girlboss inc.

Shoutout to Disney’s Descendants for having the most vibes based worldbuilding I’ve ever seen in my life. Legitimately thinking about any of it for more than two seconds makes everything crumble apart logistically and I think there’s an art in that.

Messing up my customer service hotline job and playing a gunshot sound effect over the phone then coming back with a slightly different accent

I think a car should be able to heal from its injuries. Its a living thing.

Yes yes yes this scene thank you for the tag, heehehehe

It’s funny because this scene must be based on the memoir Special Agent by Candis DeLong. In it she describes being out looking at clothes at a department store on lunch break with another female agent and overhearing a conversation between a man and a woman in which he says he’s an FBI agent. They peer around some clothes racks thinking that they’re going to see one of their fellow agents trying to get a date, and when they don’t recognize the guy they go over and pretend to be interested in the big strong FBI agent themselves and ask to see his badge. The guy actually pulled out a fake badge, whereupon they said “Huh, that doesn’t look anything like ours…”, produced their own badges and arrested him for impersonating an FBI agent. (I remember this bit from a 25 year old book because I actually stole it myself for a fic)

Exquisite. Glorious. 10/10 thank you for sharing.

“you can’t ship them, it’s weird/toxic/problematic/whatever—” have you considered that that’s exactly why i ship them

any time i copy paste a message to send to 2 different chats i feel like such a fake ass bitch but im choosing to look at it as the digital equivalent of standing in a doorway hollering so people in both rooms can hear me

*driving in my smart car* Google glass, show me the nearest e-cig shop! *beeping sound* ugh no! Only show ones that accept Bitcoin!

this was considered an outlandish joke in 2014

the only thing stronger than the gastric distress i get from eating cherries is my love for eating cherries

what

thank you. im once again reminded why i love tumblr because where else could i get content like this

i'm opening up our relationship so bugs can get in

an interest passing feels like being abandoned by the evil spirit that had taken possession of your body

pulling out hanks of grass and sighing listlessly. i kind of miss being posessed. isn't there an evil spirit somewhere that wants to possess meeee