You will remember me, and then you will lose yourself in that misery.

Perhaps the only thing love cannot be is free of pain.

I wonder why loving had been so painful and so suffocating? // Is it love when you have to destroy yourself to love another? Isn’t it just misery. Yes it was misery I was in, not love // How could love be so painful? My heart still bleeds itself raw at the thought of you. In all words, metaphors, philosophy I call love the most miserable thing to fall into // Your absence has brought me peace, that’s the kindest thing you’ve done to me // I may still softly think of you but I’ll cut my hands off before they reach you // Is your heart at peace now that I have left? // I will remember not to starve myself anymore // You broke me to pieces and I called it love // Now where are you and where am I? // Don’t come, I’m no longer waiting // On hope that we never meet again // What about the plans that we made?

Why do you still remember the love when you no longer love them?

End my suffering— leave me and never come back.

You were the only colour in my world filled with black.

“But you mesmerise me, love. When you told me your name, I forgot everything else. I melt when you call me by my name and I can see nothing else except those eyes. You mesmerise me and that is why you scare me. I am scared to fall for you. No, I dread to fall in love with you because you will not and I will be left alone watching the door. But you mesmerise me, you do, love. And this is why I must avoid you, I must run away from you.”

Grief is love we hold onto that we could not give. It is the love that had nowhere to go and we kept it buried in our hearts mistaking it for pain and anger. Perhaps I think some people are meant to give more love than they can ever receive. And that is why they are always so much in mourning and grieving. Because love that has nowhere to go is the love that eats away at your heart. It is only so heavy and painful. Don’t you think?