social media about the “right” thing to do and many voices that are shaming each other. Like guilt, motivating people through shame will only perpetuate oppression. It keeps us feeling small and feeling less than. Shame causes us to shrink, hide, and avoid the one thing that dissolves shame: vulnerability through connection. Connection to each other’s humanness is part of how we remember that we are all one, and if you’re hurting, I’m hurting. Connection is how we break down barriers of us vs them. Connection is how we eradicate the fear caused by separation, and fear that perpetuates scarcity and oppression. (at Chicago, Illinois) https://www.instagram.com/p/CA_lAfvFU7k/?igshid=goyxhqucv2mk

Reminder: we’re in this for the long haul. We’ve been living in systems of oppression for millenia, and the racial oppression in the US for centuries. Collectively, we are at the beginning of a New Paradigm, the Aquarian Age, which is a shift away from duality and hierarchical structure and into equality and oneness. The Aquarian Age spans the next 2,000 years. Knowing this is the work of the collective, it’s too easy to brush aside and hand the responsibility over to someone else. But we all play a part in the tapestry of oneness. We are at a critical time to dismantle our own racism and prejudice and inquire how we’ve perpetuated oppression and/or how we’ve internalized oppression. It takes a combination of inner work and outer action. This isn’t going to be solved this week. Reminder: we all process in our own time. If you’re at full capacity, take time for yourself. When you’ve refueled your own cup, allocate time and energy to the inner and outer work. As with all personal and spiritual development, keep moving forward with the knowledge that you will be uncomfortable. You will be facing your shadows. And the only way out is through. Reminder: When it is time to act, let your actions come from integrity. If it’s coming from a place of guilt, it’s a sure way to lead to resentment and burnout. We are in this for the long haul. Keep taking care of yourself in this collective movement to uplift our fellow Black humans. In conversations this week, a few other themes have come to light. Shame and Connection. There’s many conflicting voices on social media about the “right” thing to do and many voices that are shaming each other. Like guilt, motivating people through shame will only perpetuate oppression. It keeps us feeling small and feeling less than. Shame causes us to shrink, hide, and avoid the one thing that dissolves shame: vulnerability through connection. Connection to each other’s humanness is part of how we remember that we are all one, and if you’re hurting, I’m hurting. Connection is how we break down barriers of us vs them. Connection is how we eradicate the fear caused by separation, and fear that perpetuates scarcity and oppression. (at Chicago, Illinois) https://www.instagram.com/p/CA_k6qGFkIJ/?igshid=u6nzhhyvqamw

Jumping with JOY!!!! I freaking LOVE my clients so much. I'm in awe of every single one of them. My clients show up to dig into the hard work and the hard questions. They are incredible healers and space-holders. And they’re working on their belief system to step into the highest version of themselves that they KNOW is possible. That I also see is possible. And it’s anchoring into my own truth: I'm here to bring out the light that is already within you. That is what the most impactful coaches in my life have done for me. They’ve encouraged me to come back to my truth and my authenticity. They’ve reminded me of how fucking powerful I already am, without the tips and tricks and tools and huge following and whatever external systems I thought I needed to have in order to be enough. You. Are. Enough. What really helped me integrate this belief is releasing the idea that I need to be “ahead” of, or know more in order to help people. By doing the work on myself: expanding to the highest version of myself, visioning, and practicing being in that state every single day, it creates the space for my clients to do the same. We don’t need to be “ahead” of people to coach or guide people on their healing path. We just have to hold the expanded state of infinite possibility for them and guide them to step into it. Again. And again. And again. Until the practice becomes integrated and embodied. . ✨🌙✨ . Join me and 11 incredible women if you’re ready to make your wildest dreams your reality. Radiant Goddess is for heart-centered and impact-driven women. You’ll journey into the depths of your soul to awaken the courage and confidence already within you to shine your light and gifts into the world. P.S. Thank you @daynalisa and @leliachristine for changing my life. (at San Diego, California) https://www.instagram.com/p/CAv5UoBDjKj/?igshid=uwe63dtdf44l

Radiant Goddess is OPEN! You’re on this Earth for a reason. YOU KNOW… You’re here to create epic change. You’re here to pave your own path. You’re here to heal yourself and remember your wholeness. You are here to uplift the lives of others. You are a healer and visionary leader. You're here for something more. You’ve always been a rebel, determined to do things your own way. You’ve always craved the freedom and courage to be fully authentically yourself. And you’ve been through soooooo much. A lifetime of conditioning from family and society has covered up the truth of who you are. Expectations and “shoulds” have been laid upon you, causing you to act out of integrity from a place of obligation, guilt, and shame. You have… Worn masks in order to hide your true self so you could fit in and be accepted. Dimmed your own light for the comfort of others. Silenced yourself and your needs. Put everyone else’s desires before your own. Been unable to make decisions out of fear of getting it wrong. Felt like you have to be perfect in order to receive love. Felt like you are too much. Felt like you aren’t enough. Goddess, There is another way to live. One of freedom and empowerment. Regardless of what’s happened in our lives, we can return to our inner power and the truth of who we are to heal ourselves. Full empowerment blooms from full responsibility. You have the power within to reclaim the Sovereignty of your Queendom, and embody the Goddess you are. . ✨🌙✨ . With the support of our Sacred Sisterhood, we will journey together to uncover and rediscover your inner radiance. Our journey spirals through 7 portals to unlock the codes within you to come home to the acceptance of who you are, and re-awaken your inner trust, power, abundance, and freedom. Join us for this life changing journey. Message me for the details. . ✨🌙✨ . Photo by @dariaxtaylor (at San Diego, California) https://www.instagram.com/p/CAtKY0ZDgxL/?igshid=1fltzti0hlmu5

For as long as I can remember, I’ve wanted to live in Southern California. There was something about the surf and skate culture that I was drawn to. But for as long as I can remember, my dad would tell me that SoCal was so expensive. So I ruled it out. “I can’t afford to live there.” That’s the belief I held onto for most of my life. Deep down though, I knew it was THE place for me. I wanted sun, warmth, ocean, mountains, and the laid-back, slower way of living. But I squashed the desire down. “It’s too expensive.” I considered other places and even visited some, but nothing felt right. It was always missing one piece of what I truly wanted. A light bulb went on one day. WHO CARES if it’s too expensive?? It’s where I want to live. So I’ll MAKE THE MONEY to live there! After making that switch in my belief, both my real-world practical actions and the magical synchronicities of the Universe began to align to get me to SoCal. Now I’m here. Living my dream life. Basking in the sun. Walking through wildflowers along the bay with mountains in the distance. Surfing every week. . “Your beliefs become your thoughts, Your thoughts become your words, Your words become your actions, Your actions become your habits, Your habits become your values, Your values become your destiny.” . Your deepest desires are within your reach and shifting your mindset has the incredible power to shift everything else in your life. . ✨🌙✨ . Are you ready for an epic transformation that feels like magic? Join me and 11 other incredible womxn for Radiant Goddess. We begin on the magical eclipse, solstice, and new moon portal on June 20. Message me for details. (at Cardiff-by-the-Sea, California) https://www.instagram.com/p/CAqPyDqjebu/?igshid=1kxklrt25xrn0

Morning light streams through the windows, casting a golden glow, waking me up. Jeff the dog and I walk along the San Diego bay’s bird sanctuary, pausing to breathe in the flora and delight in the fauna. Fresh lemon squeezed into my favorite mug, a trickle of sweet honey, and hot water poured over, steam rising. My morning potion. Big breaths bring my attention into my body. I ask, “what do you need right now?” The answer varies. Journal. There’s so much clattering around my brain and I need to get it all on paper. Meditate. I’m scatterbrained and I need to come back to centered focus. Movement. I need to move the energy through my body. Clean. There’s too much visual clutter and grubbiness and I need to put the dishes away and vacuum. Some days require it all. Some days, my energy shifts quickly after just one of these and I’m ready to begin work. This is the morning routine I’ve dreamed of and created through fluid discipline. Consistency plus the awareness to tune in and ask what I need. Your dream days are possible. Gratitude for what you currently have. Envision and feel what your dream life is like. Release what’s no longer serving you. Practice practice practice. Are you ready to come home to the peace of your inner temple and expand to the possibility of your wildest dreams? This is just a glimpse of what we’ll be learning and putting into practice in Radiant Goddess. Intrigued? Send me a DM. I’d love to hear about where you are now and where you want to be. Let’s clear the path to get you there. ✨🌙✨ (at Imperial Beach, California) https://www.instagram.com/p/CAnwSNCl-mW/?igshid=1xoztgfin4uls

That feeling of fulfillment that you’re searching for? Maybe you’re looking for it in the next job, the perfect partner, where you live, or the next vacation. But it’s just that- a feeling. It comes from within you. From slowing down enough to quiet the external voices. To clear out the noise long enough to hear your own heart. It comes from full presence and connection with your inner and outer world. It’s in hearing your own breath. It’s in feeling the subtle hum of your body. It’s in watching a father teach his daughter how to skip rocks. It’s in the way the sidewalk glitters. It’s in the sprouts in the cement cracks bursting to the light. It’s in the fur of your dog’s ear. Fulfillment is right here, right now. Pause long enough to feel it. (at Imperial Beach, California) https://www.instagram.com/p/CAgV_YnBacL/?igshid=1sqviw0nqrq4m

Announcing the next Circle: New Moon in Gemini - Music of the Howl This New Moon, we will share in music, listen deeply & howl to our heart’s content. Music is medicine and has the ability to shift our energy, heal, and be a comfort through challenging times. Through the art of listening with presence, we can quiet the noise in our minds to have a full body experience of the magic that is all around us. Saturday, May 23, 2020 5-7pm PST Online via Zoom FREE + Donations Welcome Sign up here https://monalunalove.com/new-events/2020/5/23/new-moon-in-gemini or DM me for the link. Space is limited to create depth and intimacy. There's also a circle on Friday from 7-9pm Central with @innersensehealingarts . DM me for details on how to join. . 🌙 . A scoop on how circles will look going forward: New Moon Circles - New Moons are for slowing down, new beginnings, and intention-setting for the moon cycle ahead. - An intimate gathering of up to 10 womxn. This gives us an opportunity to genuinely connect with each other and give everyone a chance to speak and be heard. - During Quarantine, I will be leading 2 New Moon Circles: one solely for you and this community, and the other through @innersensehealingarts. They will be the same theme and guided vision quest. You are welcome to join either one! - Part of @thewildwomanproject - Takes place on or near the New Moon Full Moon Ceremony - Full Moons are for celebration! - BIG energy! Big group. This is open to all womxn. - Co-lead with @amandamariebb (aka @bluelightningbb) and will be a combination of vision quest and dance. There will be some sharing but it will be more open, less intimate. - Takes place on or near the Full Moon Both are open to all self-identifying womxn, non-binary, and femme-identifying folx. Photo by @lauren.oberlin https://www.instagram.com/p/CAdfthCDyHT/?igshid=prrbzbfvp9g2

Have you ever collapsed into a puddle of laughter and tears? That just happened to me. Something unlocked. The secrets. The key to the Universe. They’re things I’ve known all along. That you’ve known all along. Ready? . . . . . The key to achieving your dreams is *believing in yourself.* Simple, right? You’re probably thinking, “duh.” But it’s one thing to *know* and another to fully *embody* it. Imagine this: Inside you is a brilliant light. Over the course of being a human, you absorbed everything around you. Ideas and beliefs from your family and society. You learned to emulate those around you in order to survive. You took on beliefs that were not your own. But you’re no longer a child. You're a grown-ass woman with your own values, beliefs, and ideas. But there’s still that part of you, the Inner Critic, Inner Bully, who whispers (or sometimes shouts) things at you that make you shrink in fear and doubt. And you retreat. You hide. It’s too big and too scary to step out of your comfort zone. But the light is still there. Sister, the pathway to embody unconditional belief in yourself is a process of uncovering and deconditioning what have become your habitual beliefs and actions to rediscover that light within you. The light has always been within you. Shine with me, Sister. Radiant Goddess is for the womxn who knows she is on this earth to make an epic impact in the lives of others. We’ll journey together with the support of 13 incredible womxn like you for you to expand beyond your wildest dreams and be the light you know you are. Radiant Goddess is open for registration. DM me if you’re ready. . ✨🌙✨ . Photo by @dariaxtaylor (at San Diego, California) https://www.instagram.com/p/CAa4qyHBUiv/?igshid=1vu25fotvcavn

DOLL This is what you want me to be. Pretty in frills. Sit still and shut the fuck up. Do as you’re told. Respect your elders. Your elders know best. The perfect Chinese daughter. Ivy League Status. Doctor, Lawyer, Accountant. This is success. This makes you look good. “Saving face” is what matters. Because fuck me and what I want. I’m just your doll. Your puppet. To move as you please. . But Mother, You have forgotten. Who you are and who I am. But I remember. I remember for you. I remember for me. For your mother and her mother. For our sisters, and our aunties. For all the women. I remember. . I scream this because I CAN. We are the Wild Radiant Goddess . We are POWERFUL. We are LOUD We can be who we are. And do what we want. We are smart. We are beautiful. We are SEXUAL. And the most threatening of all As the Goddess We know ourselves. We trust ourselves. We love ourselves. . Goddess, wake up. Come home. You are welcome. Just as you are. . . . ✨🌙✨ . Radiant Goddess is open for registration. Message me for details. . Epic photo by @dariaxtaylor (at San Diego, California) https://www.instagram.com/p/CAYLIqsDp0h/?igshid=ts5b5iwvnskb