[Doesnt do it] [gets stressed] [gets scared thinking about doing it] [doesnt do it because it's scary] [keeps not doing it]

Did you know? That the back is made up of terrible and evil muscles that are only waiting for their chance to betray you

my high horse is actually awesome and fast like the wind

forgive and forget? no. resent and remember #mygrudge

do you think a cemetery angel and a gargoyle could fall in love

(Getting swindled by a genie) it’s like talking to a fucking tumblr user with you

the genie: how dare you say I'm fucking a tumblr user

DO NOT DOWNLOAD TUMBLR it will install a virus on your device called tumblr

does anybody want me in like a stray dog kinda way

playing stupid games but im really bad at them so im not even winning the stupid prizes

“Would you block someone just for disagreeing with you?” Pal, I’ll block someone for agreeing with me in the wrong tone of voice.

so cool how advanced the algorithm has become, it literally only takes like a decade or more of spying on all my internet activity and then it can expertly curate a selection of 15-20 youtube videos that i don't really want to watch, and then keep showing me those videos over and over again for a week so i can scroll past them again. the future is now

"theyre only friends" ONLY friends??? oonllyy friends??? friends is one of the most amazing things you can be