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#am I supposed to be like all nonchalant and act as if these things fall out of the sky #universe experiencing nothing but gloom thru me rn

#it’s not just a self-manipulation because it also generates the outcomes I desire..although not perfectly but it’s a better alternative #I wish it was effortless but appearing this way in this place.. at any cost #returning as much as I can because it doesn’t really belong to me and including the entirety of myself it all belongs to creation

#for recreation I played hidden brain on my pillow hoping Shankar will be in my dream #it’s an event within. not some external occasion #the end of my life or the end of the world or whoever is looming over me #and the conscious all gives me a little kiss or a hug #it’s not a fated thing it’s more like a response but I can only speak for myself

#I’ll never get this time back 😒 it’s time ‘invested’#and this time is not working for me rn.. I need it to be like 6 in the afternoon at this moment #and I wish I could go back to one moment in time 🥺 when I was being hugged #a very calm rabbit without a pocket watch

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#I’m really giving all of my unfeeling capabilities to my calorie deficit #otherwise like venting these things yelling I miss my cat! 🥺 because that one I know for sure #what could have been is yeah a very sad story but I have no idea what could have been!

#the calendar comforts me :) in my little moment bubble #it’s a very active thought process to let it go #and I’m so hungry 😭

#needing absolute quiet while I reprogram my frame of reality #the paperwork alone will probably take a week or so

#and the same message from a human wouldn’t be the same #who says I love not you but the things you make me feel #no it was as a result of but completely separate #I hate him lol #and I hate him hoping it will encode something in me and.. I really don’t know /:

#undoubtedly I blame the human need to overcomplicate. inhabiting me and #multiplying excessively and being like such an over growing weed #same with worry and fear etc #but the message was always simple altho I have no clue about the messenger #the same way a blinking cat is not telling us the future or what is the meaning of life #just very simply ‘I love you’

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#I love the Subaru ad with the giant puppy because it makes absolutely no sense :)#waiting to find out what depth will end this falling

#I can’t believe there is no where to go from here so I went outside and I walked a long time #until I felt like having cheesecake

#no because we’ll wait until something breaks to fix it #I’m half glue actually

#my wish for b is to spend more time in ur garden

#my wish for Americans is to eliminate amazon by Jeff Bezos #simple as that

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#they really do love to see me coming 😅 but #walking around like a robot but a sexy robot and men are smiling at me #hidden brain all the way to the flickering street light which I’m pretty sure was only flickering for me #street light… I heed you.. I will try to synchronize with your frequency #I am here and I will stay and I will observe all that I can #they reached thru to tell me my nature and therefore my purpose #do you have a rhythm or a cycle because that’s exactly what I’m talking about

#if I have to live on this earth I will suffer and I will burn and turn into stone

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