Yikes™

“got ya’ something.” the girl was unsuccessfully hiding some coffee behind her back. what could she say? she didn’t have a lot of money, but she did have enough for caffeine. and eva felt like that was worth for something.

Elias spinning around in the chair at the dorm’s front desk when he was approached. “I am a just and honorable dorm advisor so I can’t accept this if this is a bribe.” Almost everything he said was a blatant lie. “Also I don’t have the power to switch your roommate, if that’s what this is about.”

“What? Do I have something on me?” Jai said as he looked on himself for anything out of the ordinary. He reached his hand to his back and pulled off a sign that said Kick me, I’m a nerd that was clearly taped on his back. “I swear whoever put this on my back likes to believe they have a great sense of humor, but I have an idea on who did this.”

Elias couldn’t help but laugh at the juvenile prank. It wasn’t anything elaborate, but it amused him all the same. “Whoever it was does have a pretty good sense of humor. I can only hope this starts a chain reaction of people taping signs like that on everyone’s back.”

   ‘ oh – like a self sacrifice so your comrades can get out, or like a major fuck up oversight that gets you taken out by the explosion you had planned – but like, the people you had bought the tnt from purposefully shortened the fuse so you didn’t have time to escape kind of thing ? ‘  the more she went off on a tangent, the more she leaned further in, only pulling back to end with a laugh, ‘ not that i’ve planned to do that to anybody !’ she seriously hadn’t, but it was just her terrible attempt at a joke.

Elias let out a loud laugh, “Oh I definitely don’t plan on sacrificing myself for someone else. I’m not that selfless and a bit too heroic for my tastes. Besides, the second option sounds much more interesting. I love a good plot twist, even if it’s what takes me out in the end.” Another laugh followed. As usual, he wasn’t taking any part of the conversation all too seriously. “Of course not. Only a truly evil mastermind would come up with something like that.”

“Even if your laugh betrays you, I can give you the benefit of the doubt and think that you’re a saint.” She’d rather have someone sober up rather them being in the middle of the street or alley. “Who knows, it could have been the next drunk person I saw. Maybe you were just at the right place and the right time.” Her head tilts to the side with a thoughtful expression. “Which city? New York? Gotham? Star City? I can list a good thirty more, but family businesses are always great.” 

Another chuckle escaped him. “You might be the first and only person to think that.” Elias didn’t care about his reputation, he was who he was and saw no reason to change it. “Well there certainly no short supply of those around here. It is a college town after all. But there’s always a first for everything. I’m usually at the wrong place at the wrong time.” Which was truthfully his own doing more often than not. “Ya know, being born and raised in New York I always forget there are other cities out there.”

“Wow– you were ready. I’m as impressed as I am adamant that I’m not changing your grade.”

“I’m always ready to argue and complain.” Elias boasted. “I hear you and completely understand, but I don’t think you know the full story behind why my work wasn’t super duper great and therefore raise my grade.”

“That’s a good way to end your night, I just hope you didn’t find trouble along the way.” Which trouble… seemed to always be a pain. Especially when nights were supposed to be good. “No, no, it’s all covered. Don’t even worry about it, think of it as a way to help you sober up. Especially after a night of celebrating.” But he did have a good point. Coffee and greasy food did sound good, especially after her shift at Karma. “I think there’s a diner around here, if you’re into that place. It’s not the best service, but decent food.” 

“Me? Find trouble? Never. I’m practically a saint.” Elias tried to speak with a straight face but ended up laughing. He was almost always looking for trouble and pulling all sorts of stunts for attention. “Wow free food and passing grades, the universe is finally rewarding me.” Another joke flew out of his mouth. “It’s a real shame we’re not in the city. I know a great diner with excellent service. Then again, a family friend works there so I could be a little biased.”

“I just sent out grades….so you know what this means? There’s about a 5 minute delay until I get emails complaining about them.”

“I would like to go above and beyond by filing a formal complaint in person about my grades before I even see them. See, I already know that they’re not what most people would call acceptable and am I to blame? Probably! But I’m still here to complain.”

“Thanos is a punk bitch.” Carol deadpanned. “Fought the guy multiple times, beat him multiple times. Mad Titan, my ass.”

“Fuck yeah! Suck it, Thanos!” Elias laughed loudly. “I always knew in my heart that the big guy wasn’t all that. Thanks for confirming it.”

Corinna had to agree, not a fan of the blood-sucking creatures that irritated at her flesh. She remembered how she got a bite right on her cheek and was often stuck rubbing at it as Spoiler when she was on patrol and how ridiculous the whole situation was. Her own shortlived laugh broke through at the pun, head shaking slightly at how a comment so dumb, could be so entertaining. “Lit from drinking?” Eyes glanced at the other, Corinna bit down on her lip in thought. “Do you need food or anything? Anything to sober you up? My treat on a not-so-smarty-pants answer?”

“Yeah, see it looks like I’m going to pass the semester, which is truly some sort of miracle so naturally I had to go out and celebrate.” Barely scrapping by was probably not something he should have been proud of, but with what little effort he actually put into school it was a rather surprising accomplishment. “I’ll take you up on that, but like don’t expect me somehow pay you back. I’m garbage at remembering to do things like that.” That and he never really cared to. “I’d kill for some coffee and greasy diner food.”

“Anything anything.“ Hunter said with a smile. he was liking where this was going. “What kind of prank are talking here? And where exactly?“

“Excellent! And here I was thinking everyone around here had lost their sense of humor.” Elias laughed loudly. “The details are currently classified, but I can tell you where we’re headed. We’re off to a certain person’s dorm room.”

        ‘ i’ve had a few offers, trust me – ‘ she continued,   ‘ apparently, a lot of people want to kill me around town,’ ending with a shrug. maybe it’s an overstatement,   but she can think of at least 3 or so people she’d have no trouble convincing.     ‘   do elaborate, on your big bang ? what are you thinking ?      not that i’m gonna steal your ideas or anything,’ 

“Well at least you can say you’re making great progress on your goal then.” Elias certainly bothered a lot of people but he was pretty confident he hadn’t pushed anyone’s buttons enough for them to want to murder him. “I gotta be honest, it’s currently a work in progress. But I’m thinking something along the lines of robbing a bank, epic car chase, but tragically I don’t make it out.”

“Mosquitoes just suck...literally.” His comment was followed by laughter. Even if no one else found him amusing, he seemingly never ceased to make himself laugh. “If you were looking for some smarty-pants answer though, I’m afraid I’m still a bit too lit from my night out to come up with anything profound.”

“Well see, it wasn’t really my fault. The coffee maker just kind of exploded, suddenly, for no reason. And then it might’ve set the toaster on fire. But it’s fine. No biggie, right?”

Elias had a fake serious expression before returning to his usual carefree self. “Luckily for me, those problems don’t sound like the type your average dorm advisor deals with.” Not that he would deal with them if they were part of his responsibilities. “As long as it doesn’t burn the whole school down, I personally do not care.”

“Electric type pokemon just don’t get enough love,” Peter signed, expecting his conversation partner to keep up with him. “And I’m not just saying that because my dad is Thor.”

“Look, I gotta be honest with ya, I don’t really know a lot about pokemon. I never really got into as kid. I know, I know it was truly a tragic childhood, but I somehow survived.”