ITS ME IM SIDNEY

i remember when i first heard of sidney. i was like eleven and i was playing with my cousin in my grandparents house. she had all sorts of cool pokemon cards and i was jealous, and she had this one card called “sidneys stadium”. and everyone said “hey, that’s you”. and i didnt want to believe that it was me, because the sidney in the stadium had weird hair and was smirking, and i thought i was better than that. better than sidney. but as time progressed, i found myself yearning for that “sidneys stadium” card. i wanted it, because it reminded me of myself. it was a part of me. so i finally worked up the courage to ask for it, and since it wasnt even a real pokemon card my cousin agreed.

so now i had the sidney card. i kept it on my bookshelf and looked at it everyday. i grew to be fond of sidney, and i felt proud that i was, at the time, also called sidney. i dont remember whether my yugioh phase was before or after that, but a lot of what brought me back into pokemon was sidney. i loved pokemon, and i loved sidney. sidney was wonderful. even though sidney always had the same weird pose with the hands pulled up to the sides, and the legs sort of apart, and the hair standing straight up. i appreciated sidney for everything that sidney stood for. i think sidney appreciated me as well.

then, at some point, i heard about “ilasgoc”, and i saw that there wasnt a sidney. later i learned that there had been a sidney, but they had left. well, i was elated. i would finally get to show the world that i could represent sidney. me, sidney, as sidney; it was my dream realized. 

now, of course, all that is passed. im not even named sidney anymore. sidney was merely a path through the woods, a stepping-stone, a vehicle for me to realize my true self. sidney taught me what it really means to love yourself, to be happy with what you do. even if what you do is live in a guitar case outside the pokemon league with only your hair as sustenance. i was so happy when omega ruby and alpha sapphire came out, because sidney was in them, and i was elated when i found the part where you go into the room and sidney is there and then talks to you about steven stone and then leaves. sidney will always be one of my very favorite characters. i love sidney.

i hope other people love sidney too. i hope generations of sidneys to come will be proud to be named sidney. i am not sidney anymore, but i feel like there is still a glimmer of “sidney” within me. sometimes i miss sidney, but truly, sidney was never gone. sidney is always here.