Melrose_Arcade

I vetted you for weeks before submitting to you, you were careful with how you platformed people, you were specific to minimize harm that posts could achieve, you were a space to vent, and you cared about your safety. There was never "Omg, I'm an unemployed disabled trans woman, you guys can't be mean to me", because you seemed to understand the risks of a project like this. You had proper care to make sure this wasn't a harassment campaign, and very rarely did you speak on things yourself outside of "This was in fact rape".

This other blog though, it's been almost entirely Me Me Me. "I'm a disabled transneutral intersex PTSD survivor". There's been no care to minimize harm to you especially, or any other poster, especially given how they claimed to respect you. The blog seems to be accepting every single ask from people as an example of how hated and revered they are for the crime of being trans masc. The misuse of TME/TMA, the mishandling of stories, the genuine plagiarism off of your blogs project statement. This person seems no where near the correct mindspace to be running a serious project like this, and it's especially fucked that they keep sending people your way when you've paused submissions. (Not to mention potentially using AI to write for them).

Best care scenario, this is a child who doesn't know that what they're doing is fucked. But with DARVO displayed front and center, and a seeming focus on painting TMA individuals out to be evil, this seems to be a deliberate harassment campaign. I hope this individual fucks off, and, if opening a space like this is something they truly want to do, I hope they talk to a sexual assault specialist before starting a new project.

If all of us are trying to say that trans men are more privileged than trans women, try figuring out the root of our complaints.

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I was in my senior year of highschool, and had lost all of my friends, family, relationships due to a prior partner (See: "She paints femininity with words of malice".)

I had recently developed a friend group full of the only queer people in our school, two trans men, a cisbian, and a recently out lesbian girl. Me and the lesbian, who we'll refer to as my partner now, started dating, but she made it clear at the start of the relationship that she wanted to be the one to break the news. That I wasn't supposed to tell anyone yet, because she wanted to get her things in order before she came out to the whole school. I should've seen the problems here.

Our relationship continued in the shadows, we only met in parking lots, we would only go to dates in groups, she would continually say she just needed slightly more time to get her affairs in order, so I was respectful.

I had eventually spoken to the rest of the group, her friends not mine, and they let me know that in no uncertain terms, this is what I deserved. I was supposed to be the mature one due to the age difference (one grade, but two years). That I would be fucked up if I wanted to go public, that it was my fault for being "so loudly queer" (I.E. being transfem), and that her mother wasn't accepting of the trans agenda, but they could go over to her house all the time.

Eventually, my partner got more bold. She'd call me her shameful secret, she'd fantasy about trans rape fantasy. I was no longer her partner, I was just her dirty little secret. She would stop even being seen as friends with me, I was kicked from MY lunch table.

Our relationship never got sexual, so I'm sorry if this doesn't fit. There was one time we were kissing in the backseat of her car, in a parking lot a town away from her mother's house, and somebody walked past and she pushed me away and claimed I forced my way into her. The individual helped drag me out of her car, and she drove off. It wasn't until an hour later that she looped back around to see if I was still there. (I had already started walking a few miles away).

The worst part is that I fully believed it. I felt like an object, or a dirty sex pervert. It wasn't until she fully moved to a different town for college that we broke up. I really should have seen the signs.

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I was 16, and my girlfriend at the time would coerce me into sex. She wouldn't respond well to being told no. She'd nag, and beg, and try to force herself onto me. I was told by friends and my parents at the time that it wasn't rape because I was "male", and I was the top.

She would never explicitly respond to a "no" with violence. She'd call me gross, or tell me I was wasting our relationship, or tell me I made her feel undesirable.

Then, later at an undetermined time, she would hit me. She would scream at me, yell that she was only doing this because I made her feel undesirable. She would berate me, and tell people at school and in my life that I was such a shitty undeserving partner. She would consistently push herself onto me, literally chasing me down in the woods one night. Then yell at me that I wanted it, that simply because my body was hard that she could do whatever. She would tell me I was aggressive, even violent, during sex. She would tell me over and over again how unlovable I was. She loved to tell me that I deserved it if I was going to be a woman, that being feminine comes with this curse. She painted the words of feminity to be one of such malice and diagust.

Then she started cheating on me, sleeping with people I genuinely cared about. Made it about how I kept refusing sex, so she has to get it from somewhere. How I was at fault for not matching her needs as a top. She would tell me I wasn't even worth the effort, the effort being rape.People can absolutely weaponize their privilege and their status against trans women. She was such a "heavy advocate" to the trans men in our lives, she claimed she was pro-sex work. But she demonized and raped me. Convinced me it wasn't even rape because I was the top. She was loved and protected by the gay men, and the trans men we knew. There was this impression that because I was transfem, I was unbelievable. It's made me feel unlovable to this very day, and I carry a lot of blame for "being in charge" of something I was forced to do.

Sorry if this is too long or formatted weirdly.

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trans women can never speak because we're already apparently soaking up all the attention... nevermind that the "attention" is fearmongering government propaganda